first things first, im a noob. i dont know what im doing, i just heard about pua and started watching videos on youtube. so i have a lot to learn and i would appreciate any advice, no matter how obvious or elementary it is.

so i have been watching a load of videos of this guy called lovedrop. he talks a lot about value, percieved value and the value differential. he basically states that in order to make yourself attractive, you have to aim to do things that raise your value and avoid doing things that lower it. he explains a number of techniques and theorems involving body language, social interaction and even evolutionary psychology. it all seemed to make perfect sense, like if i practised enough i would be able to conduct a social interaction with mathematical control and precision. i know its not quite that simple in reality, but one of my problems is that i am not very observant, so i figured if i learnt to recognise value differentials then i might actually know whats going on more than a quarter of the time!

i also have a bit of AA, so i have been trying to exercise my way out of that with the usual; smile, open posture, dont think about it, just approach, all that stuff. then i bumped into an old friend and he invited me out on saturday night with a load of people i had never met before, and to cut a long story short, he crashed out and went home, leaving me in a loud club, a little tipsy, dancing with a couple whom he lived with, who i didnt really know. they werent particularly bothered with me, so i was pretty much on my own in a strange place, nobody had ever seen me before. so i thought, screw it, im gonna open some people, say some random stuff to them and it doesnt matter if i get rejected or tooled, nobody is watching. as long as i dont get punched.

anyway one of the first things lovedrop mentions is that if you are facing somebody during a social interaction, it means you are reacting to them, which makes you lower value than them. he recommends that you open while facing in another direction, as if youre not really paying attention, and if you get a good response, a DHV or an IOI, reward them by turning towards them and giving them more attention. he also says you should throw in a compliance test, but this is my first time out, so i am happy just to have the courage to initiate a pleasant exchange with someone i have never met.

so all that sounds easy. but i started to find, in practise, i would choose a girl at random and just walk up and stand next to her. but the place is pretty packed, so near everyone is standing next to her anyway so she doesnt really notice. i cant just stand there and wait for her to notice me, because i only have a few seconds to open, otherwise i am just hovering around her like a weirdo. and because its so loud in this club, i have to turn to her and speak into her ear, otherwise shes not gonna hear me. so i pretty much end up walking up to some random girl and shouting into her ear about some random subject, and its hard to shout into somebodys ear without leaning forward. so basically, i look like an idiot and she just ignores me.

oh well, all is not lost. i pretty much smashed through my AA out of sheer determination, walking up to about 10 girls and starting a conversation, and getting dead silence in reply from all but two of them. and one of the two was a club rep anyway. she told me where i could check my jacket in. lol.

and i didnt care. screw the people i was talking to. they were not the point. my AA was the point. i have desensetised myself to rejection and now i really dont care who wants to talk to me and who doesnt, and that is the point. isnt it? tell me if im wrong.

but the body language and value thing was basically a disaster. i ended up pretty mch doing the opposite of what i was supposed to do. and i still cant really figure out how i should have been approaching.

i started thinking about it properly, and i realised that although im rubbish at observation, i do sometimes notice girls noticing me. and i realised that most of them seem to do the same thing.

they wander into my field of vision, and stand with their back to me. then they look over their shoulder and hold my eye contact for a few seconds. then they turn round again. flick of the hair optional, etc, etc. but before that night in the club, i just never approached women. i just didnt do it. so im sitting there, not staring at her, but keeping my eye on her, and shes still got her back turned, shes still standing there. shes waiting for me to come over and open her. she often has another quick glance over her shoulder to see where i am, as if shes thinking, why isnt he coming? havent i made it obvious enough? what does he want me to do, flash at him?

the point i am making is, she is standing with her back to me. and if i walk up to her, ill be facing her when i open. i cant see how to play it any other way. i am facing her, i open and she has to turn round and reward me with her attention. its the wrong way round. so i suppose the question is, what the hell am i doing wrong?

i realise that most, if not all of this sounds incredibly stupid. i did say i was a noob. i cant use the excuse that im a virgin, but to be fair the only experience i have really had with women is when they have pretty much forced themselves on me and i didnt have to do anything at all. so imo i have nil experience and need all the help i can get. i hope someone understands.