Hi everyone,

After reading some texts,I realised that I have no clue how to respond to a girl when she disqualifies herself. I have a couple of examples. Keep in mind that these are just parts of conversations:

Me : Hey! Doing anything cool tonight?
Her : Studying!
Me : That's not even cool!
Her : Haha I am not coolll
Me : Too bad for ya little girl

Me : Yes I did my best to be productive! Workout + accounting now my body and brain are dead!
Her : haha awesome! you'l sleep like a baby now
Me : I wish you were here to tell me a bedtime story so I could sleep better!
Her : haha you seem to like nightmares
Then I didnt answer

What would be the best answer when a girl says something like that? Maybe the girl is fishing for compliments but I still don't know the best answer. I think the first one was pretty good (but I should have added a ;P) and I should have answered to the second. What do you think?

_________________
The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.

Three options.

1 Pierce through the bullshit.

"Yeah, you know, girls always say these things like ´I am nothing special´ or ´you are such a great guy I don´t know what you see in me.´ But if one digs beneath the surface it is always false modesty, and they have a high opinion of themselves and respond with a lot of fire against criticism. If you truly felt that desperate then you would be all over me right now, wouldn´t you?"

Best used if she keeps up this self-defeating unarousing, distant-keeping bullshit after you have invested a lot.


2 Play and be creative.

"Ah, but nightmares, as terrifying as they might be, are also thrilling, and add that tinge of beweirding excitement to our inner lives. Without the thrill of nightmares, our imagination would succumb to building dreamworlds that eventually grew placid."

Best used if you choose to assert your dominance over the discourse and not recognize her self-defeating bullshit intention.


3. Warm-hearted reframe.

"And, for you, I would rather have a nightmare where I am kidnapped by you than being kidnapped by aliens."
Can add, if you feel like this chick can take it and be playful: "Although, admittedly, the two can be hard to discern at times."

Best used if you feel like charming her.

1. Way too long to text. I get the idea but I'm not sure if calling her out on that would be the best option...
2. Still too long but I like the idea. It's like saying "I'm not scared, I'm actually excited about that" right? I like that stuff, but I would have to make it shorter!
3. The best of the three by far. Where I am with this girl is more a seduction SPAM. I would definately add the second line for some push-pull.

In fact, I'm wondering if there is a general way to answer to self-disqualification? Should I :
1- Tease her by amplifying what a girl would say? Example : "Yea you're SOO not cool! I bet you'll end up as a librarian!
2- Being a complete AFC and say "No You're the most interesting person I know!"
3- Avoid the subject and completly change topic?
4- Add yours!

_________________
The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.

Well if you dont have any money to write some erudite text...

However, total AFC is just: hehe.

Okay, "you end up as a librarian." Awesome. Except beneath their self-loathing there is always deep narcisism so this will make the girl angry.

Ignore the point. Best. However this is short term lay the girl. In long terms these self-defeating bullshit casters cant be used for relationship material because every day, every hour you will have to maneuver your way out of these situations where one wrong word will lead to a fight.

"That's true but I don't like saying things directly to people, it can be mean." (write jk if you aren't playful)

"Not cool? What are the qualifications of cool?"

"Me neither, but this guy told me what it was like once."

"That sucks... You want me to tell you what it's like?" (jk if you aren't playful)

"Sure you are, didn't your Mom tell you that once?"

"You're not cool either? You want to join us mathletes?"

My style is to usually be quite playful, it is best through text, making her smile is the easiest way to get a meet up. You just need to be playful, make the conversation interesting. Be different with your response, don't provide the same thing any other guy would.

If she is trying to play herself down you can level the playing field, it also depends where the conversation is and what she seems to be feeling. She may simply be looking for a compliment (something women do with regularity), she may feel down, but most of the time all you need to do is joke with her and you change up the tempo of the conversation.

Peace and Love,

Vic

_________________
Just another guy from back in the day.

Blogging again living life: http://www.Scienceofnaturalgame.com

Girls who actively disqualify themselves usually aren't interested or have issues. If I really like a girl who's disqualifying herself, I focus on generating interest. But most of the time, I just let it go and save myself the hassle.

_________________
To download the 53-page Manual of Confidence for FREE, visit my blog
Why Men Suck at Sex (fun read) - LINK

Hey guys, I could really use your help here. I'm really at a turning point with this girl...

Even with all the efforts I made, with all the girls I gamed, with all the knowledge I earned about pick-up... yesterday I realised that I have a one-itis with this girl. I still game several girls at the moment, but when you have a girl who is good looking, who gives you attention, but who is also one of the most intelligent girls you know, it's sometimes very hard to avoid this.

I say I have a problem because I see my game (only with this girl) getting weaker and weaker every day. Usually I don't really care if a girl likes me or not, but I don't know where I stand with this chick and it's starting to drive me crazy. For example, I hug her from behind when she's talking to a guy she friendzoned a couple of month ago and I tell the guy "Look at that, she's crazy about me!" while making sure that she hears it. Her answer? A really soft "I love you NorthBoy"... If only it was a boyfriend/girlfriend "I love you" I would be happy like hell, but I just feel like it's the kind of love like I love my friends or I love my uncle.

All this to say that she said something about some other guys that messed me up. I'm pretty sure my reaction at the moment way pretty good because I kept my frame. The reality is that I had A LOT of trouble sleeping that night.

Fck I don't how to behave with her anymore. This one is girlfriend material and I don't know what to do guys... Please don't tell me to game other girls because I'm already doing it without any problem . It's just that everything that this girl does affects me and causes me to overthink everything

_________________
The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.

I know that feel, bro. Try to be chill and distract yourself. Chances are, if you keep doing what you usually do, you can get her. But if you keep worrying about shit, you'll screw it all up (I've been there).

Just remember....

There are other girls who look just as good. Are just as smart. Feel just as right for you.

I've met TWO girls who were literally like my second halves.. PERFECT for me. Usually people spend lives looking for ONE soulmate, but I met TWO in the space of just a couple of years!

I had great times with both of them, but things just didn't work out because that's life. But the main thing I learned is, nobody is unique. Do your best - that's all you can do. If you screw up, not a big deal.




To keep it totally real with you though, I'd probably just tell the girl how I feel. "I can't stop thinking about you, bla bla bla"... Of course, that kind of shit works for me because it fits with who I am, but at least think about it!

_________________
To download the 53-page Manual of Confidence for FREE, visit my blog
Why Men Suck at Sex (fun read) - LINK

Judging by that interaction it seems like you want to be her friend. That's cool if that's what you're looking for. Some of the posts above have good material in them. However, if you're trying to fuck then get things sexual fast. If you get rejected then it was most likely never going to happen anyway.

The most valuable thing in life is time. Make most of it.

Every successful person knows this.

100% on board with this! You need to get sexual, women like sex.... Stop being a pussy, she already has one. Be the cock she needs, you acting this way is helpful to being friends not dating a girl. If you want to be her boyfriend you better get sexual quick, otherwise you are going to hear that almighty statement "let's just be friends". Start joking about sex, but let it be an underlying truth, rather than a joke.

Peace and Love,

Vic

_________________
Just another guy from back in the day.

Blogging again living life: http://www.Scienceofnaturalgame.com

I obviously don't want to be only friend with her. I could not stand seeing her hooking up with other guys.

I understand your points guys. Honestly, I tought that doing kino would be enough. I did pretty much everything I could think of except kissing obv and I'm starting to realise that you might have a point. In fact, just yesterday I was about to hug her before I left and just grabbed the girl next to her to make kind of a three-way hug (I know the 2nd girl pretty well too). I said seriously (even though it was obviously a joke)

NorthBoy: "Hey girl let's have a threesome someday! That would be cool".

The second girl kept silence but the girl I'm refering to said playfully :

Girl : "Oh we should really get another man!"
NorthBoy : "whoa you haven't even seen the equipment yet!".
Girl: "You should show it to us right now!".
NorthBoy : "Haha maybe tonight who knows" (I'm really not sure of what I really said)

Is that the kind of humor you're talking about or is this too direct?

_________________
The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.

While I'm here let's just add some details that I wish I never said.

In this interraction I went too far. Usually I joke a lot about everything and I'm not too serious, but I don't think it's the way to go in order to become dating material. I don't remember what the conversation was exactly but I remember saying these statements:

NorthBoy:
"Can you imagine, I see it (my dick) everyday in the shower! Can you imagine that?"
"Haha I'm joking you've probably seen better since you're from africa. ;P" (stupid and useless stereotype DLV, wtf brain! ->I'm white)

Then here's my recovery attempt over text today:

NorthBoy : "Hey Miss (her last name)! Tonight You + I + hot chocolate!"
Her : "Sounds like a date! im meeting a friend I havent seen in ages tonight though. Lets do it another day? And hey, we are going for Korean bb on monday for your bday, call anyone as you please "
Northboy: "Ohh you look so scared ;P and hey some school stuff came up so I'm not even free today lol!"
Her : "Scared? Of course im scared! Haha so soon"
Northboy: "Haha so soon? I feel like you're taking ages by pretending that you're not crazy about me eheh!"
Her : Lmao! I was saying "so soon we will go for hot chocolate"

Then I tried to end the conversation to limit the useless texts.

_________________
The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.

I think you're developing oneitis bro. You're going in to all this detail. Who cares. It's 1 girl that you haven't fucked yet. Quit over thinking things.

What you need to do is talk to more women, it will answer 99.9% of your questions.

Getting nervous before talking to female strangers is a bitch, but start with baby steps. Walk around the mall (or wherever) and start with just a "Hi" every girl you pass. Then "How's it going"... then maybe a "How you've been"... next thing you know it you're confident as fuck and saving numbers.

EDIT: Oh and it seems like you're too focused on having a fun time with the girl rather than sticking your penis inside of her. Having a fun time is great, but remember your main goal ALWAYS.

What do you guys think about that? I've thought about ita little bit, but I'm really not sure that it is the solution. Of course if she's into me it saves a lot of time and if she's not, well I won't waste my time. At the same time, she might not be into me but there is still some potential. I'd be in a bad position because it puts her in control and she would be likely to stop chasing me since she knows that a sure thing. Moreover, I'm actually trying to install a good frame that SHE is the one chasing me...

_________________
The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.

And how's that working out for you?;)

In the end, you can't insulate yourself against failure. To get the girl, you have to accept the possibility of losing her.

You're an attractive young man. You don't need magic tricks to get this girl. You're already good enough without any frames or anything else, don't be afraid to be yourself. What you're doing right now is called paralysis by analysis. Just be yourself and hit on her in whichever way you feel is best!

_________________
To download the 53-page Manual of Confidence for FREE, visit my blog
Why Men Suck at Sex (fun read) - LINK