I was having this talk with my best friend, a girl, who has often fallen for the wrong guy. She knew me when I was a nice guy and still sees me as a Good Guy (rather than a nice guy).

Here's the first thing:
Bad Boys Have the potential to do something great in life, but they don't have the direction.
Nice guys have the direction but they don't have the balls.

A woman doesn't look at a man and say, I can give him the balls. She does look at a man and say, I can give him the direction.

Nice Guys aren't really that nice. They're dishonest. They're not clear with their intentions. And they get mad when a woman doesn't catch on to what they want. They come on this board and complain that women want bad boys.

Bad Boys and Jerks and Assholes, display a unique masculinity at first look. The problem is that it's a pseudo masculinity. It falls apart. That dominant personality that is so attractive, is actually possessive and needy, and eventually that becomes clear. That self-value, don't give a damn attitude, is actually don't care about you.

The Bad Boy and Nice Guy are the same person, they're both needy, self centered, and unclear with their intentions. One gets girls and one doesn't.

There is a middle ground. The Self-Assured Man. This is a man who knows who he is, what he has to offer, and goes for what he wants. He makes no apologies for his desires, though, he always respects the women he is with. He can be gentle and caring when it calls for, he'll do romantic gestures, but only when a woman deserves it. When she has shown herself to be investing in the relationship in an emotional and physical way. He never goes first. But, like any gentleman, he opens and holds the door for the woman to travel, leaving her no doubt that he'll follow her. At all points, he guides the relationship, letting her know what the feelings are, and letting her know she's safe and respected at all times. He isn't humble, but he is respectful, he isn't always agreeable, but he is open minded. He pushes his woman's buttons because he's not afraid of her emotional responses, but, he never does it out of personal insecurity or anger, but, through a sheer core of purpose and real disagreement. He challenges her and enjoys her challenging him. Any woman he is with is better for being with him, and he is only with women that make him better for being with her.