Hey guys, I really need your help here and some real advice from experience. A litte history about me...I'm decent/good looking, in shape, 28yrs old. I've never been able to approach in my lifetime...maybe the odd times here and there but very rarely. I get extremely nervous and fidgety, I don't know what to say, and I hate looking foolish and like an idiot if i'm rejected in a terrible manner. My actual relationships i've been in, I was picked up by the girls. I was in a 8 years relationship and 3 mths after that ended, I was in a 2 year relationship. So basically from 18-28 i've been in relationships. I now just want to get into pick up and meet a lot of hot girls. I got into online dating in the past couple of months and picked up like 20-25 girls without any problems. I met up with half of them and fclosed all of them by the 2nd date. My game is good over the phone, text and in person, but I have extreme difficulties getting the numbers and dates in person which is what I want to accomplish. I decided to stop online dating because i'm sick of it...my game is not improving one bit (where I want improvement), and all of the girls i've met have been -2HB in comparisson to the pics. So if I see an HB8 online, they're really an HB6 when I see them in person...and the same principles apply for all...so I can never meet an actual HB online, they're all uglier and fatter in person lol sorry to be so blunt...but it's been disappointing.

So I now want to get into daygame and nightgame. I've been researching hot spots in my area and I found a couple of good areas for daygame along with nightgame (excluding clubs). I put myself in those spots in the past week to analyze and maybe do something...and for the life of me I couldn't grow any balls to approach. I was at a coffee shop yesterday and I saw a big group of 6 but I thought to myself, that's like feeding myself to the wolves...I think it's impossible to approach a huge set like that, am I wrong? How would I even open them? In a coffee shop environment, I feel that people are there to catch up with each other..would I not fail if I attempted to approach by pissing them off, interrupting there conversations, or should I not care? That's how I look and think about it...so I never approach. I saw a couple of small sets in the coffee shop but I just couldn't approach.
Last night, I was in a bar/lounge. The place was busy, maybe 60/40% ration guys to girls. 90% of the girls were HB9 and up. I was trying to get eye contact from a lot of them but they looked overly snobby and into themselves...I couldn't get eye contact back from any of them...they also had a facial reaction like if you even attempt to approach me i'll bite your head off lol. Is this normal for HB9s and up? Most groups at this bar were in groups of 4, 5, 6...no small groups...and like I said, the groups were full of HB9 and 10s. How can I approach such a group like this with confidence? What do I even talk about when opening? Do I need a wing to help? Also, last night...I witnessed a 2 set just sitting at the bar table looking at guys, bored out of there minds so I figured, maybe that the perfect set to open bc it actually looked like they wanted to be approached with the looks they were giving..I got eye contact from them multiple times...I was actually planning on going for it until 5 guys sat the there table (actual friends), so I thought it was a bit weird that they were doing that...not sure if I just read them the wrong way maybe...

I want to also bring up something I did last month to try and get over my approach anxiety and issues (had a few drinks in me though, was the only way). I read a situation opener from gambler and I tried it with a 4 set. I was analyzing myself and I was terrible...I was again nervous, fidgety, wasn't standing firm, voice was crackling and I stumbled on a few words from nervousness, eye contact was ok, was moving around too much and my arms were everywhere...it was just bad. What's funny is that when I asked a friend how I did, he said you looked great..I know I didn't and these guys are not into pickup so they don't know much...I know and felt all my fuckups. The opener also went dead in the water b/c I got them talking about themselves for 15 mins and then I had no where to go with after because they were giving advice on the situational opener. I moved to a lounge booth which fits more people and invited them up but they declined b/c they were catching up...I didn't know any other way to escalate. That was the first time I ever opened a group in my life and it kind of went really bad...scared me a bit too lol

I've been reading a lot around here and I also paid for gamblers pickupartistuniversity...i'm 7 mths in and watched all of the videos but it's not helping..

Anyway, hope I didn't write too much...wish someone can offer some advice for the next time I go out..

Thanks guys

Stop thinking so much. Try not to be in your head as much as you are. When you spot you have to push yourself to just start moving. The next thing you know you're in front of them and talking. The more you work on making approaching a "reaction" instead of a "concious thought" the easier it will get. Just takes time man. You'll get it!

_________________
Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...

Thanks J!

ok the problem is your nervous and your scared of rejection. The only way not to be afraid of rejection is to see rejection as a good thing..rejection is a stepping stone toward better game its like in all walks of life the more you fail the closer you will come to success. So bascily 3 weeks ago I used to be like you terrified of appraoching because I knew if I got rejected it would haunt me and make me fell worthless and self conscience about my self... But know I understand that the more I get rejected the better I become as a player . So go out and get rejected but learn from your mistakes.