It started on the dancefloor… that’s where the trouble always started….
My Game appears to have jumped between the dancefloor, the street and bars a fair few times during the last 6-9 months. One thing I have realised is that it’s good to be versatile. Even if you don’t like street game, getting good at it will improve your dancefloor game. Exposure to opening sets in bars will improve your street game as you expose yourself to your fears and internalise the behaviours that lead to high levels of attraction.
The last month or so has been spent doing mainly street game and developing a style similar to Mystery Method (opening sets) in bars. I have not spent much time in the club (it’s noisy, difficult to talk and run routines). After a while however it went a bit flat. Sure, I was approaching, opening and closing… but I was not enjoying it. I’m naturally mischievous and I missed the dancefloor. I’ve been listening to The Blueprint and have had a number of realisations. A relevant one here was the importance of having fun. So I’m getting back into the club again….
Friday night was the first in a while. I had had a long week at work, was nackered and not really in the mood for partying… all the more reason to go out! I get to the venue with Hugo Drax and it’s not yet busy. We’re by the side of the dancefloor, I’m dancing when a decent track comes on and Mr Drax is scoping the place for sets. I speak to a few people, male and female, about various things, nothing too intense. I don’t have a great deal of social momentum, could have done with opening a few warm up sets in nearby bars before coming here… but tonight I’m being lazy.
The venue starts to fill up, with it the dancefloor and the energy level of the whole place starts to increase. The DJ starts playing some really great tracks. Drax and I wade into the centre of the dancefloor and start dancing as some space opens up in the middle of the floor. I dance a bit crazy (mix Neyo/Justin Timberlake with some Prodigy addicted raver who looks like he doesn’t give a sh** and you’re almost there).
** I did a report in December about the importance of social proof in club game (see Dancefloor – This is how we do!
dancefloor-this-is-how-we-do-vt59052.html?highlight= )
You need to be the party, the centre of the excitement, the person having the most fun. When you’re doing this people will get drawn into the warm end of the pool” (Tyler Durden – The Blueprint)**
Two girls come into the middle close to where we are and are followed by a bunch of their friends. They’re dancing close to us and I have my back to them, they keep bumping into me, lol. I turn around a bit and give the blonde one a playful brush on the shoulder (the “get the dirt off your shoulder” gesture – I do this playfully to girls in the club to test the water). When she looks at me I brush the dirt off my shoulder towards her. She laughs.
** My dancing seems to attract girls. For a long time I would get opened on the dancefloor but not know what to do. The key is to make them qualify, jump through hoops (don’t just jump on them cos they’re hot), lead them. Teasing/winding them up is also great (see bit on dancefloor in Turned her from bratty to begging me to fu** her
turned-her-from-bratty-to-begging-me-to ... highlight= ) This is really congruent for me and generates a lot of attraction. They really work hard to win you over.**
I go back to dancing a bit but these females are getting closer. Now a line of them are standing opposite me and Mr Drax. I look at the blonde one (she is a 10, beautiful face, curves all over the place, long blonde hair – super model beautiful), and say “yeah, not bad… you get about 6 out of 10” (for her dancing). We start to dance close to each other. I grab her hips and spin her around until she gets dizzy. She asks me if I can teach her to dance. I tell her it depends on whether she’s a quick learner. I tell her “you’re pretty sweet. It’s too bad I’m gay” and her face just drops, she looks really disappointed, lol. We continue to dance. I push her into another group of girls and laugh.
The way I’m dancing with her is important too. Girls always want me to dance, cos they like it, but I’m not there to perform for them. So I’m leaning back, watching her dance. Leaning back against something is good. It’s like you’re screening them. They are dancing FOR YOU, trying to win you over not the other way round. I’m looking at her, looking her in the eye, holding it… letting the tension build… staying with it… I’m also not focusing too much on her. We’re talking and Mr Drax comes back. I stop talking to her to talk to him (this communicates that she does not have higher value to me than my friend. If she wants my attention she needs to work a bit and I’m not going to drop everything just cos she is super hot – this push/pull is a fine balance though and you can alienate them if you push too hard). I’m also intermittently talking to some nearby dude who is observing the whole thing.
She continues to dance for me. I escalate gradually. Taking her hand, pulling her in, touching her face, touching her hair (I lift it up and tell her it looks better like that. I ask her if she has a hair band – she didn’t but if she did I would have told her to put her hair up). I pull her in and her bag is in between us by her waist, I tell her to move it. I make her turn around for me. I take her hand and lead her to different places. I ask if she smokes. She does. I tell her off (“smoking is bad for you, your Mamma wouldn’t want you to smoke so you shouldn’t do it”), lol. At various points she is tentative or does not comply. I push her away, physically. I also lean back and look the other way for a while. She asks me later why I keep looking at other stuff, lol. After doing this I give her the test again and she complies. She is super hot. I want to kiss her. But she is not ready. At no point do I chase this (I’ve really gotten better at controlling myself in these situations and waiting for the right time to move, not rushing). I pull her hair, kiss her neck. I kiss her face, her cheeks. She is ready to be kissed on the lips but I make her wait for it. When we do she really goes for it. All through this I am pulling away after a period, leaving her wanting more, before she gets too hot and pulls away.
Her main friend is away getting macked on by some other dude. At a few points the two groups meet and I give the guy the look to say “good work dude” (he’s effectively winging me, lol). Things are getting really hot as we continue to escalate. I break it up, go to kiss her, than pull away when she leans in, lol, this is all great fun
. I number close (before I forget) than go back to it. We sit down, we talk. I ask her if she takes drugs, She says no. I ask if she can cook. She says she can. When I ask her what she says she can cook whatever I like to eat. At no point am I needing the interaction. I take her hand and lead her around the place. I am not worried that she won’t follow. I am going over here and she can come if she wants to. Either way I am going. I don’t hold her hand too tight, she grabs mine tighter. At one point I sit on a sofa, she is standing away from me and I tell her to come to me. She refuses. I display disinterest. Tell her again. She refuses. I display disinterest. We do this for a while. I display disinterest for longer, tell her to come, she does, I give her a hug (this is a sh** test, if you go to her you lose!).
Later on in the night we are hugging on the sofa and I’m stroking her hair (rapport). The lights come on, I tell her it’s time to go. I take her to where her friend is. The guy she is with gives me high five. I kiss her, hold her, kiss her again and tell her I’ll see her round.
I have spent the last six weeks doing stuff that scares me. Doing the approaches I am not comfortable doing in the street and in bars. Confronting the fears that remain. I can feel that I have changed during this period. My reality is changing. The amazing is becoming the norm. When I came across this in The Blueprint it blew my mind. Now I can see it unfolding in front of me. On the way home I reflected on my night. I had done everything instinctively. I had not retreated into my head. This behaviour is a result of the “training” I have done recently. I amused myself the whole evening. I teased the super hot girl with the attitude that I may never see here again after tonight, so I should amuse myself while she is in front of me. From her point of view this was counterintuitive and it made her more attracted to me. We’ve been texting for the last few days. Let’s see how I can amuse myself
CHAT