I Became a world-class asshole



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PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 2:02 pm 
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Through my journey over the last 2 years I learned the things to say and get women in bed. And when it rains it pours.

Then I had a girlfriend, which on the surface looked great, she was an emotional wreck half the time. After I explored other options, she never trusted me, and I couldn't have cared less about her.

I had all the power, things were done on my terms, I genuinely didn't care about her.

After that I started putting my own success as my number one priority.

And now co-workers see me as an asshole who only cares about his own success, I have no interest any going out with them to drink, party, or participate in non productive activities. I was at the store today, and these 2 girls were standing behind me as I was going up the escalator, and mumered "asshole!"

Wtf, they have never talked to me before, or even seen my face, and they know I'm an asshole.

I've become a monster, sure I have nice things that make me happy (Porsche 911) But at what expense?

I met a few girls that are friends of friends and went out to lunch with them, and was baffled at how stupid these women where and had no grasp on how the actual world works. Their biggest concern was which new flat iron to get. I'm 22 and girls my age don't have a clue, but think they know everything.

People just seem to annoy me, they don't have a drive to learn how things work. From things like:
The law, they get a ticket and assume there is nothing they can do about it. I have never paid a single ticket in my life.
Relationships: they rather talk about how much their life sucks rather than doing something about it
Taxes/investments/401k: Not a clue

I'm interested in how to start my own used car dealership. I've read books, dmv codes, and the requirements. Anyone who I talk to says it's easy to open your own store, when in reality they have done zero research on the subject, and can't tell you the first requirement of opening a shop

I'm 100% honest with people, and this hurts me alot. Although people have come back to tell me I'm right, and they're sorry they doubted me, but still think I'm an asshole.

I guess I'm like Dr. Drew on loveline without the ph.d, but an asshole with little patience.

I suppose this more of a cry for help than anything.

Words of wisdom, or advice I am open to.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 3:36 pm 
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mr. grumpy 22 year old needs to learn how to live a little and not take things so seriously.



Go skydiving.


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 5:23 pm 
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I went through your stage a couple months back, and all I can say is that it kicks ass. Nobody ever kicks a dead dog(Dale Carnegie), people are going to continue to resent you and think your an asshole. In my honest opinion, if you don't need them, ignore them and continue doing your thing.

One piece of advice though, and here's analogy so you can see it better. When your driving 120mph, you only have a chance to pay attention to very few things, the car ahead of you, your grip on the steering wheel, and maybe the car beside you.
But when your driving 20mph along the same road, you get notice things you never got to see before, things that were impossible to see when you were traveling at 120mph.
Your life is traveling right now at 120mph and all your seeing is people calling you an asshole. Slow it down a bit, and you might notice a few people who genuinely like you.

Salem,

Sam


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 8:18 pm 
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Hobbit, your pretty right. I do think I know a lot. But everything that I think I know I have read in a book, or seen. Credible sources only.

I've been skydiving, not a fan, it hurt my face and that's about it

I have trouble slowing down. If I'm not productive, I feel like I wasted the day.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 10:19 pm 
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Being thought of as an asshole is a detriment. I'll put that out there.

People get in your way on purpose because you're an asshole.

The way I see it so far, you have some psychological issues still.

You're pissed at the 22-year-old girls who don't know anything. Why would you be pissed at them? Either A) You're jealous of their ignorance, because now you know "everything" any you have lost much of the bliss in your life or B) You were socially conditioned in your upbringing to observe a fast-paced life and hate others who were slower than you.

Now. The flip side of the coin.

Behind every successful person is a pack of haters. But, there is a line. I would read "How to Win Friends and Influence People", simply because that will correct any parts of your nature that are undesirable, and will leave behind the part of you that makes you you.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 10:34 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
I'm 22 and girls my age don't have a clue, but think they know everything.
This should read: I'm 22 and girls my age don't have a clue, but I think I know everything.

That's the ultimate source to many of your described problems.

I'd say this was very accurate and well nicely put. Well done, Hobbit, for saying what I felt but couldn't put into words.


Quote:
, your pretty right. I do think I know a lot. But everything that I think I know I have read in a book, or seen. Credible sources only.

Might be picky here and say, if you notice you said 'everything that I *think* I know', if you can say you only 'think' you know it, then perhaps you shouldn't be forcing it on others as fact or truth...

...adding to this, even if you DO 'know' it is the truth, then theres no need for you to force it on others. Why do you need them to believe too. Isn't it enough that you know? If you drop the whole correcting people/being right/hating people for not meeting your expectations, then you will go far in life.

One of the important factors in Charisma is forgiveness. ...if someone cuts you off to talk about themself, let it go. If someone isnt as intelligent as you want, let it go. etc etc.

You seem to have anti-charisma, and seem to wish to still be you with all your knowledge, yet you want people to like you.

All you need to do is stop being right, and stop being 'above' others.

"The reasons why rivers and seas receive the homage of a hundred mountain streams is that they keep below them. Thus they are able to reign over all the mountain streams. So the sage, wishing to be above men, putteth himself below them; wishing to be before them, he putteth himself behind them. Thus, though his place be above men, they do not feel his weight; though his place be before them, they do not count it an injury." ~Lao Tzu


Love

~Finesse

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Munroe: "I kinoed the hell out of that goat"
Jav: "bashing chodes 24/7 ftw"
Slywalker: "Neg the bagel"
Slywalker: "I had a 1yr old GF when I was 19"
SS_Trunks:I asked her for an extra pen, confidently....


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 10:38 pm 
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Quote:
I would read "How to Win Friends and Influence People",
I'd highly recommend this too.

Some of what I tell you is likely influenced by things I picked up from that book. I also think it uses that Lao Tzu quote to demonstrate one of its many (superb) peices of advice.

_________________
Munroe: "I kinoed the hell out of that goat"
Jav: "bashing chodes 24/7 ftw"
Slywalker: "Neg the bagel"
Slywalker: "I had a 1yr old GF when I was 19"
SS_Trunks:I asked her for an extra pen, confidently....


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 11:57 pm 
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Maybe trackjunkie is over compensating?


It happends alot in self-improvement.


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 10, 2010 3:06 am 
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Oh man I've been where you've been, Im rite your wrong and you know and have the confidence in your answer. First off no one cares that much, second showing your rite makes u look like a dick, and threatening. Thats why some ppl act stupid on purpose so ppl can feel rite and it feels good to be around ppl you can tell are wrong, plus they love the attention.

Do this: Stop being right no one really cares except you. relate to ppl not prove them wrong(except in certain AMOG moments) your talking down to them and ppl dont like that feeling.
Let these ppl live in ignorance bc ignorance is bliss.


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 10, 2010 7:42 am 
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Being smart is: proving your own right
Being wise is: seeing the right of others.




It sounds better in dutch, but hopefully you get the point.


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 10, 2010 8:50 am 
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haha that's funny you mention that book, my dad gave it to me in the 2nd grade.

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 10, 2010 11:08 am 
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Trackjunkie, you are not alone.

If you are on the road of success keep it the way. It is a very natural temptation to downplay yourself to make the people around you feel better, Don't do that

Keep yourself with the right kinds of people who have similar ambitions.


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 10, 2010 12:14 pm 
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Quote:
Trackjunkie, you are not alone.

If you are on the road of success keep it the way. It is a very natural temptation to downplay yourself to make the people around you feel better, Don't do that

Keep yourself with the right kinds of people who have similar ambitions.
It's got not nothing to do with downplaying ones self. But has everything to do with not making people feel inferior - Especially not as a consious effort.



Love

~Finesse

_________________
Munroe: "I kinoed the hell out of that goat"
Jav: "bashing chodes 24/7 ftw"
Slywalker: "Neg the bagel"
Slywalker: "I had a 1yr old GF when I was 19"
SS_Trunks:I asked her for an extra pen, confidently....


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 10, 2010 12:19 pm 
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thank you for that last post, I went out tonight, the first time in months, and see my ex gf at the bar, and all her friends. So weird, I never go to bars, nor does she. she text me after, not having talked with her for a year, it was nice to feel my phone buzz with a girl on the other side.

Anyways I was thinking why i dismiss people so quickly. I have a great read on people. The last girl a friend tried to hook me up with I was able to tell after 4 minutes of talking with her, and her actions she had been sexually abused. So 5 minutes into talking to her I straight asked her when she was abused and who it was.

It's things like that, that make me think "why spend any time with emotional wreck, to invest that sort of time, could be spent actually enjoying myself"

People lie alot, especially about their worth, and I notice trends all these people are lying threw their teeth.

The only person I have an actual relationship with is my dad for his wealth of knowledge amazes me. So instead of going to the clubs friday night and sleeping all saturday I go to bed early and wake to spend time with my dad on saturdays.

I learn a lot of things by experiencing them first hand. Starting a business/website/day trader accounts. I try to be the most credible source of information and as non bias as possible

I've taken a few course on human behavior, and child development and the more I learn the more I diagnose or analyze people which nobody likes.

All the guys on the porsche forums wish they never got married, and it's a terrible investment, plus with divorce so high they'd rather be racing. Maybe I should try that road.

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 10, 2010 8:07 pm 
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I have read Hobbits answer which was very good.

But i would like to tell you what i think your problem is.
Maybe point out a few things about the person you have turned into.

A typical modern day man typically going out spending, comsuming going on porsche forums talking to the same robots about shite.

The answer is simple.

You have no spirit.
Spirituality is key.
When was the last time you did an act of kindness for anyone.
Prayed or visited a church etc.

And know i am not going to bang on about religion talking about god etc.

That is not what i mean.

But YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

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Its all to easy.

I want to be a tree!


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