Hello Guys. I am new to PUA, I found out about it about half a year or so ago but never used it until recently. I wanted to ensure I knew the material before I did something stupid… I am sensible like that. No idea where to post this question, so I thought this would be as good a place as any.


Three weeks ago I went to a nightclub for a friend’s birthday outing (my first time at a club) and I managed to picked up an HB8, who is an ex go-go dancer!

The Abridged Story of How I Met Her:
She bumped into my friend so I shot in with a playful Neg. The interaction went well, but was rocky at first, I did some DHV and showed disinterest and the next thing I knew she was qualifying herself to me and showing IOIs. Soon there after I managed to walk her around the room on my arm, I told her I wanted her to meet a friend. I waved at some strangers and stopped to speak to some people I knew in order to show her off and give myself value. After 15minuests she said she had to go back to her friends and I let her go. I saw her again later, she tried to get me onto the dance floor, but I just waved and walked off.

Much later I found her with some other guy, an AFC if ever I saw one, he was dancing around her acting a bit odd. I swept her away from him, and after a few minuets tried to get her to come to another venue, but she wouldn’t because of her friends. I started walking away with a big bye-bye wave and she called me back. I got her number with a kiss close. There is more to the story but... that’s the basic meeting point.

Second Day
I got her number and called her after a smart little text that had some DHV and Negs. I invited her to a party the following Monday. She came, and drove a long way to be there so that was a pretty big IOI I’d say. Before we went to the party I took her to a small bar, I bought her a drink she bought me a drink we had a chat. I know two of the bar tenders there but it was just my luck that they weren’t there.

Anyway, the chat didn’t go sooo well. On the walk to the party I tested her interest by walking near to her and put my hand right inside of hers. She didn’t grip but our hands touched so I just grabbed hers. She said I was ‘very forward’ and I didn’t reply. She let go with in 3 or so minuets to look in her bag. I looked at my hand and frowned at her and she said sorry. I said it was ok as there was a dip in the road... she laughed and said yes.

At the party she really turned heads. Girls were jealous and so were the guys... it literally destroyed the room. I was most surprised. The main problem was, this was a party on a Monday night, she got there at 10 (as we spent an hour at the bar) and most had left by 11. She stayed till 12. The last hour was good and allowed for some good comfort building. I walked her back to her car, and gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek. I think she wanted more but the night didn’t go well enough for anything else. I said we’ll hook up again and she agreed. It seemed like I was in a good place.

Since
I dropped her a text a few days later asking her to lunch. She said she couldn’t make it, but “she’ll arrange to meet with me next week”. I phoned her for a small chat (5 minuets I was waiting for a Bus) and she said she wasn’t enjoying her job and going to spend time at a friend's over the weekend. I didn’t contact her for 11days, but yesterday I sent her a text, it was something about her horoscope with a light Neg. As of yet I haven’t had a reply. Usually I have to send her two text to get one, but I always ensure they don’t seem needy, I do it in such a way so the second text seems like something else I had to say, an ALSO. But I left it to long for the ALSO text now.


My Intention and Problem
Quite honestly, I’d like to keep her as a friend, as she gives off a hell of a lot of value and I see more potential there then anywhere else. Also, as she is a Ex go-go dancer she gets into a lot of clubs for free. I like her a lot, shes a nice person and would make a very useful friend. I am playing the long game here and I need a good female friend, and she is GOLD!

Here is the problem... HOW can I become a HB8s friend? I know she has a lot of friends because her phone was going all night when I was with her. SO what can I do? What do I need to do? I have nothing lined up and only small ideas.

I am pretty sure I am in a good place with her, not the best place but a good place.

Well this is an odd question which never comes up too much...but fair.

If you want to get a beautiful girl to sleep with you, you make the transformation from an AFC to a PUA. I suppose, you would do the opposite to get her to be friends, from PUA to AFC? Just act like a nice guy and do not neg, just be kind and sweet. I don't see why you would want this though, if she was an actual HB8, because you can still attract and seduce her AND be her friend at the same time. You can be FwB (friends with benefits) which actually does let you have your cake and eat it to.


- Memento

First off, to correct within your game. When you put your hand near hers... you should of grabbed her had help it and see if she put pressure back. If there was non just throw her hand away like she did something wrong. And NEVER apologize for anything.

To be put in lets just be friends zone you need to tease and tell funny stories.
Just tell her that you want her to meet your friends and all you want to do is hang out because shes a cool person. Just don't do any sort of kino with her. And don't escualte into sexual conversation. Just ask questions about her daily life but keep her interested with stories and jokes.

Hope this helps.

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Perception is Reality

Oh, she is an actual HB8 Memento, no question of that. She has the ability to change the dynamics of a room just by walking into it, I’ve never known that before. She gives me so much value just by association. I was paying a great deal of attention to other peoples reaction on meeting her. Guys fall silent and slip into AFC mode, if they have the balls to talk at all, and women give me IOIs while the less attractive girls leave the room. I see potential there!

I want to hang out with her and use her as a tool, as she is the ultimate wing-girl. As long as she is on my arm, her power is my power. What this girl’s friendship could do for my life in 6 months outshines sleeping with her, and losing her magic powers. Plus I am not really in the best place to cater to a HB8. So keeping her on the back burner and playing the long game seems smarter. I am in no hurry.


Thanks Trivial. That’s pretty much what I have been doing. Keeping away from innuendos and having nice chit-chats. My only worry is that it wont be enough to keep a girl like her interested. I am a little worried I am going to lose her… which in my mind will seem like a step backwards.

As for the Kino, she did wrap her fingers but she didn’t initiate the grip. Usually I found the girl will initiate the grip once they know your hand is there. But due to her comment and pull away before reaching the location, I was a little unsure about her interest. I didn’t initiate anymore Kino, that was just a test of sorts.


Still I am racking my mind. What should I do next? Just invite her out on little gathering? Maybe show some flair for fashion and become her shopping buddy?

It seems harder to be a HB8’s friend that actually seducing them!

That funny before that last comment I was going to post it. We never think... how am I going to be friends with this girl lol.

This is such a tricky subject. Because you can be that friend with her that she likes to hang out with her and chit chat and associate with friends. Or you can be that friend when she see you she screams your name and jumps on you when she gives you a hug(social proof).

I think you want her to be that second type of friend. What I have seem to have is to be that second type a friend (which is basically all my friends who are girls and have always been like that). I think it is because girls that are taken by my friends or are not attracted to I still am cocky funny with them and neg them but at the same time I will talk about how there boyfriend is such a great guy or what guys has she been talking to (basically listening to her problems and disqualifying myself but kind of being that friend who will be there for her). This keeps sexual tension but not enough for her to like you but to keep you as a friend that she likes but at the same time wouldn't cross the boundaries because you know each other to well and it would be awkward.

I know it might sound confusing but I still hope it helps lol!

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Perception is Reality

This is a tough situation to try and expound upon. For the most part, initially you could've pursued and most likely scored yourself a bonafide 8, but by taking an alternative route that won't get you into her bed in the present tense, you may have just earned something more important. A beautiful wing women, and I think that route could have unlimited benefits, stick with that for a while and see where it goes. Good honest decision.

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i lust for jessica alba, but now since she is preggers. I am lusting for Nicole!!! It's New Year's Day. It was Ben Franklin who said, "Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man."

Why don't you just be direct and tell her you want to be friends? I've never done something like this before, but it can probably go one of two ways: she'll agree and you'll be like fuckin BFFs or whatever, or she'll get more attracted to you. LJBF her. Another thing you can do is start asking for her advice about other women you're attracted to: try to get her opinion on what you should do about some girl you're in to. Hell, even ask her to be your wingwoman.

I've never tested out any of that crap, so take it with a grain of salt.

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The perfect 5th

Although you just want to be friends you still need to avoid any AFC type moves towards her. By doing so she will try to put you in that pile of "admirers" that used to be fun but fell for her. And it will be akward and she will not want to hang with you. You could instead go in a group setting and open sets for both of you, like friendly chit chat and the like. She will get to speak to other guys while you get to talk to other girls. She will notice the dynamic shift and go with it... if not she may pull you aside and want you all to herself. At any rate if the first scenario works out she will always want you to come out with her to meet new people because she will associate meeting new friends and having a good time with you being there with her.

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Let the Lyrics do your talking

Great advice guys! Its really useful and thankfully confirming that I am on the right path.

Thus far my interaction with her has been between AFC and PUA. I told her I think She’s Cool, Interesting, Socially Skilled and will make A Good Friend and I’ve kept away from any heavy innuendos. I still Neg her and DHV, but I’ll listen to her problems... somewhat... By that I mean if she talks about her Ex-boyfriend or her job, I will ask a few questions (three or so) and tell her its ‘Ok’ Etc.

So I think I am walking the right line? Agreed?


BUT the main problem is that I haven’t seen her for a while now. I feel I need to set something up for this weekend, and I need to do it today, or else she’ll have plans by tomorrow. If I wait any longer to see her it’s going to go cold.

So what is friend zone activity? Any ideas or advice on a good place to go or something to do? She doesn’t live to near by, so she isn’t going to drive down for a coffee.

Why do you just want to be "friends" with her? Is it because you feel you fucked it up? Personally, you should have kissed her that night. Sometimes, they want the man to be "very forward" as she said.

If you just want her for "just a friend", then hang out and don't kino her at all or give off any IOIs. I personally don't see why you want to go this route, but to each their own.

Like I said in a previous post. I am not really in a position to cater to an 8. That may sound confusing to some, but just trust me, life isn’t too good right now and it just wouldn’t work for very long with an 8. Plus, after I saw her power over people I started to look at the bigger picture, and quite honestly I’d rather improve my life and social group than have a short term fling.

So, as I said, I want to use her to boost my value, social proof myself and make as many friends as I can. Then later when I am in a better place in life... I can eat from a bigger buffet... so to speak. Plus I can try and get out of the friend zone later, which shouldn’t be too hard if she sees me gaming other girls and we have a lot of fun together. As far as I see it I am playing it very smart.

Still need some ideas for Friend Zone activities guys. The weekend is coming up.

Sounds like a bunch of bullshit excuses to me. Your issue isn't your way of life or being able to cater to a 8. You issue is INNER GAME my friend. She should be catering to YOU, not the other way around. Now get ur ass back in the game and score one for the home team.

Thanks for your point of view... although its not helpful... You don’t know my situation, so don’t assume that it isn’t an issue. I understand what you’re trying to say about ‘Inner Game’ but it doesn’t apply here.

Also I think you misunderstood my use of the term ‘cater’. I don’t mean that I am going to buy her stuff and kiss her arse. I just mean that I am not in a position to game her for a long period of time... Its best not to think about it.

So again I’ll state that I am looking for any suggestion for locking myself into the friend zone. Idea for activities this weekend would be great.