| The first thing to remember, is ultimately, one is useless without the other. Eye contact without a slow smile, is like a crackle without a pop. Notice how I mention a 'slow' smile. This should gradually grow on your face as you maintain eye contact, and should not immediately dart up out of nowhere. Someone that maintains eye contact, but refuses to smile, would be labeled a freak of some sort. On the other hand, smiling without eye contact, for all she knows, you could be smiling at a random thought in your head. You have to acknowledge when you look at her, that you are interested; so you smile. And likewise, when you smile, she has to know the smile for HER, therefore, make eye contact, and engage her.
You also have to remember that a stare, a gaze and a glance are 3 different things.
Body is also a big issue. Do not slouch or lean against the walls. This is a sign of laziness and puts forward the idea that you are not interested at all, despite the cheesy, inviting grin in your face. It's best to stand up straight, or if you are sitting, possibly lean back confidently, not cockily.
For the record, whether you plan on picking up a girl, maybe just for making friends or possibly, just a polite greeting to a stranger passing by. There always, always always has to be eye contact! Studies have shown that whilst women (and men) are conversing, and one seems to withhold eye contact, they are likely to assume that you are shifty, shy, sneaky, snobbish and possibly a liar.
How long should the eye contact last?
Well; Try this:
"After you've smiled, silently say, 'I like you' to your eye contact recipient. There are three advantages to this:
1. The time it takes for you to say to yourself 'I like you', is precisely the amount of time your lingering eye contact should last (debatable)
2. Saying the words silently gives you a warm expression. Unless you really work at it, your mind can't say 'I like you' while your face is saying 'You intimidate me' at the same time.
2.Your inner monologue keeps your mind from racing to other thoughts -- like 'I wonder what they think of me?"
-An extract taken from a magnificent book entitled 'How to Feel Confident', written by Leil Lowndes
Good Luck! _________________ Just Do It™
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