So I'm out for sushi last night with an HB 9 I really dig, and lo and behold in walks in an HB 8 that I'm dating and have hooked up with. Granted, I haven't seen the HB 8 for a few weeks, but we definitely are still dating. Anyways, she arrived with an older man, and the two promptly sat at the bar after walking right past my date and I. They were situated in clear eyesight of us, and though we never acknowledged one another, the HB 8 kept peering over in my direction. From the body language of her and her date, I got the feeling they were just friends...though who really knows. Soon enough, I paid my check and left with my date, having never openly acknowledged the HB at the bar.

My question is, how can I spin this situation to my advantage. Its possible (though not definite) the HB 8 was losing interest in our relationship. Even if she wasn't, I don't feel like I am a priority of hers in her busy life. Therefore, I feel randomly appearing in the same restaurant with a date more attractive than her (and her arriving with a guy that I am more attractive than) DHVs me to the extreme if I am able to handle this situation well. I do enjoy hanging out with the HB 8 (though not as much as the HB 9) so if at all possible I'd like to keep seeing her. Basically, I feel that if I handle this well, I can come out looking great and reinvigorating the HB 8's interest in me. If I handle it poorly, then I would look like a player scumbag in her eyes.

Anybody ever experience a situation like this? Anybody have any solid advice?

-Esperanto

well . . i have never experienced anything like this and i am sure LA and Doc or someone on here can give u better advice than me . . but let me try to entertain you for awhile since no one else has written anything

what i might have done is when i say her walk in try to bring her into the original set like you and the HB 9 . . introduced them to each other and then moved on into the separate dates from there that way it still lets you have a presence . . . .


so how can you spin this for your advantage . . . its a tough one but if ur not talking to the HB 8 then u probably should get in contact with her . . hopefully you didn't do it right after you saw her because it might seem needy but i would still see her for sure they always say that jealousy plays a huge role in the game and you can work with it . . . so you could even try that angle thats why they say if u have a chance to bring 2 girls to the party who u want . . bring both and see what happens

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You have to practice during the week for that one that counts on the weekend

You've definitely got jealousy going and some preselection set up for the HB8 that saw you.

Definitely, I agree contact the HB8, but don't be needy.

relax. you are in a very good situation for yourself. dating doesnt equal relationship.

i say you should have said hi at least to the girl who walked in but oh well. cant change the past. the next time you see her, say "did i see you in x bar the other night?". then go from there. the other hb obviously has other options thus is going out with other guys because in her mind she is the shit. she then sees you unaffected and out with other girls. in her mind you have become the higher value person. if she still holds interest at all with you, she will think higher of you. social proof right there buddy. just dont get affected if she tries to turn it into anything. always just say "hey i dont have a girlfriend. all i was doing is simple dating and enjoying my tuesday night". you dont need to explain yourself as you are not doing anything wrong.

keep it up, keep your head up, and this is a plus for you!

Oh, we can end this thread. I'm no longer seeing the HB 8 but I'm still seeing (and digging) the HB 9. But as a side note, I have a TON of respect for the HB 8. I went on vacation for a few weeks and didn't keep contact with her, and for that reason I had a suspicion that she might be seeing someone else. Regardless, I called her when I got back, and she called me back same day. We chatted a while and I asked if she still wanted to meet up, and she said she was seeing someone exclusively. I told her that's great (and meant it, I'll tell you why in the next paragraph) and she told me I left my shirt at her place last time. So we arranged a pick-up and I got it back. I'm sure I'll see her out again and things will be very cordial.

The way this HB 8 handled herself should be a lesson to all women who want to look mature and confident. She returned my calls promptly, with no games. When she was seeing someone new, instead of awkwardly making up lies or avoiding the issue, she told me how it was and I truly respect that. The shirt exchange could have been awkward, but it wasn't because neither of us made it awkward. This is how dating should be. Sometimes things work, sometimes they don't, but if you act mature and realistic, you can have a great time with someone and avoid a lot of bullshit. Half of the info on this forum would be unnecessary if more HB's acted like this one.