Next month I am attending a workshop in New Orleans. I am 20 years old, and just moved back with my parents a few months ago. Does anyone have any suggestions as how to explain what you're doing to them. I vaguely just told them I'm going down there with some friends to party, but I think they know something is up. If I just honestly tell them it will be kind of ackward, and I know they will not understand.


On a change of subject. I got into a discussion with my mom about how in today's society mother's raise their sons to be wusses and lower their value to women by being a nice guy. She thinks you should be a gentlemen all the time. Where do you draw the line? Do you open doors for women all the time every time? Do you carry their luggage when they get off a plane. Just how much of a gentlemen can you be without coming off as needy/DLV?

I told her that women dont like men like that. They do on a conscious level, but on a subconscious level they like alpha men, not beta men who succumb to every woman's need. She obviously didn't understand....

You can go as far as you want with it, as long as it is congruent, and your doing it becuase you like helping, but not becuase you want something from her.

Needy- needing something.

If you are doing it to impress etc similarly if your not doing it to impress, I'd say thats needy behaviour, although the former is more common.

I tried to explain it. Turns out itd be harder than I thought. They assumed that the community was just an idea in my head, that rye lee who i had told them about (Im going to his workshop) was just a pidofile who would take my money and manipulate me into thinking that his tactics do work.
The hardest thing is actually trying to make them understand the size of the community. And that were not just a bunch of guys, scrounging for drinks off of girls, using greasy and cheesy chat up one liners. I tried to explain that I had no friends or success with women whatsoever, which they already knew, and all of a sudden i was walking in with hbs all the time. They said it was all in my head.
Careful how you do it. You dont want them thinking youve been sucked into a huge scam.

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V1V

V1V, why don't you let them browse the forum?

I think that would give them a better perspective of what scale this is on.

Think I didnt? Lol. Luckily enough for me they went straight for my oral thread, and how to get better at it, and said they didnt want to see anymore LOL. fuck it itll be ite.

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V1V

Joe19 are you a man?

Seriously if you wanted your mum's permission to do everything I bet she wouldn't let you leave the house, let alone sleep with women.

In the Game of the reproduction cycle, its like a game of Rugby (a UK sport). The ball is always passed backwards, its never thrown forwards.
Who cares what your Mum thinks, she's had her time, now live yours.

As far as explaining yourself, you've got nothing to prove to your friends, family members no-one- itd your business and nobody esle's- (except for the girls you'll be meeting in the near future )

There's so much wrong with this post... "It's your business and nobody else's" is the dying cry of people who are about to lose their friends. Most people have friends who they can trust. If your friends call you out on something and you can't explain it to their satisfaction, maybe you should rethink what you're doing. Surrounding yourself only with people who validate every decision you make and won't question you when they think you're doing something wrong is bullshit. This isn't about appeasement or getting permission from your friends and family. It's about accepting advice and guidance from the people you trust and thinking carefully about your actions when you can't explain to them what you're doing.

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Some vices miss what is right because they are deficient, others because they are excessive, in feelings or in actions, while virtue finds and chooses the mean.
Aristotle, Ethica Nichomachea

Thanks for reminding me of that Fin. I had kind of forgot about that concept, but that would of been a good way of explaining it to her.

I told my brother about it, and he said the same thing about how it could be a scam. I think im just going to keep quiet and let them figure out on their own. I come from a religious family, and if I tell them my goal is the bang as many girls as possible they wont be too excited.

hehe yea mate I came from a religious backgroud too.I tried to explain my PUA journey to my parents and they were neutral about the whole thing i didnt care what they thought anyway i just keep my fame solid and moved the conversation onward.

Being brought up religious ive tried to justify why i want Hot girls and not ugly ones and this is my explaination.For me a hot girl always draws the best out of me she is a fun challenge and I bring my best traits foward, her attractiveness matches the efforts ive put into self improvement.I have tried to date girls im not attracted to and I feel terrible and I hardly even txt them back and thats not fair on them.

It's a "Self Development Seminar"

If you need to explain it further, tell them it's about evolving yourself and learning some skills in speaking publicly, getting over anxieties of being center of attention, reading body language and suchlike, and basically getting a deeper understanding of the human psyche, human communication, and such.

There's plenty of things that you'll learn... Getting women and getting laid is only a motivator for learning these skills.

So sit down, think about the areas you'll learn about, like body-language, non verbal communication, holding people's attention, bonding (cheesy), basic and advanced communication, conveying yourself, some psychology perhaps, some theory about emotion, etc.

I'm sure you can add to the list....


For those following up, please help list a few abilities you'll learn through the PUA learning process...
Think back to the different forms of knowledge you've attained and so on


Cheers!

once you start sleeping with lots of woman your mom with be proud of you.
and btw its quite a big shift of paradigm to tell them about PUA if they dont understand it give it sometimes, its like some guy suddenly tell you that the world is not flat back in few hundreds years ago..it cant be soak in that easily.

I agree with the, "It's my business, stay out of it!"

Unfortunately, you moved back in with your parents, which grants them a certain amount of privileges when it comes to know what's happening in your life. I would've left it alone until they asked and when they finally did, I'd just tell them so they don't think I'm on some drug binge. If they ended up not understanding, mostly they won't, simply ask them to accept that it's a decision you chose to make, because you believe that it will make your life more fulfilling. If at this point they're unwilling to let it be, screw them!

Remember, no one knows and wants what's best for you, but you! Our friends and family may love us greatly, but they want what's safe/secure for us.

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Look back to yesterday, remember all the things you'll regret? Come back to the now. Think about tomorrow, how many regrets do you think you're going to have?

.....

Your mom ain't going be proud of you cause your with lots of women. She's going be proud of you because your BEING a MAN, and your growing up. Though you'll always still be her boy regardless.

On a sidenote to the question directly:

Tell them....they are your family, its not their buisness but it is. And lets be real "pickup" is fucked, just call it self-improvement & being more social.

I think pick up will evolve. it isnt too bad off yet