Well, I've been flirting with a girl over the Internet. Not to go too much into details, in short: There has been an exchange of messages, something like 8 or 10 (it lasted about a week). Most of them were spicy, I wanted to build proper frame from the very beginning (I put emphasis on not strictly but still sexual themes – building attraction first). Then, I proposed a meeting . She agreed. We met each other in the centre of a city. She spotted me and approached.I told her I know an excellent bar (it's really very cosy but not romantic too) and that she comes with me.

Well, we sit in a restaurant. We talked to each other for about an hour. I could say the conversation was funny for her, as she smiled or laughed every three minutes of what I have said. Generally, she was a kind of witch and negging her behaviour worked very good on her.

I could spot, she sent me an IOI (I took her hand, she returned my touch) In one moment she put her hand on my thigh. Then I realized, she has sent me earlier possibly lots of IOIs, but I couldn't read her body language and missed it. Anyway, I knew it's time for more kino.

So I thought, it was the best time to kiss' er. But I just couldn't simply kiss her, I don't know why excuses happened. (what if she rejects me, maybe later, maybe she isn't ready...) Instead of just grabbing her neck and give a kiss, I started a stupid chat about the meaning of the kisses in life of women (man, as I write this post I can't believe myself I did it for real). She listened and was looking into my eyes, so I finally understand she actually waits for a kiss. I shut up this fruitless talk and kiss her. She reacted positively. After a kiss, she said:

”It was funny to observe you wondering how to do it” but without irony. Man, I felt like a complete asshole and actually I was the one. Anyway, the rest of the evening was very funny, we both left the bar a bit drunk, give a hug to each other, one more kiss, waited for her buss and she departed. She sent mi a text message next day she had very good time.

But I'm still wondering, how many I have lost in her eyes but waiting for that kiss and how will it influence other future relation. Beyond consciousness, she registered this behaviour as demonstrating lower value, showing I'm not so self-confident as she thought earlier. Maybe it cost me even getting laid that evening?[/b]

I believe that waiting too long for the kiss might have been a DLV to her eyes, since she might be used to guys being a bit faster, or at least have more desicion about kissing her.

She even made a remark on that one:

”It was funny to observe you wondering how to do it”

Its kinda like if she had been thinking of other guys shes dated who were a lot faster on kissing her. And there she is, waiting for you to take action, but you didnt make her crave for it, just made her wait.

YOu might have lookd anxious, or nervous, and you know, when it comes down to detect nervousnes or anxiety, women can feel it, smell it and almost touch it.

So lets say, yes, you displayed anxiety wich in many ways is a DLV for itself. But the good thing is that you went for te Kiss. Now id say to think for yourself..

Did I felt uncomfortable right after the kiss?
Did she looked uncomfortable?
Was there an awkward silence?...

I hope the answer to those is NO. Either way, you made her loose some of the attraction that you had built. but, again, you went for the kiss, so thats proof that you have guts and you are willing to make a move and have a good time.

So, in my opinion, and similar personal experiences. You might have DLVd, and lost some attraction, but you showed guts and willingness to move forward, so id say that shes definetely gonna give you a second chance next time shes in town.

oh, another thing. about the DLV... even though it took you long to make the Kiss move, if it was a GOOD kiss, and i mean reALLY GOOOOOOD kiss and she enjoyed.... Have it for sure that she will want more.

WHY? because women see kissing as something a bit more sensual/erotic and/or emotional than men do. Some women might even be aroused better only by kissing, than other kinds of stimulations.

IF it took you long, but you made it a SEXY KISS, then youre up for more
If the kiss wasnt good at all, you can say good bye.

Be confident, you know you are. Just dont hessitate too much when K clossing or escalating KINO, as mystery said, DONT MAKE EXCUSES; DONT BE A WUSS. GO RAISE KINO and CLOSE !!

ok this is my take on your issue !!

good luck !!

_________________
".. I will learn all that I've forgotten, I will succeed where I'd previously failed, and even if I don't I wont stop, cuz this is not just about girls, this is about Life "

Thanks for profound analysis, Bass

I think she liked the kiss, I just got a message from her – she wants to hang out with me on Monday.

But yes, it's definitely better to escalate kino too early than too late. The worst thing in escalating too early is that you'll be considered rude, what is actually an advantage in the eyes of a woman;) and surely she will forgive rude behaviour than being AFC (honestly said, I behaved like AFC).

A few years ago (I haven't heard about PUA, NLP till that time), I met my female friend from secondary school. She just got married. We recalled old times, drank a lot of alcohol, so when we were leaving, she has to help me with dressing my jacket, because I wanted to put it on opposite site It was late, and I said to her: You know, we were going to the same class for four years and I have never kissed you. She replied: It's too late now, I'm married, I always liked you but you haven't noticed it. Now I have a husband... Then I stopped her talk by saying: I don't fucking care, grabbed her neck and kiss. It was a deep kiss and she didn't resist to it. It lasted for 5 minutes although there was cold outside.

In that situation, I know she isn't for me so I didn't care about her opinion and about „what she will think about me”. It's crucial to have this kind of approach to every woman. Not to think too much.

Yeah. Im glad she liked the kiss, and now Youre off to a second date with her !!...

But this time, what are you going to do?.. Thats right, youre going to be more direct in your aproach. why? Because shes already given you enough IOIs; agreeing a second date with you is pretty mucho enough of an IOI. But only because she knows that even though it took you long to make the Kiss move, you are gonna come off a bit more strong now that you know shes also into you.

Its like the MPUA Cajun said once. Why wasting time on indirect openers or playing it "cool".. when shes already shown every sign that shes actually interested in you..

So go strong, confident, and dont be afraid to make your move. Its actually more interesting to a girl spendind 15 minutes on a date with you trying to kiss her and F her. than having to spend 3 hours on a date talking about the "meaning of kisses on a womans life" when all she wants is to get down and dirty..


On a personal note, i believe that...
For most of us guys, we sometimes get stranded around the A3 and C2 phases of the game, you know A2 the girls already giving you IOIs, and instead of taking advantage of those to play push pull and make her invest more into the moment, or the relationship (going from a3 to c1), we kinda feel afraid of making a move, thus by the time we get to the A3 phase, a man making a woman invest more into him it becomes difficult for us to go beyond that phase.

Think for a moment that she already gave you the IOIs (A2) and it takes too long for you to pick up on those, and instead of going for the kiss and have her investing into you, (A3) you deliberately change the topic to something boring or at least something unexpected and unattractive.

So by the time you try to go A3 and beyond, shes not certain that you will be much of an interesting sex parthner and she might even feel un attracteed, thus the efforts you made to go from A1 to A3 are now being destroyed because shes not feeling much comfortable around a guy who hesitates too much. and why would she wanna invest into a guy thats too afraid of making a move??.

So Yes, you have A1, you opened, then you had her giving you IOIs by creating attraction, thats A2, next time she gave you the "i want to be kissed" look and you rewarded her with more IOI from your part, acknowledgeing that you want to kiss her too, and eventually you did, so you went from A3 now, to C1, building rapport.

You made some small talk, fluff talk in fact, and then had some rapport with her, made a small conection (C2) and eventually you kissed her.

Now thats where you are, C2, the connection phase, where its important to balance between keeping her invested into the growing relationship, and not scaring her away by being too forceful.

so thats my opinion, take it from here, go playful, more direct and she´ll just want to spend more time with you.

Good luck !!

_________________
".. I will learn all that I've forgotten, I will succeed where I'd previously failed, and even if I don't I wont stop, cuz this is not just about girls, this is about Life "