Hey guys, I have just joined the forum and its great to meet all of you on here.

I want to share something with you guys that has interested me for awhile. Do you believe that going after the girls you 'really' want from your true intentions, you will get better success with in pickup? if you know about projecting that positive, attractive energy from your state within and feeling good from the interaction, you will know what im talking about.

Me and a friend of mine were out on Saturday night practising pickup wingman style, and so anyway my friend jumps straight into this set as he was pushing his comfort zone and building momentum. He begins talking to one of them and I was immediately stuck with the other one which was about a 4/10. Now when I say 'stuck' I mean I thought, fuck it, I have to use my time somehow and talk to this other girl whilst having no attraction towards her at all before moving on.

So I begin by literally talking to her with no enthuisiasm whilst projecting no real energy towards her in the conversation. She responded back a few times by asking me 'where im from' 'what am I studying at uni' blah blah blah and in between silences I stood there and looked around the room into space whilst checking out the interaction between my pal and the other girl. After a minute or so she runs over to her friend and tries to pull her away from the interaction between her and my friend whilst looking at her friend and shaking her head miserably as if to say "im not feeling this, lets ditch them"

Now ten years ago I would of crumbled at this response and attached myself to the outcome. But instead I instantly knew that she was not in my true intentions to want to pick her up and could see that her response was a back out of an interaction that had no attraction happening between us, not a rejection of me 'personally'. The more I practice pickup, the more I am recognising this because it is strengthening my personality.

Now in contrast, picture this. Back in October I approached this really hot blonde girl at a beer festival on the Friday night. I mean I wanted this girl and knew I could have this girl and approached her with true attraction and brick wall focus. Guess what? the interaction went brilliant, my actions were smooth and free flowing, from this, the assumption stacking, compliments with true intentions, gentle teasing and everything were projected naturally and she was totally centred on me.

The point to my story is, when you go after the wrong girl to give yourself ongoing validation and she rejects you then this is most likely because you are projecting false intentions because you dont even want her in the first place. She will feel this and will want to break away from the interaction.

Yep. It's that mystery ingredient some call "chemistry".

_________________
Jazzy Jeff: "My love for you is like a river,
Like a summer breeze that makes my soul shiver,
One look from you is more precious than gold,
Let's grab some BBQ and go get busy!"

Intent is a main principle that guys should learn in pickup before tackling approach anxiety. I think guys can create this connection by knowing what they want, true to their intent as its described. Problem with the way chemistry between guy and a girl is described, is that people have often used this word for many years to describe something that happens by accident, I mean drifting through life and just letting this shit happen without control over which girls guys pick right?

I thought this issue would be interesting for guys getting into pickup because since my younger years when I didn't understand and initiate game properly, I would go for the wrong girls to validate my ego and more often than not, the interactions wouldn't work out because my true intent in what I wanted wasn't there no matter how much I tried to maintain a good interaction.

Yea, I totally can relate to this. One thing to avoid is trying to open/close sets that are less than what you are looking for. I realize that in this case you were stuck with a fugly friend because you were winging, but it results in the same thing.

I opened a three set once and my target was the hot asian in the middle, but instead of her turning around, only her two ugly friends did. I had a weak open and they blew me out before I got a chance to talk to the cute asian. It sucks when you can't even get blown out by the girl you liked.

I've reconciled this by realizing that hot girls have been interested in me and that if I try, I can get more hot girls in the future. It doesn't matter what ugly ones think of you. Ugly girls will blow you out just to make themselves feel like they have the power of selection. If you can, avoid giving them that ability. Go for the girls you want and leave the rest for the AFCs to squabble over.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn

Very true, the ugly girls often love to gain that satisfaction by rejecting a higher value guy just to avoid being rejected themselves, they even intervene aggressively sometimes into your space because they cant get what they want. Avoiding them as much as you can is the only real solution unless they are the cock block friends which are obstacles to be overcome. I used to aim average but now I aim for the attractive girls to gain the true, more challenging experiences of game for further improvement and enjoyment whether the interactions go good or bad.