Hello!

I'm new to the forums, but I joined so I can learn more. I have read The Game by Strauss and I got immediately intrested. I just finished Mystery Method video series and now I'm watching The Anhilation Method and RSD's Blueprint. Also I'm reading the Venusian art book. It's all kinda confusing, but I have sources of info at least.

I wanted to talk about the situation I'm experiencing. It's kinda complex, but if any one can help maybe you can. I'm a 26 years old student, average looking, tallish. This has some online content, but I hope it's okay.

I went to exchange to an foreign country for 4 months. I had a gf at this point, but the relationship was very disfunctional and we broke up before coming to the foreign country. We kinda got back together online later, but it was hasty. I met this girl and I certainly didn't give a good impression of myself when I saw her. I was drunk at a bar and tried to buy her a drink (yes, I know now this is very bad). I wasn't looking for anyone, so I wasn't that concerned. Other than that I was very pleasant towards her. I wasn't very well groomed if that makes a difference. Anyway, we started to talk more and after a drunk party we kissed. She just had broken up that night of one guy, but it wasn't serious. She was vulnerable and I kinda took advantage, but I was drunk too. We kissed while, but she said she just wants to be friends. Don't blame her, since I had a gf at that point.

Well after that we talked it through and decided to be friends. We started to talk a lot online and became close friends. I started to get emotions towards her and I told her I liked her online (I know, I know). She didn't really respond, but didn't shut me off either. Anyway, sometimes after a party we would kiss again, but sober we would be normal. She would not tell anyone and basically ignored the whole thing. However, I tried to pull a very clumsy kiss-close during day time and she said "I'm making her uncomftorable". In the same time I tried to get her go on a date with me and she would say no, she doesn't date. We still went out but friends. In the end of the exchange semester we started to get closer and we kissed more and more. At this point I was more groomed and dressed better. Never really in public and we kept it private. I still had a gf kinda, but it was very unclear even to me. She knew about this cuz I told her the situation. We even slept together twice, but no sex. End of semester and we remained very close and talked a lot online cuz both travelled back to our home countries.

I broke up with gf after that for good. Now she's asking me to come to her home country and I'm going because I really like her. I'm just worried I'm gonna end up in the friend zone or I'm gonna not even gonna get anything else but kissed. So I want to kinda repair the damage, and try to start fresh. I'm gonna be there for 2 weeks so I have time to play. Also we flirt a lot online, but sometime she says things like "you're not getting into my bed, you know" when the talk goes too sexual, but she says she enjoyed our makeout sessions in the foreign country.

She's very honest and doesn't seem like a player, but most certainly is playing a bit at least. I'm not sure how to approach this. I like her, and I want sex, but also to keep the possibility of a relationship with her despite we live in different countries. I just don't know how to do this.

I was thinking playing it cool. I haven't told her that I liker her anymore (online), since it's def lower value. I haven't called her princess or beautiful anymore, since I don't want to create roles or lose value. I do give her compliments sometimes, but I do a lot more negging now. This is all online chat for now. When I travel there I'm gonna keep on the negging, especially around her friends, and play it cool. Not be needy and act a bit indifferent. Like I don't even need her. This is new to me, but that's my first impression what I should do. It must be better that tellng her I love her or something..

This is a bit of a ramble, but I'd appreciate somekind of feedback. I feel I fucked it up a bit by my AFC attitude, but I still want to try to repair the damage and get laid/start a relationship of some sort.

If she is already attracted to you then you can just do some light negs and then intermittent rewards for her IOIs. It sounds like she likes you. You can even wow her with how much of a "changed man" you are after leaving your gf. Do you think it would be possible to build a frame where you always wanted to get with her but didn't pull the trigger because of the other girl? Could you make it convincing?

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You can't forget about me, stupid. Everywhere I go ima have my own theme music.

Jits, thanks for the reply. I was beginnig to worry there would be no reply at all.

I think she was attracted to me when we were in Japan, but now I cannot be sure since time has passed. In Japan, we kissed a lot and slept together twice, but no sex. She has some commitment issues and she says she neved dates, cuz she had a major relationship go sour in the past.

However, we do flirt online some, but I'm kinda new at this so I'm never sure if she's just playing or is this real. Also I'm afraid that too much talking will lead to comfort and to LJBF. Is this possible, cuz we talk a lot.

Jits, I was thinking that light negging would be really good. Can you give details about the reward thing? I'm pretty sure she likes me. Also I've been kinda doing that changed man routine, but I need to crank it up prob (it's true btw).

I think the frame is kinda of a reach, since my game was so obv in Japan. I hated that she was always calling the shots and I was following. I'd like to chance that dynamic. I'm sure that frame would be hard to pull, since I wasn't that cool back then and I stated my intent too early. I saíd I liked her and such..

Good advice, so please keep going.

So if the frame is screwed then let's go with "changed man" and "reward and punish".

First thing is you have to show her how unbelievably awesome you are these days. DHV yourself like crazy and IOD her a lot, unless she is giving you IOIs in which case you should intermittently reward her IOIs. In your first social engagement with her make your priority opening sets and attracting targets. Use your material to WOW all of her friends. This will get her atttacted for sure.

After a while you can finally start paying attention to her a little. Give a shit load of compliance tests and build a solid compliance momentum. use the reward punish system that is straight out of MM. Whenever you do a compliance test if she passes IOI her and if she fails then passive IOD her. There is a really good flow chart in MM.

At some point in the night you are going to have to isolate her. If you have done everything right up to that point then she should be really digging it. Spend the time reinforcing you "changed man" frame. escalate kino like a champ. Kclose with confidence. I am pretty sure you got this man.

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You can't forget about me, stupid. Everywhere I go ima have my own theme music.

I have to say that I understand some of the theory, but I have basically no practical experience in any of this. Also my native language isn't english, so things don't flow so smooth always. Don't get me wrong, my english is good, but not a native speaker.

Could you give examples of reward and punish. Frame sounds good.

I don't want to put her down, so I'm trying to figure out how much to IOD. I IOD'd a bit too much today on chat, so I actually had to apologize. Still learning this. I try to reward her IOI's as much as possible, but still maintain cool and not go too soft. I have this tendency to show girls my cards too early.

Im def trying to WOW her friends with the material, but I might not have the possibility to meet her friends in the beginning of the trip to her country. This is because she's gonna show me around and we gonna travel. So at least a lot of time together alone. I seriously hope all the material works and I need to start practicing it asap. I was thinking MM and Style. Opening new sets is gonna be hard, since I have a lack of experience in this.

I can do the ignoring prob, but I'd like some info on compliance tests, since I don't really understand those exactly. I know the idea however. It's to test her commitment right? IOD's are hard too..

Isolation shouldn't be a problem. Frame reinforcing is good also. Kino is a bit lacking, but I'll give it my best. Start slow from hands, to waist and then shoulders/neck --> Kiss. We kissed before, so I might be able to read her a bit.

Thanks for the confidence, man.

If you have any info or links that might help me, plz feel free to post. I have been watching the Blueprint and it's good, but I should prob concentrate on techniques instead of inner game. I have a time-constrait afterall.

Also give me your opinion if too much chat before the actual trip might damage my game. You know, scarcity and that.

Also how should I react that she never ever references to us having sex, even though we are on a close topic.

Like this, she says you can't sleep until 12 when you're with me then (playful)
I say: What if we cuddle? (playful, teasing, flirting)
She says something stupid about cuddling from different beds and taking the subject away from intimacy.

Also she might say: Did you miss my cute face (referencing to having not seen each other for a long time)
I say (still cool and not too eager, still I want to show interest): Maybe
She says: ehhh, I was kidding.

The last one was like a slap in the face and I told her that. I don't like tricks like that.

I just don't wanna travel there and not have sex/intimacy and a chance of a relationship. I feel a bit stuck, since I think about her way too much. I know what you are thinking, but I get this way with girls. Im deadly afraif that I'll get LJBF and I'm stuck with her in a foreign country.

I would keep the pre visit chat to a minimum. If she asks why you aren't taking just say "I want to make sure we have plenty to talk about in person.

So punishing with IODs is not a harsh thing. It can be as simple as acting like you lost concentration or shifting body language away from her.

Compliance tests are just simple little things at first and they snowball into bigger things. Start with casually saying "can you hold this for me while I take my coat off". I like "take my hand I wanna show you something". There are tons of compliance tests you can find online.

Be prepared, bro. Make sure you have a rough outline form beginning to end that allows for some surprises. I can tell you really want this one to work out so do your homework and make it count. How will you feel if you don't put the time in and then it doesn't happen?

IT IS CRUCIAL THAT YOU PRACTICE OPENING SETS AND BUILD HIGH SOCIAL VALUE IN FRONT OF HER EYES. YOUR WHOLE "CHANGED MAN" FRAME DEPENDS ON IT.

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You can't forget about me, stupid. Everywhere I go ima have my own theme music.

Jits, it's been awhile.

UPDATE: So I'm here and things started to escalate and things were going smoothly.
I got her into bed and everything, but there is a lot of resistance especially getting the pants away. I've tried some freeze-outing, but I'm not experienced in it. Actually, I manage to get them away, but I messed up before we could have sex. DOn't wanna get into detail, but things have been colder ever since. I lost some value and def confidence. Also I think I'm falling for her, which is awful for my mental state. I can't think clearly and logic/game is out the window.

I need/want to make her mine, but she def sees me lower value than before and I dunno where I stand. I'm just following and she's leading, which is not good. Also she doesn't want to date or have a relationship. Obv I had to be a retard and tell her I like her a lot. I have no words.. In addition she knows that some of my materia is PUA. Not genuine, so I lost trust..

I know this all sounds pathetic, but is there anyway to come back from this? I really want this to happen, which is obv very bad and result oriented, but I need to try it.

Hey, it sounds like you know what you did wrong and what you are doing wrong. I am not sure where to go from there because my skills are limited. I hope someone else get's on here though to help. You don't sound pathetic now GRAB YOURSELF UP BY THE BOOT STRAPS AND ACT LIKE A LION (even if you don't feel like one right now)

As far as her knowing some of it is PUA. Just because it's PUA doesn't mean it's not genuine. I learned how to write poetry for a girl once. Does that make it not genuine? Fuck that shit. And about being results oriented... If you have a specific goal then that is results oriented. You want this chick. Is that good for learning? hell no. But you damned well better be results oriented about this goal. Then you can be results oriented about your learning goal. Would have been better to do it in the other order but you deal with what you get.

I really don't have anything for this situation, bro. sorry. It's not a lost cause, you just need to find the right guy to help you.
Two big things you can read up on. (for future conquests)
Handling Last Minute Resistance
"NEVER TELL A GIRL HOW YOU FEEL UNTIL AFTER YOU'VE HAD SEX" one of the MPUAs said it... I can't keep them straight anymore lol.

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You can't forget about me, stupid. Everywhere I go ima have my own theme music.