First Field Report

Ok I was in a bar with my wing and he pointed to a 2 set and told me to approach them. This was my first real set so I was a little nervous. So I walked up to them both and said:

Me: hey, can I get your opinion on something? I’ve just bought this jacket today and need a females opinion on it, I’m still undecided if it’s any good.

Target: yeah I think it really nice, what do think obstacle? That ok isn’t it?

Obstacle: it’s shit

Me: (a little taken back by this) yeah? Whys it shit?

Obstacle: it’s just shit, look at it.

Me: ok well like I said I just needed a female’s opinion because I bought it today and haven’t seen any of my female friends yet. I’m just here with my mate over there (looked in a vague direction). Great guy by the way. He did a citizen’s arrest the other day. There aren’t many people you know who would do that is there.

Target: we can’t hear what you’re saying. (We were stood under a speaker I’d just noticed)

Me: it’s that speaker isn’t it? What a pain.

Target: (grabs another girl from another set and says) what do you think to this jacket?

Other girl: yeah it’s alright.

Obstacle: its shit. Look at it. Take it back.

Me: ok, why’s it shit?

Obstacle: how old are you?

Me: I’m 23

Other girl: (probably saw I was not only crashing and burning, but the whole town had gone up in flames, killing everyone that lived there. So she said to me) are you alright?

Me: yeah I’m fine

Obstacle: look I’m an old woman with a bad temper and I’m not interested in you so why don’t you go away? (Mean girl about 25 years old)

Me: Ha! I think you’re flattering yourself just a little bit.

Target and other girl: OOOWW! You need to leave now.

Me: yeah I think so too. Thanks for your opinions.

I’ve seen that I jumped through her hoop when she asked my age and instead of disarming her I just blew her out. Any feedback from this would be great. This was my first approach ever and looking back on it I can see several things that went wrong.

Wolfie 87 wrote: Other girl: (probably saw I was not only crashing and burning, but the whole town had gone up in flames, killing everyone that lived there. So she said to me) are you alright

hahahaha. I'm sitting behind my computer laughing about this line for about 2 minutes now haha!

Anyway. Good analisys. Just relax. You did goot actually, your opener transgressed into a conversation and as a newby you are target practice to a cockblocker. Don't let that get to you, it happened to all of us.

Besides, your target really grabbed a girl from another set, thats good man! And that girl was asking if you were allright, they could probably smell your nervousness, don't worry, you'll learn how to conceal that with practice, I think you showed some serious balls here!

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I could not tread these perilous paths in safety, if I did not keep a saving sense of humor. -Admiral Horatio Nelson

Well done for posting. Next time, neg the obstacle, give her something to think about before she can slate you!

yeah, NEG the obstacle.

something like "is she always like this? how do you guys roll with her?"

Congratulations on approaching and not just letting another opportunity pass you by bro. That girl just wanted to be a bitch to be a bitch. Don't let it get to you!

I think more advice would just confuse you. The best thing I can say is keep doing approaches, keep posting field reports and keep studying.

It's a good thing there's a community out here to support this stuff because it's experiences like these that would really turn guys off to this entire thing.

cheers man, and keep it up

Damn dude, that was an awesome first set.

My first sets went far worse!

Good FR and keep posting

Scamps

It sounds like you tried to plow through, even in the face of harsh resistance, which is actually quite an admirable trait. With a similarly strong inner game, further in-field experience and better game, I can see you getting some much better results sooner than you expected. Even if you're nervous, you gotta go in... after a while certain situations don't bother you as much. I think about my sarging recently and how much better I feel compared to when I started learning PUA and going out to meeting people (pretty big difference - even though I still have a long way to go).

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Flowmentum Dating | FB

Bitchy girls like that actually can be more fun if you deal with them the right way. You can neg them, but sometimes it gets a little hostile. If you smile at her and shrug her off, calling her feisty and maybe being a little sarcastic in a playful way... you'll disarm her and her friends or friend will probably think you're funny.

I don't have all that much experience with girls like that, because the women I approach tend to not be so bitter. Out of the few occasions I have experienced this, the most noticeable was a 6-set with a girl I thought of as an "alpha".

They were about 2-3 years older than me, all dressed for the clubs and very loud. I approached them on the street with a friend of mine, and the alpha girl was loud, aggressive and tried to knock us out in a way that would get a laugh from her friends. When she did this, we just pointed out her sarcasm and she shut up quickly. Her friends all wanted to chat, and while we were conversing she listened far more intently than everyone else.

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-Fortune favors the bold-

Dude first of all very well done on approaching.. your target seemed to be cool and you seemed to build a bit of a convo with them. I liked your opener actually its quite generic however can cause a bit of a debate.

The other girl to be honest (or old lady :/ ha!) was a bit of a moody cow and if im honest shes probably the kind of girl I personally would want to stay away from. She probably has some issues of her own. You should have negged her or come back with something witty (I'm so bad at being witty myself!)

Or it could just be these moody brummie girls ey Growing up with them I feel the pain ha!

Keep up the approaching!

Cheers guys, this is some pretty good advice you’re giving. Cheers for the pep talks too, thats pretty much the response I was hoping for.

Buccaneer, I’m glad my post made you laugh. Yours definitely helpped me put the situation into a more enjoyable experience and a better perspective. Like one of those times when you balls something up so bad that when you look back at it later, you have to laugh about it.

Chelios/Earthquake, yeah you guys are definitely right about the NEG. I’m pretty bad at thinking on the spot though, but I suppose I’ll learn how to respond to situations as they happen.

Extricate, your right about the community. This forum alone helps boost my confidence.

Dr. Beat, your right about the smiling. I don’t think I smiled at the obstacle once on her last comment, which most definitely made me come over as more hostile than intended... big lesson learnt.

ReversalUK, this is the first rude person I’ve met in Birmingham (off the road anyway) but yeah she seemed quite drunk as well. Actually that was another reason why I left and didn’t try to redeem myself. She seemed to be getting mad at me and I didn’t fancy wearing that green liquid that she called a drink... I like my new coat

Anyway cheers guys. All your posts have been helpful and supportive. Much appreciated.