HB8 - 3 Set Number Close -> Pointers Welcome



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PostPosted: Fri Jul 22, 2011 7:59 pm 
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I don't recall the entirety of the convo, but basically I went to a restaurant to pick-up a to-go order and ended up opening up a 3-set of HB8s.

I sat down with them and had a good conversation for about 10 minutes. At first I didn't know which one I wanted, but I decided to focus on the most attractive one.

I let them know about a house party I was having on Friday and two of them (including my target) seemed really interested. One made an excuse and her other friend called her out for lying.

My target showed lots of interest in me, but I wasn't able to completely win over the friends before # close. I got the # close, texted today, and no response. I think it's mainly because her friends weren't gungho in support of me.

I noted specific things like my target looking at her friends about the house party and saying things like, "Well...I'm definitely not showing up alone."

Any pointers to better win over the friends and increase the likelihood that she'll respond to my texts next time? I am positive that my sticking point was the friends because she clearly was interested in me. One of the first time this has ever happened to be honest so I just want to make sure it doesn't happen again.

Also, the same night I sent her a text confirming the spelling of her name and that I would see her Friday. She texted back a positive response and corrected me on the spelling of her name as well.

- JV


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 23, 2011 6:03 am 
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Winning over her friends is probably among the top 5 objectives you have to achieve when you're trying to pick up a woman in a group.

Her friends hold the key. Not her. She's with them and their opinions obviously matter to her, hence even one 'No. Not that guy' could turn the situation completely around i.e. from success to failure.

Now, the best way I use to win over her friends is to play it sincere and trust worthy (note the word 'play'). Her friends have to be comfortable enough to think that they can 'trust' (yes, girlfriends have a left field sense of entitlement about the group) their friend around you. If you cannot seem to induce that feeling within the first 15 minutes, you are probably done for.

Smile a bit, Act a little nervous, aim to please.. it's all part of the charade.

You'll have to endear yourself to them in a way as that smart guy who was a little nervous because he wanted us to give him a good reaction. Once they feel that way, you're in.

Sometimes, if you're good enough with the friends they will intentionally or not, help you with the target. "Oh! He's so cute!" and "Give him a chance!" and such, will be thrown into the frame by them and that's always a plus.

So, keep the negging to a minimum. Give them a little compliment. Tell them you were "a bit nervous" about meeting them and they "seem like great guys". Also, if you have established a little more rapport then you could use the big guns like "You know, I think your group is awesome" and such.

Validate them and they will return the favour. Neg them too much and they will send you to hell.

Good Luck.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "


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