FR: 1/6/12; Sarging The Bookstore
Today I got out of the house a little late today and there was only a couple hours of daylight left, but I wanted to at least get out of the house and try to do some game. This is my first official field report, although I have approached a few times before and even recorded it a few times, but now I plan to be more active with approaches and to actively record and measure my progress. I suppose without keeping a binder of FR’s you will be less likely to approach. Anyways, here it is.
The first girl I opened was at the bookstore. I remember reading a few articles about how to approach more effectively and they broke it down to a few steps. I treated the bookstore environment carefully. I didn’t want to give off a predatory vibe by scanning the environment and direct approaching people. I played it cool and just walked in to look at books like a regular customer, which I am because I usually at least buy something small every other time I visit a place, and I just use my peripheral vision to notice potential approach-worthy HB’s. Also, I made sure I walk/move slowly like other people. Usually, I’m a man on a mission so I walk faster than most other people.
So this HB 6 is chilling reading a book in an armchair next to this shelf I was conveniently observing. I let myself get in the mindset of observation to see who is where and I also resisted the thought of the approach to counter any potential AA and make the approach more spontaneous. I was about to walk by her and I caught her look up real quick at me, which I took as an IOI, even though it may not have been, but hey everything is an IOI, right! So I commented on her sweatshirt saying Oxford and we’re in Lafayette, LA. I said you’re a little ways away from Oxford huh. She responded positively and we talked briefly. However, this interaction quickly went south and she ended up having a negative reaction and she was quite rude.
It’s really rare that people react negatively to me, but here’s how the conversation went down. I commented on her sweatshirt that referenced Oxford University in England. I said you’re a little ways away from there. She said something about how she visited England with her husband about a year ago, the girl looked 22 so I wouldn’t have expected her to be married. I was like oh ok that’s pretty cool. From that point I lost interest because she was married, but I thought I’d continue the conversation for another quick bit. I injected another bit of conversation and she mumbled something I couldn’t hear or I didn’t make out what she said. I asked her what was that she said and she didn’t respond. I then asked her what book she was reading.
At that point her mood completely shifted and she snapped at me. She was like excuse me I’m trying to read and her tone was kind of ugly. I was like damn! How rude are you! Although I didn’t say that, but I’m sure my expression did. All I said was oh shit and I just walked off. I went to a different isle to kind of hide for a bit cause I was feeling the sting on that one. Lol I opened a book and tried to break down what exactly happened so I could get past it. I thought about the 1set in detail and broke it down in my mind. I reasoned that I shouldn’t have tried to continue the conversation after that first part. Once I made small talk and she mentioned that the presence of a husband I should’ve ejected. Who would’ve thought small talk could be a crime. Also she was reading and I could see where I would’ve been interrupting her, but still I think she was out of line personally.
After about 10 minutes of laying low, I found myself on a different isle noticing some IOI’s from this chic walking by. She walked past my isle, then hovered around the entrance while glancing at me, then entered and lingered a bit. I inched closer while observing my side of the bookshelf like a regular customer until we were fairly close in proximity. She never once flinched or inched away like people do in bookstores, especially women, when you move closer to them. We were on the isle that had some animal books so I grabbed one of the books with a picture of a lion and I used it to open. I said to her lions are so majestic you know. She then responded positively, as if she was waiting for me to say something. We had a pretty lengthy conversation considering where we were and that we just me. She looked to be about 25 and looked pretty good too, she was about a HB6, with some tight yoga pants.
Then I notice this little girl about 10 years old come stand beside us, it was her kid. That was cool though, it didn’t phase me. I introduced myself and was made their acquaintance too. I also learned that this chic was married too, but she was completely in to me or into our conversation. She was acting like she wanted me to number close her, especially when the kid left. However, when the conversation was drawing to a close and the kid came back she was hesitant so I found a way to Facebook close. It was kind of weird because the little girl was there, but I could tell the HB wanted something. Lol
My morals wouldn’t let me mess with a chic who is married, and especially after the previous incident I didn’t want any more trouble. She was cute though. Maybe if I Facebook her we could work something out, maybe be friends or something or maybe not.

The Lesson Learned:


I felt like responding hatefully, but I really didn’t want to escalate things. I could have said, “Wow, that was rude!” to acknowledge her behavior and so I could have the last words, then stayed in the immediate environment to own my set. I believe this would have made me feel better. Or, instead of responding by flight and/or by “Wow, that was rude!”, I could have smiled and laughed a bit and said “Wow” then stay in the environment a bit longer to “shop” and own my set, to assert my dominance over the environment.

However, her unexpected fierceness, caught me off guard and kind of staggered me, especially since I was just getting back in the rodeo of approaches. I guess this is Murphy’s law in action, “If it can go wrong then it will!” I was generally conflict adverse in general, I didn’t want to escalate the situation (especially since there could be a husband in the area), and I wanted to escape and break down in my mind what exactly happened, which is what I did.

I ended up going to a different isle a couple of bookshelves away and I grabbed a random book and pretended to read it as I broke down what happened. I spent about 10 min doing this until I got my steam back. I ended up opening another set and I Facebook closed, this girl was much friendlier and accepting of me, I didn’t have to do hardly anything. Why was this? Was she digging my style, opener, been generally friendly, or maybe she saw me talking with that other chic and thought to herself that I was the man and pre-selected?

Whatever it was, I accomplished my mission of not wanting to leave the bookstore with just the bad experience. I wanted a good return on my investment, even if it had to be from employees and other patrons!