I just want to share with you an embarrassing story of how taking the pua "rules" too far made me look like an ass. Feel free to make fun of me once you read it, I brought it on myself

It was to do with the theory of preselection and how it is the most powerful attraction trigger. If you're seen with attractive women, then you become attractive right? I work in an IT department supporting a retail department store and I get to talk to a lot of pretty girls and have made friends with a lot. Anyway on Christmas we had a party for the whole store and I thought this was a good time to get a lot of pictures of myself with pretty girls and put them up on facebook. I thought that would give me preselection for life as anyone who facebook-stalks me would think I'm some sort of pimp.

Anyway during the party I went round mingling with every pretty girl I knew at the party and afterwards casually suggested we take a picture together with my digital camera. At the end of the night I was so proud of myself as I had pictures of myself with around 30 different pretty girls. The next day I uploaded all these photos onto an album and posted it on facebook. And yes, I didn't put any other pictures on there, in my stupidity every picture was me with my arm around a pretty girl. It had all the subtlety of a sledgehammer and it didn't occur to me for one minute that it would obviously look like I was trying to hard to impress.

The next week I came in arrogantly thinking all the guys at my work would be in awe and the girls who see my facebook would think I'm some kind of player. But the whole week nobody said anything, I just noticed a lot of sniggering in the background. At the end of the week my office was going out for drinks and I didn't feel like going. And then one guy cracked "come on, you can even round a few girls up and start taking pictures!" and the whole office burst out laughing. I could tell they been holding that in for a while

Afterwards I saw how obvious it looked that I was trying to hard to impress and how that would not impress anyone. I stole a few neutral pictures of the party from my colleague and filtered the pictures through the album to give it more subtlety. I have to put up with a bit of humiliation for a few weeks but the lesson has been invaluable. From now on I'm just going to work on my inner game. As the great David Deangelo said "work on your inner game, and the techniques will take care of themselves"

Haha, I love it. I can totally see that happening. When you blatantly do things that are interpreted as showing off, people will hate on you and make fun of you. It's just how it is. And they only reason they made a big deal about it is because they saw the before and after process which made it very easy to tell what you were doing.

But I think you lost your perspective a little bit here. You were posting those photos to give your Facebook page DHV status for girls you meet in the future, not to impress your coworkers. Your coworkers don't realize that what you did is simply a practical means of attracting women, much like getting a new haircut and ironing your clothes. They don't understand DHV nor do they care about you being able to attract women more efficiently. To them you are just some goofball who thinks he's cool for having pictures of himself with pretty girls on his facebook page. However, I do understand where the embarassment is coming from.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn

Haha ah these things happen, yes inner game is important more than anything else, as that will secure you a lot of things in life, not just getting laid. However small techniques that are taught by mystery etc, can give you some pointers and help in some situations.

I understand what you're saying, but don't you think it would be equally easy for a girl to see from the pictures that you're trying too hard? I think my problem was the lack of subtlety. I think I was just following the "rules" too stringently, like for every picture of myself with a pretty girl I get a preselection "point", and the more preselection points the better. However sometimes when you take this formulaic approach to social situations you come off very unnatural and make yourself very transparant.

However I'm glad my colleagues laughed, because that let me know I needed to be more subtle. My female friends tell me that women are professional facebook-stalkers, if they're interested in you they will ransack your profile. So maybe the best place for DHV pictures is subtle ones here and there in your albums.

Well yea, I think you probably went over the top. The thing is, whatever it is that you do, it has to make sense. As it relates to a DHV-filled facebook profile, the pics have to validate your DHV status. If you are just an average guy with one picture album of you and 50 different hot chicks at one party, that doesn't really make a lot of sense. But if you are some club owner or promoter and you have pictures of you at a bunch of different bars/clubs/events with random hot chicks, that still makes sense, despite being ostentatious.

If you walk into a club with 4 hot girls on your arm, that's DHV. But if you go around telling sets that you are there with 4 hot chicks, then that's just bragging, and it becomes DLV. That's basically what you did. You took a DHV thing and made it too obvious and showy in an obvious attempt to get people to think you are cool. But you had the right idea, thin out the album with some other non-babe related photos to make it less obvious. Also, keep getting photo ops with girls at different locations and post those as well. That way over time it looks like you are just this baller who is always hanging out with hot chicks getting his picture taken and having fun.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn

What's funny is once you get your inner game down, everything else just falls into place. I seriously knew stacks and stacks of routine and openers when I had week inner game. Once got inner game got solid, I stopped using those routines and openers, and now I dont even remember.

If you would have posted more group pictures with you, a guy or 2, and 2-4 girls it would have been more natural. The problem is you ended up just so focused on what other people think, this alone makes you appear as though you are pretty self orientated, this isn't an attractive feature.

The goal should have been to post pictures of you having a good time, this is attractive but posting pictures of you with a dozen and a half is ridiculous, it shows that you are entirely too focused on perception. When you take pictures of having fun, it shows you merely capture moments of you having a good time. The key to a good picture is to capture moments not looking for perceived value. Good pictures illustrate far more value than pictures with attractive women.

Too many people have too big an ego around here. Why are you even worried about trying to create value? Just be high value, it's when you stop trying to be this "high-value" guy and just gain a self-confidence and high self-esteem that you actually gain true "high-value." If you run into a person who has a sense of aura to him it isn't because he is constantly worried about trying to demonstrate value, it's because he just doesn't worry about that shit, he is good at being him, comfortable with himself, his status in society, and his direction in society.

I don't post shit on my facebook, to me spiritual ego(worrying about what people think about you) is a bad thing, and Facebook is a promoter of a huge ego. All my friends who have self-confidence and high self-esteem are rarely active on facebook. They have too much shit going on in their life to be worried about telling everyone. I know I don't really post on facebook but once every other week or so, sometimes I go a couple of months.

While I agree people who are attracted tend to facebook stalk, it really shouldn't matter, you can say some some pretty mundane shit and a get a reaction out of attracted people. Look at girls for example, they can post the stupidest shit and get reactions from 12 guys.

Stop worrying about your Facebook perceived value and you'll action appear high-value as long as you illustrate attractive behaviors that don't appear ego orientated. For instance when I post on facebook it is normally a wise statement or conclusion I've drawn at moment, basically a thought, not pictures or what I'm doing, it simply a statement to me nothing more. Which do you think looks more interesting something that has substance or something that shows you are ego orientated (look at me and how cool I am doing this)? Something of substance illustrates value far more than you may realize, it shows intellect, wisdom, maturity, self-confidence, etc. Which is a lot more entertaining that a picture of you with a few cute girls.

For the record I used to be focus on outer value (nice car, stuff, cool room, tv, etc.) , but when I focused on gaining inner value is when I began to get really good with women. I understand how much more attractive someone who isn't obsessed with that becomes (they are more gracious and thus far better to be around than someone in constant status wars).

Just my thoughts on facebook and values... take 'em or leave.

Peace and Love,

Vic

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Just another guy from back in the day.

Blogging again living life: http://www.Scienceofnaturalgame.com

Agreed ten times over.

I thoroughly agree with what you're saying poeticlyskuac. I did something dumb here and I learnt my lesson. A quote I found really interesting from David Deangelo was that the great irony of life is that when you care what other people think, they tend to think worse of you - and vice versa.

That will be the last thing I post on facebook. I was too much into this "perception is reality" thing and thought if I created a good virtual life, it wouldn't matter what my life was really like, it only mattered what people thought it was like. I've now learned that's not the case, and that trying to impress people is a losing game as people want to think less of you.

But, and I'll quote my favourite pua David D again, success is a horrible teacher and failure is a good one. Maybe it took a fuck up like this to set me on the right track. I'm already thinking 2013 will be a much better year for me.

To be honest grizzler, I didn't really feel the need to add much to this thread (but thought vic's paragraph I quoted above was something that needed to be flagged up because of how right it was).

You seem to have already learned the lesson here, and more importantly in my opinion, you seem to be able to laugh at yourself about it a bit and post it up on here to give others a bit of a lesson as well. That - and your answers to the rest of the thread - suggest to me that you've already improved both yourself and your 'game' because of this scenario.

I suppose the only other major thing I could say to add anything to the thread is that your scenario is a great example of trial and error. The best way to learn things isn't by reading on this forum - it's by going out and practicing it. It also shows that even if it goes a bit wrong, the actual end results aren't really all that bad!

Good luck and I hope you have a fruitful new year

I agree that if you invest in facebook as a form of social validation, then you are just trying to feed your ego and seek approval, which is inherently flawed. I was under the impression that the OP was just using his facebook page as a tool to help reinforce his image of being high value, that way he passes the social proof test when women cyber-stalk him. If that is the case, then it's fine.

I don't give a flying fuck about facebook, and I didn't even create an account until I started doing pickup. That being the case, I don't have many pics or friends on there. The last two girls I've been with are facebook junkies (like most girls) and I'm sure they scoured my profile looking at every single picture and word that I wrote. They've even commented as to why I don't have more pictures and why I don't post more, essentially DLVing me. This just goes to show that the OP had his mind in the right place by trying to "beef up" the DHV status of his facebook page. Girls WILL check it and they WILL judge you based on the images and commentary they see there.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn