I've realized something which really seems to work well for me. I thought I would share... (note that I use this only after I have met with her at least once and trust/comfort has been built. In most cases I've already kissed her too.)

I have found that it is far better to NOT make plans with a girl to get her over to your place, and to rather spontaneously call her up at the moment you want to see her and tell her to come over immediately. Screw making plans the day before or even that morning/afternoon, do it the very SECOND you feel you want to see her. I noticed the following with regard to why this works...

- Shows a very confident and dominant nature. Without making it sound like a booty call, calling her up and telling her to come over immediately shows that you have JUST thought of her at that very instant and as a result have spontaneously decided to call her up on your terms, to get what you want, and to get it now (not necessarily sex, but just having your invite request fulfilled). You don't get more dominant than that in terms of an invite. It also conveys that you KNOW that she would rather be with you right now rather than continue doing what ever else it is that she's currently doing. And you do not ASK her to come over, you TELL her.

- It re-frames the interaction by making her shift her plans around yours. If you make a plan with her in the morning/afternoon for her to come over later on that night, well you'll probably receive answers like, 'yeah well im not sure what im doing later, will have to let you know later' etc etc. And lets face it, if she has game she will try to make herself sound unavailable even though she may have nothing to do later...you dont want to play 'availability' mind games with her, what a waste of time. Whereas if you call her out of the blue and tell her to come over immediately regardless of what she is doing, if she wants to see you, she MUST (and will) drop her plans on the spot if she wishes to see you, simple as that. Skips mind games and possible flakes altogether and gets down to business from the get-go. There is no room for her to say no to you, else she loses out and she knows that.

- The very fact that she is making an effort to come over will cause her to backward rationalize that she MUST like you if she is prepared to drop her plans on the spot in order to see you. (i wouldnt have noticed this particular point if it was not for reading DiCarlo's material. Good stuff)

- The fact that you are calling her up and 'demanding' that she comes over shows that you are used to calling up girls and having them AGREE to dropping their existing plans to come see you. This is powerful. It is an indirect form of pre-selection, it also demonstrates high value as you are conveying that girls in the past have chosen to spend time with you rather than continue doing what ever else they're currently doing. An inexperienced guy that is not used to girls AGREEING to his spontaneous invite is not going to issue this confident, dominating and spontaneous request in order to see her. She knows this.

- Because you're calling her up AS she entered your mind and you felt you want to see her right there and then, the spontaneity and desire to see her will be conveyed during the call. A good thing in my opinion...the words passion and impulse come to mind.

- Its an exciting and fun surprise for her. There has been no time to anticipate what your meeting is going to be like...its fresh, its new, its SPONTANEOUS (which in a girls mind = FUN). Once you tell her to come over, she has a few seconds to decide whether shes coming over or not, if she's into you, she WILL come. She has no time to think of reasons not too.


I may have over-lapped a few points here but hope this helps a few of you who are currently battling to get them round to your place EXACTLY WHEN YOU WANT THEM THERE. I do this on the weekend a lot when girls are clearly out and about with their mates, and I have got them to leave what ever party/club they are at and come to my place after a 3 min phone call. Its nice to know that I am more entertaining than a party/club filled with her mates and other guys....and its because I know I am.

Cheers,

What if she's busy and says no?

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Walk Hard

If shes 'busy' as in currently partying somewhere with mates and wants to stay there, you could (as a last resort) tell her to carry on having fun with her mates and to come to your place in say an hour.

If she is busy as in working, tell her to come after work.

If she denies the above 2 requests, chances are she doesnt want to see you (especially if she doesnt propose another time...which is not REALLY what you want anyway..you want her there NOW).

Think about the last time you really really liked a girl...it wouldnt take much persuading to get you over to her place right?

Keep in mind my post assumes you already have at least SOME attraction.

Vision this aint a flame buddy, i usualy enjoy and agree with your posts, however i just cant see how this works...? Say she had other plans or other things to do, you could be completely discrediting a good number close. Surely its just a better idea to throw out the idea that you are going somewhere with a few mates and it would be good to see her again or make actual plans the day before or something?

Regards Saint

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Attraction is the insatiable desire to be irresistibly desired

I wasnt clear with regard to where in the process I would use this...

I have already had at least a 2nd meeting with the girls I do this with. Most of them I have kissed already too. They are not 'fresh' number closes where no trust has been built eg. the last one I have seen twice already. Also, if they have been to your place before hand this obviously makes things a lot easier. You almost want to make the request sound as casual as if it was directed at your girl friend, where you just KNOW she wont turn it down, its just what she does. ie. comes to your place when you ask her to.
Yes, if she is a fresh 'lead' where no 2nd meeting has taken place yet, trying to get her to drop her plans where ever she is to come over to your place would be a tall order (not impossible though). You should basically be at a point with her where you are confidently portraying the following... 'I know you f*cking want me and that you are prepared to drop your plans for me in order to see me. I want to see you now, therefore you must come over now.'

Right ok i understand a little better now. Im still hazy with it but hey i wont knock it till ive tryed it so its going in the black book for this week

Have you ever had a girl semi willing, but then she has pulled out like she is scared? Like it intimidates her that she is so willing to let you be in control of her so much?

Regards, Saint

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Attraction is the insatiable desire to be irresistibly desired

No, because I will only do this once I know she trusts me (I will try this on a few 'fresher' leads where there is less comfort/trust and see what happens...Im sure I will get plenty flakes)
Well its not like Im shouting her down telling she needs to come to my place or else Im going to beat her, I am simply telling her to come to my place in a casual and confident manner, this is what conveys the dominance. Which females LOVE.

I would say there need to be 2 things present for her to agree...

1. Trust. (she wont feel scared/nervous if you have this)

2. Attraction (she wont want to stay at the club with her friends if you have enough attraction and shes been waiting for your call after a 2 day freeze out, I mean what a pleasant surprise for her right!)

Rite i feel ive grasped it now just wasnt quite sure at the start

By the second thing i mentioned, i ment second resistance. Like i call first resistance a shit test/slight anti slut defence. However more often than not i will find that a girl will be kissing me and say something like "I can believe how close i feel to you, it feels like we have known each other for years!" "Is that strange". Its almost like an extra validation.

Dont you get that or is it just me?

Regards, Saint

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Attraction is the insatiable desire to be irresistibly desired

OK, now post us a word for word of what you would say

Hmm i wouldnt put ASD in the same boat as a shit test. shit test serves to size up your character. ASD is to protect her social reputation.
if she's saying that to you in the beginning stages (day 1 or 2) i would say you've built great rapport with her. keep doing what youre doing. she is extremely comfortable with you which is great.
I don't memorize/plan what i say, and IMO you shouldnt either! i call her up, have a bit of a chit chat to see what she's up to...and then just tell her to come over to my place. If i do sense some resistance and im not THAT close to her i will tell her she can come over if she promises not to take advantage of me (jokingly ofcourse), and that we're strictly going to be watching a movie and that she shouldnt get any idea's. if she says she cant leave her friends then tell her to come over afterwards, but not too late else you'll be asleep. if she wants to see you she'll hurry her ass believe me. its ALL depends on your past interactions with her, if you did a good job, she will come. the most common response ive had so far (maybe 4 times) is, 'are you sure you want me to come?' i reply saying 'no dear im only asking you in order to exercise my bloody vocal cords, so I'll see you in an hour then?

funny enough with the last girl, her drunk friend grabbed the phone out of her hand and asked me why she should drop her friend off at my place and what i 'want' from her friend at 1am in the morning. I said 'look ive been wanting to see her all night but our plans changed so we werent able to, ive just got home from club x and havent seen her all night so thought it would be nice to see her, she'll be safe [friendsname]'...she responded 'aawe thats so cute, i'll drop her off now' (this one had been to my house before, but not alone). point is that her friend was the obstacle/resistance, not her. she wanted to come, but i had to get the friends approval (which is fairly common).

If they have been to your place at least once before, youre going to get less resistance, obviously. if she has come over before and youve slept with her before...she's all yours.