SLAPPING THE BASS MON'

YOU'RE ONE OF THE BEST MAN!

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The LB crew has been planning this trip for awhile due to V4NQUISHE’s burfday and this weekend would not be a disappointment. With xaifer number closing a gay guy, BBad almost luring a strpper back to the hotel, Drewskie almost getting married, Swagger with his crazy antics, and myself almost laying an Oklahoma breezy. It proved to be an epic weekend with explosive proportions…

Friday rolls around and I’m stuck at work. It’s almost 11:00am and have to be at xaifer’s pad before 12 & I still haven’t packed, fucken great! Luckily, my co-worker came in a few minutes late (I know right!) and take off as soon as he gets there. I get to my pad and start packing and am already feeling in state because of all the fucking shit that’s gonna happen. I get to xaif’s and am immediately greeted by my boy Swagger. Dude’s been sipping on the sisyrup already. AWESOME! Drewskie’s already there and so is CCLB team lead BBad (nice plug huh)

As soon as I get there we’re off onto the road. The trip to Vegas didn’t take as long as I expected and got there around 5:00pm. Perfect!

Drewskie’s homeboy got us a free suite at the Rio & looked much better than expected. Two beds, sofa bed, bathroom was roomy, and a beautiful view of Vegas. We get ourselves situated and get ready for the nights event. Tonight’s club of choice was Club XS at the Encore. This club is one of the most exotic, vibrant, & energetic clubs I’ve ever been too.

The women here are fucking gorgeous and the venue is fucking huge with an extravagant pool overlooking the entire patio. We start getting ready ‘round 8:00 to beat the line and get in with no problem. Around 10:30, we get inside and my eyesight immediately gets attacked by the plethora of beautiful breezies walking around almost naked. It was a Casanova goldmine! I hit the bar to get myself and make friends with Vanessa the bartender.

I’ve learned that meeting the bartenders and bouncers early on can definitely help you throughout the night, as was the case with Vanessa. I get my drink and immediately get to work. I start opening couples, dudes, fatties, UG’s, and anyone to gain momentum. By the time I opened a hottie, I was in my usual fun mood. I walk around the patio with an oasis of beautiful women and open a 3 set of Canadians.

Me: Hey ladies! What’s up! Is this where all the good looking people get approached…

This opener has become pretty much my standard. I try to get laughter off the approach so I can immediately anchor a positive feeling onto me. This does two things. It’s a pattern interrupt and a state booster for the set.

Set bust out laughing….

HBCalgary: Hahaha.. that’s funny! What’s your name!

Me: OMG woman! We just met and already you’re trying to get into my pants..Jeezus…you woman don’t quit huh, It’s okay, you can take advantage of me..

HBCalgary: Hahahaha….OMG you’re so hilarious (KINO) what brings you to Vegas

Input drewskie’s bachelor celebration…HAHAHAHA….

Me: One of my boy’s is getting married next weekend so it’s kind of like “The Hangover,” only we haven’t seen Mike Tyson or a crazy asian though..

HBCalgary: Well, your friend is kinda cute (She did say that Drewskie, forgot to tell you hahaha) That’s too bad because my sister’s the only single one out of all of us..

Enter HBTigBits;

At this point Xaifer & drewskie were entertaining the other 2 girls while Tigbits entered. I immediately mini isolated her by switching my buddy opposite of the set. She was Hispanic so we immediately had something in common. I teased her about her nationality and actually found out she’s from the same country as me..

HBTigBits: So, where you from

Me: I don’t bang or anything but I’m from Nicaragua…Beautiful country, you’d totally love it..

HBTigBits: OMG! Are you serious! I’m from Nicaragua myself, I don’t believe you

She was shit testing me because I was a bit too high energy for her and was cracking too many jokes. I learned that being funny is my default because it’s basically a natural ability to me. Sort of how naturals never listen to others advice because their shit always works. Her shit testing me was actually favoring me because I felt that she was genuinely interested which was ramping up the attraction.

Me: I’m serious, (at this point I whipped out my phone to the flag of Nicaragua)

As soon as I opened up my phone and saw the flag, she got excited (very rare you meet Nicaraguan peeps) and gave me a huge hug. At this point, interest was pretty high so I number close her and ask her where she lives. “I live in Lynwood,” she says. Smiling, I looked in her eyes and laughed. “What!” she said with the most beautiful smile. “I live in Downey,” I said coyly. “*Gasp* OMG you better call me,” she said as she was being dragged away by her cockblocking as friends…

The crew was pretty much separated for half the night. I’ve learned I perform a bit better by myself although I’m still getting used to it. As I’m walking back inside I spot my boy Starks (Starkilla), V4NQUISH, Kmakazinrd, & STUNNASHADES. Starks is fucking amp’d the fuck up and immediately starts going balls out on a set. I leave only to find BBad and Xaifer on the dance floor with 2 cute breezies.

Outside the patio I spot a lone wolf by the pool. I walk straight up to her and ask her if everythings alright. She looked lost. She got lost from the pack and was pretty much waiting around for her friends to find her, who were probably already getting dicked. I must dick this girl too! We talk and banter for a bit and find out she’s from Chicago. She’s wearing a tight white and black dressing that evenly brings out her vuluptious booty.

Breezy was cute and latina! MMMM my favorite! As we’re talking, I turned my face directly towards instead of having her talk to my ear. I can feel the tension building as soon as I did this. After a couple more random threads, I caught my lips getting closer and closer to hers. Fuck it…I went in for the kiss and almost landed in the fucken pool. Bitch got wild. It was a hot ass kiss. We made out a few more times through out the night but didn’t actually take it anywhere. Fuck it!

As the club is dying down, I find out that everyone fucking left. THANKS FOR THE NOTICE FUCKERS! I walk around trying to spot someone and run into Shishou. Dude is mad cool cat. Welcome to the crew playa. After, I spot Swagger already isolated with some asian broad making out. Jeez….Xaifer hits me up letting me know that he’s leaving. Fuck it…I tell him to wait for me and get Swagger. BBad and Drewskie decided to hit up another casino while Xaifer, Swagger, myself decided to head back to the room. It was 4:00am for Christ sakes. We get into our casino and decide I’m gonna get something to grub on. Big dudes gotta eat ya know!

Xaifer and Swagger headed to the room while I stayed downstairs. I get my food and head to the elevator. On the second stop, a cute chick gets in it’s only me in the elevator. IT’S ON! We talked for a couple minutes and ramped up sexual attraction (Hey, it was a long ass elevator ride, we were both on the 12th floor) I invited her to my room for some “R&R” you feel me. She was a cutie from Oklahoma celebrating her sister’s marriage. I get to my room and turn back only to see her right behind me. Before we get into the room, I go in for a makeout and get denied. Instead, she starts grabbing and slapping my sexy ass .. Whatever…

Swagger opens the door and looks quite stunned at the fact that I’m walking in with a chick. Xaif immediately gets up and throws up a nice colgate smile. HAHAHA….At this point, I was fucking tired and quite frankly, had to take a huge ass dump…Hahaha…I stood quiet for most of the time she was in there because I really had to go…Fucking embarrassing…Maybe it was a mixture of sexual anxiety and bubbleguts that fucked me up. Regardless, chick was DTF and I fucked up. Feel free to flame me. After, I fell asleep laughing at the epic fail I caused for myself. FUCK!

“Rise and shine you fuckers!” shouts Xaifer as he loudly scrambles out of bed. It’s 9:00am and Xaifer and I are the only dudes awake. We decide to get some breakfast at one of the buffets. Catching up with my boy Xaifer was actually dope. We talked about errrthing. Life, family, pussy, etc. etc. Good talk…

After we ate, we head back to the room only to find out that BBad apparently tried to lure a stripper thinking she was just another random breezy. Fucking hilarious. The day pretty much flew as we walked around Caesars Palace daygaming random chicks. I was fucking exhausted. We head back to the hotel around 8:00pm and start getting ready for the night.

The club of choice for the night was Tao at the Venetian. Tao is possibly THE best club in Vegas. It’s fucking exotic, sexy, and highend. My favorite club by far. We get into a taxi making our way over but not before Swagger number closes an HB that later texted him for “Coffee” around 4am. Tao is one of the most difficult clubs to get into. BBad and
I separate and try to get in only to be kicked out because they weren’t “accepting general admission” anymore.

You basically need hot chicks to get in. BBad & Swagger start discussing alternatives ignoring the fact that I’ve been to this club numerous times and pretty much know the routine. Xaifer and I walk away from the pack and spot a 4 set of asian hotties. They agree to be our “girlfriends” for the night so we can get in and worked out perfectly. Shortly after, BBad and Swagger made themselves in.

Survival of the fittest FUCKERS!

We get in the club and Xaifer out of nowhere starts fucking bursting with energy. Dude had to be on something. His energy was off the charts and pretty much propelled the group to match his high *oops, I mean energy*

BBad gets lost in the mix and hits me up. We meet by the bathroom and immediately make our way up to Tao beach. As we walk upstairs, I mentally decided to at least make out with the hottest chick at the club. We get upstairs, walk through the crowd looking for the other dudes and spot Xaifer and Swagger already making out with their sets. WHAT THE FUCK! LOL..BBad and I laugh it off as If to say, “We better do something about that.”

I decide to split from the pack for a bit and spot a bachelorette party going on on the outskirts of the club. I opened the bachelorette congratulating her. She pops up a list of shit she has to do before she gets married. One of em’ was to have a guy lick her neck. I had to help her ! The next thing on the list was to get a dudes underwear..
So being the good guy that I am, I immediately open a dude walking with his girl asking him to help out the poor old bachelorette.

Dude agrees and proceeds to take off his fucking draws! Hahahah! His chick was fucking hot too! Turned out they were from London! Xaifer joins the group and immediately the girls start jumping on his cock. Dudes a good looking flip ya feel me. He busts out a mission for her and we make our way as Britdude comes back with his underwear in hand. LOL…

Xaif and I separated from the group for a bit and went balls out opening sets. We DHV’ed each other like no tomorrow. As we’re walking through the crowd, I felt a tap on the shoulder. I turn around only to spot Britdude at a table with 3 fucking gorgeous London females. He greets me high energy almost as if I was a celebrity and introduces me to the rest of his group. Jade, Feebe, Kate, Dory, Cris. I immediately set eyes on Jade, she was fucking gorgeous. I spoke to her for a bit and when I found out she had a brit accent, I wanted to fuck her RAW! Fucking sexy!

We make the table homebase and start walking around some more opening sets and what not. We get into the dancefloor and start a mini Circle of Awesomeness. We bump into a group of older blonde cute chicks and let them know that Drewskie’s getting married. One of the chicks grabs drewskie and starts dancing. Chick definitely was into drew. Don’t believe me? Ask him what she told him. It involves the words “Free” and “Pass” hahahahha…

After a couple more rounds around the club, we hit up britdude’s table and start shooting the shit. Britdude takes his chick out to the dancefloor and I sit next to Jade. Swagger follows and sits next to Dory only to make out with her shortly after. Jade and I start talking and I couldn’t help but tell her that her accent was really fucking turning me on. She blushed as if she never heard that before.

I did my French goodbye routine and kissed her softly on her lips only to be attacked by her tongue. Xaifer managed to get a pic before the make out. We took over their table and were accepted with open arms. The whole club seen this. I had 3 beautiful girls around me while everyother AFC dude wishing he could be me…

The club was dying down after awhile and Xaifer and I headed back to the hotel only after dude closed one of the hottest chicks I’ve ever seen in my life. Show em’ the pic fucking Xaif!

Xaif and I get some grub and proceed to head back to the room discussing the antics of the night over Mickie D’s. I laid on the bed thinking to myself why I can’t be this way all the time. It’s not where you are, it’s who you are….

Forgot to mention...Xaifer number closed a gay dude from Canada...HAHAHAHA

Peace.
LBCrew
Pussies don’t get Pussy

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JoRocK
CasanovaCrew