I would like to apologize for my English, as it's not my first language.
I don't know if this post releted to this forum, and maybe I should have write where I can get professional advice.
In these days, I'm dealing with terrible emotions. I had a very unpleasant experience that left me with Anxiety, Embarrassment and Humiliation. A very traumatic incident.
The most hurtful thing is that many people, I meane...many many people know about this Humiliation and Embarrassment that I'm afraid to leave my house and deal with thier whisperd and stares. I'm talking about a very serious embarrassment that I had in public. I feel shock everytime I remember it. sometimes I take Valium to calm down.
When I've read the game, I remember that Style met two spciel people. Steve P and Rasputin (Hypnitica) that really don't give a shit about what other people think about them and live in thier own reality. I must quote Rasputin:
"You don't shower
or shave for a month, until you smell like a sewer. Then you walk around
for two weeks wearing a dress and a goalie mask with a dildo strapped to
the front. That's what I did. And I will never be afraid of public humiliation
Now, I dont even consider to do that but my point is that two people and some other Inner Game teachers and maybe even you guys can help me to deal with this thing. I really want to walk around all this people and don't give a shit about them but it just look impposible, I can't ignore it. I know they talking about what happend to me in from of so many people. How can I walk through them calm and apathetic to their gossips?
Stop taking life so seriously. There are over 7 billion people on this planet. Why do you think you matter so much?