I've been taking a lot from this forum, asking tons of advice and such, so I figured it was time I made a significant contribution. I have been doing a lot of texting lately, since I have gotten a few # closes, so I experimented and came up with some general rules on Text Game. Yes, I know a lot of people do not like to text, because it is impersonal and hard to make commitments, and convey sarcasm/personality, but I think that there is a lot of potential with texts. Here's what I compiled.

TEXT GAME

Text game is not wildly different from phone game and day/night game as many rules remain constant. However, there are several notable rules that are essential.

1.) Keep all of your texts short and simple, yet get across your complex idea. The main idea is quality over quantity.
- No one wants to read a long ass text, so keep it concise. Get your point across and leave it at that; do not elaborate on any unnecessary ideas. Things you would normally say in a conversation cannot be said via text, because you cannot have more than 160 characters to people with other services than you (obviously if you both have Verizon, you can talk a bit more).
-Let them interpret what you are saying. This adds an aura of ambiguity (I love alliteration ) to yourself. You don't give away all of your ideas, you don't mix words (decisive) and leave somethings up to the imagination; you create mystery. You are a challenge.

2.) Do not abandon your Cocky & Funny personality for fear of not having your sarcasm come across the right way via texts. Just make sure that your sarcasm is clear and easily interpreted. The last thing you want is an angry response or worse, no response at all!
- So use C&F, but always think to yourself, "Is there any way that this could be misinterpreted?" If your answer is yes, alter it, read it out loud or add. . .

3.) Smiley Faces!
- Some guys do not like to use smiley faces because it is emasculating and overly feminine. Some want to leave their sarcasm up to interpretation, and if she doesn't understand it then it's her fault. In my opinion, if she doesn't get it then you did something wrong. If you don't want to alter what you originally said, add a simple winky face at the end of your sentence so she knows you were kidding. If they still don't know you were joking, then neg the hell out of them, because they cannot take a hint. I have never had a joke taken the wrong way with the use of a well placed smiley, but I have made mistakes without them.
- Italicize, Italicize, Italicize! This is also a great way to convey sarcasm for those who refuse to use smiley faces. Just be aware that if the person you are texting doesn't have the same service as you, it won't show up on their phone.

4.) Opening/Initiating Conversations can be tricky. You want to make sure they remember you, and you want to rekindle that attraction you created that may be lost. (sounds a lot like phone game, doesn't it? )
- So, if you have created any inside jokes, have nicknames, or anything out of the ordinary, put them in the first text. This will remind her who you are, and why she liked you, thereby getting you back into comfort. One thing I do, is when I exchange #'s I put mine in her phone, and make it creative. They will usually not check what you put in front of you, so she will have a laugh later on. Also, this name will come up when you text (or call) her, which is good. I have an example of this, but first. . .
- Openers! They must grab her attention! People can easily blow off texts, more so than phone calls, and as such you need to make her want to respond. I've found that any normal opener that you would use during day/night game works fine, as long as you didn't use it on her already (this should be a no brainer). Make sure it sounds congruent to your personality and make sure you give it the proper context in the first text, or you will come off as phony (yes, girls can still tell over the damn phone whether or not you are being real or not).
- Some obvious "don'ts" of openers:
Do not just say, "Hey it's me, so & so, what's up?" You will just get the obvious, socially programmed response of "Not much, how bout you?" This is an interview question, and will bore the hell out of her, unless you really left a good impression on her.
Do not ask her how she has been or how she is feeling (unless you have created sufficient comfort and close enough to her to actually receive an honest response outside of the socially programmed "Good")
Be interesting, dammit! I cannot stress this enough (even though it is obvious). If she is bored she will ignore you, and she will not text you back.
- Here's an example of an opener I used that was well received:
Soma: Hey BFF! Me and my friend Chelsea were having a friendly debate and we need an outside opinion: who lies more, men or women?
~ This works because I called her my BFF when I met her, to false disqualify, and put my name in her phone as Super Sexy BFF. She got a kick out of it and later put her name in my phone as, Lauren=Sexy ~
- Here is another great text opener that I take no credit for. It has been posted before but it is the shit and everyone should know it! Here is an actual response I got from using it:
Soma: Stop!
HB: Stop what?
Soma: Stop smiling and thinking about me. See, you're doing it. . right. . . now.
HB: Oh, you caught me!
~The hardest part of texting, at least in my opinion, is openers and the initiation of conversation.~

5.) Mirroring during texts??? Yes, it is possible.
- Since you cannot mirror her body language, you should (you don't have to) mirror her text style. If she uses lots of acronyms (like OMG, lol, ttyl) use them as frequently as she does. Do what she does, to an extent (use judgment here). I texted this one girl who used exclamation points after almost every sentence. Until I realized she did this out of habit, I thought she was always super excited to hear from me (that, or she was on cocaine). I ended up mirroring her, and it helped building rapport.
- You can also attempt to lead, but I haven't really gotten much results from this yet and I don't know if it works the same as when you are in person. Let me know what you think of this idea!
- Make sure your spelling and punctuation is correct, and for god's sake, use commas to separate ideas! A stream of consciousness is the most annoying thing ever, and she should be able to understand what you are saying without thinking really hard about what you meant to say.

6.) Play hard to get - be a challenge
- Say you are going to text her back later, then don't. If she asks why you didn't text her back, tell her something came up or you were busy. Hint that you were doing something better and forgot.
- If she ignores you, do not get angry! Your best option is to ignore it. If she later apologizes for it with something like, "Sorry, I was busy eating dinner" just say something like, "Oh, I didn't notice. I was busy doing *blank*, so no harm done". You could also just ignore it and change the subject. Do not say something like, "If I didn't know any better I'd think that you were ignoring me" because you come off as needy and you give her all the power. Remember, you are living in your own reality, and she is just a guest in it. Never let this turn around. Your best course of action is to wait a day or so and then text her with a new opener and start over. If you get ignored, either something really did come up for her, or you did something wrong (most times they will let you know if something came up).
- Be persistent and giver her the benefit of the doubt.

7.) Check for IOI's
- Like in a conversation, you can check for IOI's in the same manner. The best way is to stop texting her and see if she texts you again to re-initiate. Normally people fall into the pattern of, she responds, you reply, she responds, you rely. One for one. You can break the pattern to see if she gives you two for your one. If she does, obvious IOI. If she doesn't (wait around 20 minutes) then text her back to keep it going. Never text her more than she does you- in other words, never have two for her one (of course use judgment, and there are exceptions).
- Also, texting can take place over a long period of time, so if she responds to more than one of your texts quickly in a row, consider this an IOI. Consider everything an IOI (life is just easier that way.. )

Let me know what you guys think of this, it is just a contemplation of rules that I wish I knew when I started texting. I figured them out over a period of two months (give or take) so if you have any additions/alterations, feel free to let me know!

Enjoy!

great fuking post!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Perception is Reality

dude you are awesome, but what do you say, when it takes forever for her to text back and she leaves you super short answers?

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jeriko

Wow, this is simply something to be had and applauded. Thank you for posting such a comprehensible overview of texting to girls. I think this should get a sticky.

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i lust for jessica alba, but now since she is preggers. I am lusting for Nicole!!! It's New Year's Day. It was Ben Franklin who said, "Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man."

Honestly, I used to be a texting guy. I used to text FAR more than I would call, but I eventually realized that I was using texting as a cruch. I really recommend getting the girl on the phone. Why?

She can take ALL the time in the world to reply to a text. She may not even respond. I suggest keeping texting to a minimum.. But I really love texting while I'm at a loud party or multi-tasking.

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Say goodnight to the bad guy! Come on. The last time you gonna see a bad guy like this again, let me tell you. Come on.

Make way for the bad guy. There's a bad guy comin' through! Betta get outta his way!

I would say keep your responses short like hers and make sure yours are attention grabbing, so she'll want to respond. One that I used as a opener with this girl who always flakes (while texting) is:

Soma: OMG Guess what.
HB:What?
Soma: You wouldn't happen to have a twin, would you?
HB: No! Y?
Soma: Are you sure you want to know?
HB: Yes! Please tell me!
Soma: Well, I just met this girl at Hollister who looks exactly like you. She had the same facial expressions and everything. She could have been your evil twin. You should meet her!

The conversation then exploded after this, partly because I think it made her jealous. Keep the suspense, make her want to text you. At first, you are the one who wants to text with her and she has all the power because you initiate it. Turn this around and use texting to rekindle attraction, bild more comfort, and set up dates. That's what I use it for.

No contribution here, just applause and thanks. I text with friends to keep plans rolling with multiple people at once, so it'll be nice to take that comfort and utilize it in my game. Thanks Soma!

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- Enchantment

"A man has only one escape from his old self: to see a different self in the mirror of some woman's eyes." Clare Boothe Luce, The Women

Hey, if anyone knows any new openers good for texting, post them here! I will keep you guys updated on any new ones I come up with and any new ideas/concepts I come across.

wow, along with the few other people, i agree this is a awesome extremly in depth post about texting game.

i have only one question. Couldn't calling her your BFF be very easily mistaken as a LJBF from you too her, rather than a false disqualifier?

I guess it could, but I think it is in the right context I used it under that worked to my advantage. It is actually a more in depth joke, but I didn't want to really explain it (this post was long enough), but I guess I can now. I originally named her friend as my BFF, but because she did something wrong (I can't remember what exactly) I named her my ex-BFF and named the target my BFF. It worked really well because I had already displayed some interest; she knew I saw her as more than just friends. Plus I put my name in her phone as "Super Sexy BFF". If that isn't a hint, I don't know what is . I know it didn't hurt anything because she put her name in my phone as Lauren=Sexy, telling me I couldn't look at it until later. I then negged her later that night, telling her she wasn't very creative, lol.

What can I say other than, GREAT!!! I WANNA HUG YOU! This post is all I'm ever gonna need when working girls with my cellphone.
/R.O

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"Life's a bitch and then you marry one"

Good post - I was thinking of putting some texting rules together because I like to think that I am somewhat of an expert on getting from texting a girl to closing them (with a lot of practice):

The only things I would add are -

Keep the frame - i.e. make sure you don't slip into the friend-zone, avoid bull shit friend-chat

Make each text count - use the fact that you have time to think about your messages count, don't fluff your lines like you could face to face. Make sure she replies by asking interesting questions.

Steer conversation onto topics which you can:
A) Show DHV of yourself
B) Easily ask her out / compliment her / keep the frame

Artichokable. Mirror what shses doing and do the same thing back to her. Like mystery said dont jump through her hoops make her jump through yours. Remember "It's not about being a jerk to women... It's about being nice to yourself". [/quote]

OK some stuff is correct, other stuff is............ ......meh?


1. Keep things short you got it bang on, however aliteration etc I'll have to try out (Y)

2. Why the fuck do you have a separate personality? Thats just not healthy , Personally I'm not a fan of throwing up a mask and secondly sarcasm when done to make a serious point, tends to look negative and does not say anything great about the person who is being sarcastic.

3. I love smiley faces, it's playful nothing else, once again it comes down to who you are but good work covering both sides of the argument. And we've already discussed my stance on sarcasm.

4. You can be interesting, by being interesting, I always ask how are you or what have you been up to, and women responded positvely, becuase as far as they are concerned I'M FUCKING HOT

Honestly if she's into you enough to be serious about giving you her number; the fact that you asked her how she is, as opposed to some obscure question about penguins, will not matter at all.

5. Mirroring is fun, but I tend to use it very briefly when I need to establish rapport quickly, moving sets in day game etc. You may be on to something, but it could seem a bit out of place, for example I rarely abbreviate and even my texts are well punctuated for the most part. It would just seem wierd of me (after seeing my personality) for me to go "C U L8R BBS LUV U X LOLOL TTLYL"

Alot of people who know me would notice it quickly, and I mean just known me for a day or so.

You are correct in thinking that mirroring works outside of bodylauguage. However it is often debated that too much mirroring can make people wierd.

6. You can play hard to get, with negs across the phone by not picking up etc, but thats something specefic to the indirect styles like MM, but the advice of play hard to get may not hold true with other styles of PU.

Have you tried stuff like GWM or "shock and awe"

Regardles, by all means be playful.

7. IOI's in general are very loose and ambigious, contradictory to what MM teaches etc. Most IOI's, are really vague, and it does take more than a check list to see if she really is into you.

However my list of general things to look for on the phone is,

How flirtatious she is, how quickly she responds, who is calling who, is she trying anything to grab your attention etc (One I have been getting recently is girls telling me that they are just out of the shower)



It's a decent post, I myself wrote something a while ago, I'll see if later on I can link this thread to it (Y)

Good basic guide lines. I think its important to come up with your own "style" while texting. Like for me, I dont give a shit so much about proper grammar and the spellings of certain words. Ill use tho=though ur=you're/your, etc. I dont like most apostrophes because theyre old fashion (creative writing degree so suck it)! A lot of time I will strictly reply with straight smiles/sad faces, whatevers appropriate, this is risky as you must have confidence she will reply back. Also its important to never be overly anxious. And when I notice she is thoroughly engaged, my replies will become shorter, as now I've hooked her, this consequently positions her as the pursuer. This is fun, you gotta be congruent tho.

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