Hey guys....i think i've come to the realization that feeling confident...smiling..laughing...being involved in multiple conversations at once makes me feel guilty.

To be honest...i guess i've never liked people envying me or seeing me as "luckier than they". I can look back through my entire past and for some reason each time i would rightfully be rewarded for my efforts(football) or just now at work(having multiple people stopping by to say hello and each trying to have a conversation). I feel guilty b/c the person i'm sitting next to has to watch this and i know thoughts of envy go through their mind and then i feel ashamed of making them feel of lesser value.

I'm assuming their thought process b/c that's how i may feel if someone of higher value was owning up a room, like lesser value than this guy which isn't a good thing. I'm not saying i turn to hate the guy...it would just personally make me feel not AS worthy.

Anyone stuck in this loop of breaking through "i am awesome and everyone knows it and i can't help but be it"??? It sounds very conceited to me and showboats are a defiant pet peeve with me. Thanks for reading.

I know what you mean, I get the same feeling sometimes, especially around VERY AFC guys who can't seem to figure out what they are doing wrong. In the end, however, you do deserve what you get because by studying and incorporating portions of PUA into your life you are working for your rewards... Just my thoughts...

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Time to go to work...

im the shit you better recognize haha yea why would you feel bad?

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Life's an Art

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fu ... =382875915

Google "parts therapy" it will help you understand with the emotions your experiencing. I had a similar problem when I started becoming really solid with women and a lot of AFCs develop unconcious beliefs at some point in their lives that they are just to expect rejection which conflicts with their new beliefs.

"A client experiencing an internal conflict is an excellent candidate, as might be evidenced by one who says, “A part of me wants to get rid of this weight while another part wants to keep on eating!” The personality part desiring to reduce is in conflict with another part wanting to overeat. This might be the result of one or more of several common causes: overwork, unresolved personal or family problems, past programming, unresolved past experience, secondary gain (such as protection from opposite sex), authority imprint, self-punishment, etc. Sometimes parts therapy is indicated after using ideomotor responses to questions to the subconscious about the cause(s) of a problem, especially if the responses indicate a “yes” for self-punishment, secondary gain and/or internal conflict."

In order to feel better about yourself, you should give them some advice (without coming off as cocky) in order to boost them up. Give them advice on how to use their mojo.

-Mojoe

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topdrawerexperience.blogspot.com

man, i feel the same way sometimes too. sometimes in a room of people, i will have several people begging for my attention, and then i will start feeling bad. it was never like this for me before, so i feel like i dont deserve to be the center of attention. seriously, what have i done to deserve this than anyone else other than read up on having good body language and behaving like an alpha?! jeez

You are feeling guilty about having a good time?

Are you harming anyone? Are any of your actions malicious in nature? If no. Then you're worrying about absolutely nothing.

if it makes you feel better, you can try to include those "VERY AFC guys" in some of your convos/activites-- if you're alpha enough, girls & your other more dominant male friends will follow in suit -- if anyone gives you crap about it, just say that you're trying to be a nice guy and include someone who you feel bad for [its good if girls know that you can show some emotion!]. there's absolutely nothing wrong with being empathetic.

All these lessons work at each other.
If you made lesson 3 your welcomed at number 4.

Life Lesson 3: Personal Growth

initiative develop Vs feelings of guilt

Trait: Target consciousness

Ability to Imagine and Feelings


Life lesson 4:

Perform diligence Vs Not Worthy

Trait: Comptence

Ability to Know, Learn and Work Together.


There are 8 of these lessons if you would like to know all of them.
Just send me a PM, but your struck at lesson 3

I have a different but related feeling towards my becoming of a PUA. My whole life I have hated people who are trying to impress me or are show-offs. I hate cocky ass attention fiends. I hate narcasistic deuchebags. I hate condescending assholes. Most of all I hate fake or superficial people. And although I find myself in a persuit of satisfaction with women, I do not want to be THAT GUY.

Alot of the PUA methods seem to ask this very behavioral modification of me. I have grown to like and accept who I am over the years but now I come into conflict. My current personality and/or social status cannot sustain the women I need to feel satisfied with life.

It seems all I can do is soak up what I can and apply what suits my personality. I try not to ever make myself into somebody that I will feel guilty about being. In fact, I try not to do ANYTHING that makes me regret who I am.

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Its not the material-----Its the Execution

Nice replies guys and it's nice to know that i wasn't the only one experiencing this dilemma. "I want/do feel like the shit, but yet don't want to DLV others at the same time". I know in attraction you must make yourself appear more valuable then they, but it's still uncomfortable to make someone feel like a lesser person, for me atleast.

Style was making a really good point I think in an interview I heard him in where he said that the greatest social proof is not to care about your social status. Its a sign of low worth when people feel the need to prove their 'shitness' by things like putting others down. Its an even greater sign of low worth when people accept this putting down by others and retreat. The best thing to do is to show unconcern about your social status and treat everyone with decency.

He gave the example of someone bumping you on the street. The middle status alpha guy will act offended and try to make it out the other persons fault. The low status guy will react to this by apologizing like it was actually his fault. The high status guy will just not care one way or the other. If the guy tries to act offended he'll just be "yeah man, sorry" like its irrelevant one way or the other.

The way you find the highest status guy is by seeing how someone acts toward those of low status. The high status person will be friendly to everyone from the doorman to the executive. This is becuase he is at such a high status that it doesn't even matter and he can give it away freely. He's transcended the system of 'shitness'. This is the most attractive person. The really popular guy in school was always the guy who made everyone happy and feel good about themselves regardless of who they were.

Your being the shit is best exemplified by being kind and decent at all times.

i agree completely with what you said
use the techniques and methods that suit your personality and morals
there's plenty of stuff that I choose not to use because I've felt the same way about overly cocky arrogant jerks

you have morals man; i like that

ur a good person

WalterWoods, you put it exactly. The best thing to do is to be friendly to everybody. Even if you don't really like them. And don't talk shit about anyone else, it will come back to bite you. It feels amazing once you surpass the social class system. Not caring what other people think about you is a DHV, but when you are friendly towards everyone you won't put anyone down.