So flushed with success and excitement from Thursdays outing with RedThirst, I got back to the StyleLife challenge on Friday.

The task was to approach 3x women and get recommendations for menswear shops. I had to go into town anyway for a haircut, so planned to do it after that, and before my physio apptmt.

My hairdresser is a female friend I've known about 6mths and she is lovely, so we had a nice chat about my upcoming birthday night out the next day. However the place itself still makes me feel uncomfortable. Up till 9mths ago I haven't been in salons for seven years as my LTR cut my hair for me. It seems a shallow place and the ppl working there, my friend excepted, seem shallow and bitchy. I didn't feel safe.

So the state was low as I walked out. I bought a paper and went for a coffee to try and acclimatise and find state. That helped, and I even got #1 out of the way as one of the coffee shop workers, a HB5, was cleaning near me. She went away and I thought I'd missed my chance but luckily she came back and I asked her for her reccos. Made it sound like the idea had just occured to me about 1sec before I opened my mouth. Thanked her cordially and that was that.

Ok, feelin better now, I walked out the shop and hit the street. Straight away a HB7 is coming towards me, so I smile inwardly (at how quickly the next chance is coming, bring it on baby!) and outwardly and achieve the exercise. Strong IOIs and I felt she wanted me to take it further. But I didn't, ran out of confidence / things to say. Plus we were stopped standing in the middle of a side street (albeit no traffic in it).

Next I just couldn't see any targets. There were women about but the exercise said "ask someone with a sense of style, and who looks like they are from your town" and none fit the bill, mainly on the first criteria. (mind you the waitress was in her work uniform, but even her hair and makeup, shoes etc did not scream style. #2 was not bad, 6/10 for style). I went up and down the street, even went into a shop and browsed. No targets! I needed to pee and headed back towards the coffee shop. I decided I was going to have to compromise, just then as I was at a crossing a girl I'd passed over earlier came up beside me to cross. HB6, 4/10 for style. Because she was pointed in the same direction as me It was perfect to practice Mystery's day game techniques as taught in the VH1 series. So side on as we waited and then crossed I got the question out.

She pointed backwards to some shops but i kept on walking as i needed to pee. When I did look back I saw my hairdresser friend 50m back walking behind us, coming back from her lunchbreak. I deliberately didn't make eye contact as I didn't want her to see me. My target did seem to find it weird that I was still walking beside her. I said something like "yeah, thanks very much. I just need to get a coffee into me from this coffee shop up here first though...". I'm not sure she believed me though, and we kept walking together, me chatting a bit. Actually quite relaxed tbh. But then she faltered and made a lame hand-signal and mumbled explanation that she needed to go across the road. I waved my newspaper at her nonchalantly and said thanks as she crossed the road on her made-up mission. So that was #3. I'm sure my hairdresser friend saw us, but when I allowd us to meet up another 100m down the road she said nothing and I said nothing Actually, I think if I'd acknowledged my friend the minute I saw her, it would have been good as it would have given me social proof. Also I'm sure I had a look of discomfort in my face when I spotted her (but voice was fine) and the target may have spotted that and wondered what i was hiding.

so for those wondering where is the kclose, hang in there, they're coming!
this is a journal of the past few days, been eventful
definite steep upwards learning curve going on

So I was pleased with completing the exercise and self-esteem was good on the way over to see my physiotherapist HB7. My first apptmt was in November, and that was b4 I read The Game, but I still asked her out (wrote it down) at the end of session#1. As she was massaging my knee in session#1 I got a boner on in my exercise shorts, which I'm sure she saw and I think I saw a sly smile. She seems quite a shy, clean living type, so even these types maybe see it as a compliment. Thoughts please gents? My breakthrough was not being embarrassed, but rather owning it and being proud of it. I carried on with the fun conversation as if nothing had happened. If anything it gave me permission to be a bit cockier (pardon the pun LOL), especially as I had attributed a positive reaction to her.

At session#2 I tried to nclose, but she said she couldn't see me while she was treating me, professional protocol etc. Not sure if maybe she was regretting agreeing to go out.

Anyway, today was session#3. Good chat and a bit of fun, she kept me in for an hour. I do think she looks forward to my visits now. However I am experimenting with facial hair and when I asked "so whats your take on facial hair on a man?" she said she didn't like it, so that may disqualify her. So far my facial hair is about 7-10days of growth, with no trimming or clipping or shaping. Its all new to me, so need to get resources.

So onto Saturday, the day of my birthday.

Drunk at home on my own at 4am Saturday morning I had texted my local MILF and commanded, rather than asked (which was new behaviour to me) "come and meet me in the market for lunch, ok?". I added the "ok?" to soften it, so maybe technically not a command. But lo and behold she calls me all a flutter about 11am to arrange the hook up. yeehah!

So I'm talking to a friend there who runs one of the stalls (social proof, check) when MILF7 turns up. Also the chick who sells paintings in the stall opposite is worth gaming. She's given me smiles in the past when I was in the LTR and went there with the kids. Made a mental note to develope a strategy here.

So MILF7 and I have fun, she buys me lunch and hands me a fun bday card. I sit with my knees touching her thigh and there is playful expressive kino going on back and forward under the table. This was our first daytime and sober meet up so it was going to be a challenge to escalate. Bear in mind that we are currently "just friends". Her call in response to my unwillingless to go exclusive for her, after a few dates and a few nice fks. Mind u last time I was up there for a friendly visit we went to bed together, heavy petting and a handjob but no fk. Anyway back to the here and now and when she wanted to go I walked her to the side entrance and got a nice bit of mouth to mouth. gentle, and nothing like what i get behind closed doors, but nice, set me up for the day

StyleLife challenge said to accessorize which is something I haven't done in years, so I headed off into town to do some shopping. I got a necklace and a braclet in Topman, also my first pair of skinny jeans. I am 39 today (years of age, not waist inches any more lol) so this is a brave step.

I also wanted to pick up a peacock prop: a black fluffy boa such as mystery handed out to one of the contestants as an advantage reward in the VH1 show "the pickup artist".

I suddenly found myself in a clothes shop on an elevator behind a hot stylishly dressed HB8, and because of the daygame exercises yesterday it was no bother for me to ask her where I'd get one. We got off together at the top and stood there while she went thru' and double checked complicated directions to 2x possible sources. I let it end (whyy!!!!!) and she seemed disappointed, but nonetheless pleased (she'd been approached, could tell I liked her? had helped someone out? was pleased to see a guy in this city buying a feather boa? I don't know). but she left with a very friendly and inviting "see you later".

Note to self, bring boa into shop and find her. Approach with boa saying "look, you should be proud, youre the mother of my feather boa" and remind her of conversation, or even better, do it as a cold approach and playfully see if she remembers - hehehehe

Next port of call was a clothes shop where a chick works HB6 who I met at my mates birthday in December. She is his ex and still a bit hung up on him. We flirted and I couldn't believe when at 6am she announced "normally I'd accomodate u but not 2nite". Of course she didn't want my mate finding out, and it would look bad on her. I said nothing about this to my mate, but a few days later checked him out if he'd be comfortable me dating her and he said No. So she is off limits for now, but still a good flirt and a fun girl, good friend material and could help me with clothes and looks. She'd already suggested that night that I come into the shop some time, and this was the first chance I got. I went in with the express intention of inviting her out for my bday drinks that night, which I did, and she was delighted that i'd popped in to see her and invited her out.

I tried on a shirt, showed off my jewellery and boa. Caused a bit of a stir there, there was a HB7, changing room attendant, young one i was flirting with and she was very up for the flirt. Could only go so far as she wouldve thought I was a slag if i escalated with her while seemingly coming in to chase after the HB6! Lifes little complications, how funny

So fast forward to the evening and my best friend greg has arrived as he's staying up for the night (away from the wife and 2x kids).

I told him about the pickup study I'd been doing, after swearing him to secrecy. He was skeptical at first but then less so after I got him to help me roleplay Styles "2part kiss opener" which I was trying to learn so I had >1 routine. Keen to avoid mistakes of thurs night (see the other thread).

Seven of us met in a stylish tapas bar for a birthday meal. This was a big watershed for me, marking my return to the single social world. My LTR hated socialising here, result, I had zero social life for seven years. HOW DID I LET THIS HAPPEN = IDIOT . So really seeing the social game going on, how being the centre of attention at our table, leaning back, talking irreverant banter, kicking back and really having fun. I was getting strong IOIs from chicks at other tables. One wearing hotpants and suspenders cheered along with our table when i blew out the bday candle on my "cake". Only occured to me after that this one was on her feet 2 or 3 times making sorties away from the table. I shoulda framed that as an invite to follow, and approached her at the bar or outside the toilet. Next time baby, next time lol.

My sister texted to say she was not going to make it, and I was disappointed. but I looked around the table, ppl I've got much closer to in the last year, and a few complete new faces, and patted myself on the back for going out there and if my old friends and family cant be relied on, or don't want to play, well let them stew in their own and I'll just create a new circle. Its true what mystery says, we are creating a life here.

We had drinks in a busy pub across the road. Felt good to have the entourage of about 12-15 ppl in there. Though because they are diverse and many don't know each other, it was a bit awkward at times with ppl tending to stick to their own little groups. but then again a fragmented group gave me more opps to hop from one outpost to the other. My hairdresser arrived with a friend who'd flown in from London for the weekend. A HB7, she thought she was a supermodel and not willing to do any social work, be charming etc. I just left them to it, saw my mate greg struggling with her later too. The girl from the clothes shop turned up with her HB5 friend and she was good company.

My sensible (no sex, no alcohol) HB7.5 friend turned up with her gals (about 4 of them, 5s and 6s). While talking to them I got bored and just opened the 2set beside them. So much for NOT DOING ANY GAME ON MY BIRTHDAY. Cant even rember what I opened with (drink flowing at this stage) but i only know two so it had to be cat people or styles 2part kiss. Then I did the liar game HB8 was the target and I got her lie. She was astounded! Her pal the HB7 actually works as an investigator and didn't know how it worked fully I tried to number close there and then on the HB8 but she said "what? I'm not that easy!". Calibration out with the drinking for sure. Also not enuff escalation, too invested in the set, no false time contstraints etc. etc. But happy nonetheless as first outing for that material and good to know I can make it work.

Of course I got fantastic social proof from being a friend of 5x gals in the middle and wandering over. I took advantage of my 5x HB friend set to open a 2 or 3 set on the other side (getting hazy now remember this time being more cocky funny. Had to leave set as we were going clubbing, and I remember Greg shouting in my ear, come on we gotta go! but I had told him about false time constraints so he probably was winging me here lol and I didn't realise LOL

Over in the club remembered the lesson RedThirst had given me about making friends everywhere, and in the (long) toilet q got chatting to the fellow in front of me. We ended up shoulder to shoulder and when a door opened he insisted i go first LOL. Two weeks ago I woulda spent an unenjoyable 10mins waiting in a q in splendid isolation.

the place was packed and very easy to lose ppl, which i kept doing. I got rid of my coat to a pile of coats behind a snug and the feather boa made its appaerance. True to form, it was an instant hit, being grabbed at from left and right. It was on my shoulders 5mins when it was whipped off by somebody behind me. I knew it was prolly a girl who'd shown interest as i walked past, but when i finally got turned round (because of the crowd) she was away! couldnt see her anywhere and wasn't going to waste time, just put it down as lost.

I went to the smoking area as I could see some of the gang out there, but it was so packed I could't get into their set(s). I spoke to an accquaintance i just ran into and then i just sarged this HB6 out there smoking. 10mins later had a kclose. Very nice. But when I ran my hands down her waistline I was disappointed with what i felt so didn't follow up with a nclose or anything and just left her.

Back inside they were pouring shots into me. Cue crazed dancing, bro love for my man Gregory. Getting kino with mates ex off-limits HB6 (god is she tense, was she just pretending to flirt with me to make the mate jealous - hmm, no, her eyes and face showed she was having a good time, but her arms were so tense. Tried massage on back, she compliant but didn't make any diff. I genuinely wanted to get this girl relaxed, for no other reason than to get her relaxed. Had to give up lol.

My boa reappeared on the shoulders of a HB7, she said some girl outside had handed it to her (my boa thief). She didn't believe me that it was mine, and wouldn't hand it back. My fault for not making this a fun conversation. Missed opp. Ran into another accquaintance who was not out with us HB5, good place this, must go back. Pulled the boa off the HB7s shoulders. Not pleased with myself about this. An artist does not force things!!!!

by this stage, reunitied with boa, peacocked up, entourage all around me, big social proof, crazy drunken self expressed dancing with lots of hip, I was unquestionably the pimp in the room. chicks were coming in for a dance, bit of eye contact, then out again. I just let it go, push pull. The HB of the place, maybe 8.5 or 9 started grinding her ass in my crotch.

what did I do with all this?
nada LOL

excuse was: out with my pals for my bday, not going to leave them to go running after HBs. BUT I coulda nclosed ffs !!! or done SOMETHIN, lol

All the time I was painfully aware of AFCs stood round the edge of the floor, or shuffling back and fwd in the same spot. no social proof. nada. I've come some way bros!

The chick HB7 who had told me where the toilets were had long bare slightly tanned arms and she got my hand up and down them every time i went past. just kino, a wink and a smile. Why do i go mute in clubs lol

Anyway, the night ended, the entourage fragmented and I had to watch out for a friends friend who turned obnoxious once we hit the outside air. He was jealous of me i think, came with a bit of a rep as a ladies man, but no game, just natural instinct cocky funny. Hadn't worked for him 2night, seemed upset about something didn't even try i think, apart from shout abuse at some older HB4 i heard later. There but for the grace of god go I LOL. On the way home I stepped beyond where i'd normally go and tried to out-alpha him, but there was a lorra alpha in this dude. Have to admit he was funny and we sorta liked each other too haha. Lost him anyhow (but also my nice guy pals unfortunately) in the taxi melee. Went home drank tonnes of gin, smoked reef with greg, played 80s music for hours. Great bday!

The problem with Saturday is that I allowed my chatty talkative state to dissipate by the time we got to the end of the club. It was there for sure at the meal. In the pub it had gone again a bit, due to alcohol consumption, and an anxiety that ppl would turn up, would have a good time etc.

Also that Aussie girl who turned up with my hairdresser in the pub, I shuda just disqualified her right from the off so she couldn't blow me out (and me not even hitting on her, just being friendly). That took my state down. More so than going into a set and getting blown out, you are sorta ready for that LOL. You don't expect it from a friend of a friend. Bit of a player that one methinks.

In the club some of the lads just kept feeding shots into me, so it was harder to control my alcohol consumption than I would if it wasn't my bday. But its not going to be my bday everynight, so that won't be a problem. Then again, I won't have a big entourage out every night, that was a massive social advantage that I should have capitalized more on, by pulling some of those hot birds in the club.

The boa theft thing made me angry. Again, had I less alcohol consumed I coulda reframed this more playfully. Given that it turned up again inside the club, its easier to attribute playful motives to the boa thief. When I saw the boa again, on HB7 shoulder, I coulda reframed the sitch, as "theres my boa back, hooray, and whoever is wearing it is my plaything too". At the end of the day the aim was to get the boa onto a HB for isolation/locking in. Now, there was the end result in front of me, only I got all upset and couldn't see this cos I didn't put it there LOL.

I ended up the night in a familiar role: that of "mute dancer". Busting great moves and getting IOIs but unable to escalate through being unable to put any chat together. Familiar AFC place to be for me LOL.

Also Saturday I had no wings who had any game. A wing woulda helped sort me out big time.

Lesson: The value of a wing!