| This belongs in general questions, but to look at it more theoretically, I'm not convinced the reaction itself is the problem. Would the girl rather a guy was disinterested or even repulsed? I think it's the way we learn to handle the reaction that's the issue. As an analogy, some people get treated badly and lash out violently at others. Other people instead turn the anger in on themselves, sometimes even to the extent of self-harming. Anger and lust are perhaps comparable as they're both natural impulses that society encourages us to regulate very carefully, sometimes to our own detriment
The problem here is that I think some of us immediately and instinctively turn our attraction responses inwards, turning them into a problem that we need to handle somehow, rather than simply treating them as a fact of life, and something to be appreciated and not ashamed of. Like the self-harmer we would rather cause ourselves pain and frustration than direct our impulses outwards and end up hurting or even just inconveniencing another person.
One of things I love about the shock and awe technique is that it completely reverses this emphasis. It says to the girl, albeit playfully, that if anything the problem leading to this response lies with her. How dare she inconvenience you and disrupt your day by standing there looking attractive? What the hell is she playing at?
I think that because women are responsive to your frame, if you don't feel okay about your attraction to her, there's just no possibility that she will. However if you treat your attraction towards her as a fact as inevitable as the tides, something you have no control over and therefore couldn't possibly apologise for, and even go as far as to blame her for the disruption, then you're on a very different footing.
Hope that's of some help. _________________ If something's not fun, it's not worth doing
|