LOL You don't DHV and Neg your friends WTF, this is why people think PUA messes people up.
At any rate this is my advice, this ended up a bit longer than I intended but:
-Read all the PUA material you can get your hands on
-Read some books/essays on body language
-Learn to project your voice and make it your natural voice:
http://www.afctopua.com/articles/vocal- ... -powerful/
-Study your friends
-Work on your frame
Realize that if I was watching you play, and had never met you before, even as a man I would assume going up to your table to say hello to tell you I liked your set, my assumption would be I was stepping into your world and reality since you're the lead singer. Most women will probably be thinking the same way. Obviously a band is a group effort, but this is the image people have. So you already have that going for you, you can open sets, introduce girls to your friends, and be the leader without even really trying.
For now work on being part of the conversation, when there is a lull tell a story or whatever is natural, be the leader of the conversation. Furthermore when you find a girl you like address her directly, ignore the group, and extract her to the bar for a shot or something. This will be a clear indicator to your friends that you want this particular girl, if they are jerks they will try to cock block and AMOG you, if they are your friends they will think "Good for him". If they are as good looking and alpha as you say, they have plenty of girls. Everyone has to start somewhere.
You also need to work on your self esteem, having a limp is not a huge deal, and while it might deprive you of a certain grace, it doesn't deprive you from having style, being funny, witty, intelligent or sexual.