after a relationship anxiety



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PostPosted: Mon Apr 14, 2014 2:43 pm 
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I am haveing an extreme amount of anxiety after a ruff break up with my ex. We broke up about 2 months ago and it still lingers in my mind even when picking up women. It has became a serious problem that has had a direct impact on my game. The last i spoke to her was about 4 days ago as we finally moved foward. I keep trying to find a way to reconnect with her and to re-enter a relationship with her, but It keeps failing and keeps hurting my ego and i have been counter attacking that by currently throwing myself in a love triangle. In this love triangle i have 3 girls that i keep sleeping with continuesly so there is no lack of sex but if anything has increased dramatically. In matter of fact i pulled haveing sex with 3 girls in the same day but heres the twisted part it was with my ex in the morning after she slept over then with the other two one before my meeting at night and then another slept over at night. I am not new to the game and i have been around it for a while to the point where friends and people who are mutual friends ask me for advice. I guess what my problem is i cant stop thinking about my ex even when im clearly doing well with other women. The problem is she is still on my mind and its giveing me trouble with picking up new women outside the love triangle and i am not sure how to clear my mind and guilt so i can progress. Any tips or pointers? How do i stop careing about her or loveing her? How do i get over the social anxiety that this has created?


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 15, 2014 7:05 pm 
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To stop thinking about her i think you first need to stop seeing her. Just say no and go do your hobbies and connect with other girls. Don't just sleep with these girls, get to know them at least a little bit.


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 30, 2014 12:07 pm 
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Quote:
In matter of fact i pulled haveing sex with 3 girls in the same day but heres the twisted part it was with my ex in the morning after she slept over then with the other two one before my meeting at night and then another slept over at night.
I my god what a horrible problem you have in life.. I feel so sorry for you! :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 15, 2014 10:47 am 
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The answer is obvious, but not easy when you are in love. When My ex cheated on me, I honestly saw no hope for us and didn't even try this, though I should have in order to expedite the process of getting over her. I just kept talking to her because it felt good, but I knew it would end. I was at least hoping that at some point she would be decent to me and give me a proper farewell if I kept talking to her, but she just wasn't a decent person. It just dragged it out.

In your situation, you may have hope. Either way, cut contact with her for a month, go on dates and keep the sex to a minimum (sexual chemistry should be evaluated when you meet these girls, but it shouldn't eclipse any opportunities to get to know these girls as people.) Meet girls with a clear and well defined list of personality traits that you look for in a partner. See how these girls stack up. Go at it with the objective of "seeing if she can be replaced." Remember, any experiences you had with her are independent from her and replaceable, you can have those same experiences, different ones, and better ones with anyone else. You need to see if SHE is replaceable.

After a month or two of this, you can re-initiate contact if you truly feel you want her back, and if you did it right and actually got some samples of whats out there, you will have a much more level head to successfully rebuild a brand new relationship with your ex from scratch. Remember, don't meet girls with the objective of getting her back, meet girls with the objective of seeing if you actually want her back. You have to not want her back before you can think straight enough to actually get her back.

In short, it isn't likely to happen because you have to no longer care if it happens before you can make it happen. By the time you are ready to create a new relationship with her successfully, you probably wont bother because not caring is a requirement for it to work.


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