Remember when you got your first number close of a cold approach?
Take a second to think about it.
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Do you remember how awesome that felt when she handed over the number?
Once again think about that feeling.
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Do you remember when you were getting better at pick up and confident, then a chick for the first time in ages refused the cold approach number close?
Think about that for a while.
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Do you remember how gutted and slightly baffled/angry you were feeling?
Take a second to focus on your thoughts at that time.

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What I want to encourage, is not the right mindset for PU specifically, but the right mindset for learning or performing any skill.

I want you to think like you did in the beginning, where every number close and successfully opened set made you feel like number 1 cool guy, and the rejection didn't matter, I want you to become confident (like yourself in the second example) about your abilities, without setting yourself performance expectations all the time.

People need to realise that when you have minimum expectations and for some reason things go bad, it damages your self esteem, and it puts unnecessary pressure on yourself, which is bad for PU and anything else you apply this to.

By adopting the learning mindset of a student we encourage a low-pressure environment in which we work, we refresh our love for the small victories in PU. It allows us to be open to change and new fresh knowledge, it allows us to reassess ourselves.

By adopting the confidence of a master, we further our abilities and our motivation/self esteem in the field we practise. While avoiding the pressure of the expectations set by a master.


This mindset applies universally to all aspects of life. I hope people agree...

Sounds cool. Only one problem on my end, I never went out just for number closes. It may sound weird, I know, but a number is cool but I can't remember going out for just number closes. The way I saw it, and again, this may seem crazy, is that a number exchange is just an obvious part of picking a girl up. Hmm, dammit. You've got me thinking now. Once I start thinking, I can't stop!

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Coming soon in a country near you!

It's just really to point out how big you see small things like number closes or K closes etc when you start out. It can be anything you enjoyed about PU when you started off.

I like it Fin, that's a good way of thinking.

The number close is a checkpoint of sorts. It doesn't mean you've "won the Game" but it's the first hurdle you have to get over. It means you've either convinced a girl that you're high value enough that she wants to continue getting to know you, or that she respects you enough to not want to damage your self esteem by saying no (although we don't let this affect us, right?)

Here's another way to think about what Fin is saying: In a cold approach, a girl knows nothing about you. She is not making a personal statement on you when she rejects you because she has no way of knowing who you are after 5 minutes, 15 minutes or an hour. She is rejecting your Game, not you as a person.

Thought about another way, this is the program telling you where you need improvement. YOU have not been rejected, your Game has. It should be thought of as a learning process. You don't get upset and depressed about yourself as a person when you can't beat a level in a video game do you? How is this different?