| Sat/07/03 Field Report
Overview
My winman met me outside rooftop gardens with two girls who seemed to be all dolled up. One had a very marilyn monroe style look and they seemed to be middle-upper class from their behaviour and talking which was a little off putting since i'm used to more down to earth people. My wing left me with them but I didn't even attempt to talk to them as I wasn't really comfortable around them or feel that wed have anything in common (limiting belief...). The girls left shortly after he returned because monroes ex boyfriend was there. I was quite relieved as my wing was putting way too much investment into blondy and pressure on me to occupy the friend.
I feel fine but I'm told I look grumpy, twice... (Probably from being annoyed at my wing). I look in the mirror and I still appear normal; I guess people are letting me know where my vibe is at. My wing is now upset about the girls leaving and his further reflection into the matter is steadily stifling me. We dance ALOT, I mean I LOVE to dance but I know when I've done too much and I won't take action. At this rate, this will be one of those nights. I hardly approach though I do see some iois. Roof gardens seems like a place that good dancing is actually appreciated, probably because it's not as dark, you have space to dance and most of all the male crowd seems to be rich stiffs.
Thing about dancing is I don't care how good you are so long as you own it and love it. If you're up in your head when dancing then that's a sure fire way to shove me DEEP into my head. And this was exactly what was happening now. My thoughts start revolving around them:
"I'm dancing amazingly,loving it, meanwhile my wing is value scanning and stood like a statue, this must look like such a mismatch"
"I'm a better dancer and I know that's all my wing is thinking right now...."
I'd rather dance alone and/or move through the crowd like water than bogie with someone who's 99% in the moment. These days i'm being more selective with what girls I dance intimately with; if she can't dance on her own then there's no way in hell she will be a good dance partner. Span a cute girl and her movement was so stiff the only word that springs to mind to describe it is crane.. No thanks :/
A girl kinda opens me on the dancefloor, we exchange moves and I perfect my silly dance. Its always fun to have a few unique silly moves. She is a good dancer and is fun but any attempts to communicate or get close to dance man to woman fall flat. My wing does make a good suggestion to go out with girls who can dance.
I lose my wing and open a girl. Her friend is talking to a random dude but I think my off energy scares them off. I chat with the dude; he's drunk but quite funny. We open together with a series of comments, his favourite being "He's black, hes got a big dick". I ask him where he's from and dub him the prince of Persia.
The prince proceeds to get us blown out over and over but its funny as fuck so I stick with it. The last one is particularly bad as he calls a girl flat chested. I'm convicted through sheer numbers, attractiveness and belligerence this guy must get laid at least on occasion. He seems like a classic example of a " fake alpha" (models by mark Manson). One thing's for certain, he's polarising. He leaves me with them and shits awkward now, not so much that they mind me but that "your friend's a dick". Guilt by association.
I bounce at the first oppertunity and head for the outside tent. I open a girl and notice Todd over her shoulder. Looks like Todds boot camp is in the same club as me for a second night in a row. I find a wing I knew and it reminded me of the advice he gave to me the night before to "slow down". Recently I'd hook sets but then get blown out by friends or they'dnrun off even though its going well.
The feedback I've been receiving lately has been to " slow down" and "calm down, pressure off". I'm really good at dance floor game and physicality but my verbals are weak. So I tend to escalate in a way that I'd be quite intimate within 5 mins but the friends would disapprove big time. The effect slowing down has had on my game seems consistent with what i've been reading about demographics in the book models.
We start talking to some women and it seemed a bit rocky at first as my attempts to slow down felt a bit forced. After a few sets we started talking to a two set from France. The girl I was speaking to could hardly speak English and her cousin was very much the mother hen type. I spoke very simply and slowly, took my time and tried to have a very basic conversation. I held back my physicality big time sprinkling it in here and there within a few minutes and she went from looking, to staring at my lips, awesome. I didn't actually do for the make out as my wing was only occupying the cousin and I could tell that it would just get me blown out. In hindsight I should have moved behind mother hen and made out/number closed.
We walk outside and my wing is reluctant to talk to two seated ladies because he feels awkward, as if walking up the stairs just to chat to them is showing too much interest or something. I push him to do it because its the set he doesn't want to do. That means its the best set to do in the whole club, I didn't let him get out of it either. It goes over very well and they invite us to sit with them. She basically holds the conversation off the open. She asks what I do and I tell her I'm unemployed.
Its incredible how if you're comfortable with something then people just accept it; in fact my overwhelmingly positive vibe and attitude when asked about what I do -when most people are ashamed off or have a sore spot over unemployment or being a dropout- causes people to want to know you further, they always start digging further into your past or future goals. The first time I responded to this question in a relaxed manor was after a few minutes of chat and she followed up by asking what my life's purpose is.... Gheez (just realising I should have rewarded her for asking me for chasing lol).
Anyway the flat chested bird turns up and its a tad bit awkward. Should have provably calibrated by apologising about that guy or at least not feeling uncomfortable and they leave. The next set we open is a large group of mostly Indians girls but were to the side speaking to two of them one on one. I barely do anything different, I just slow down as I have been and before I know it she's chasing me, tons of iois, and I'm just parroting key words. My verbal game feels like its twice as good and what's more by slowing down I allow myself time and space to think a bit more technically. We walk with the group to the dancefloor but it kind of dies out as we don't really maintain contact with them, a waste in hindsight.
My wing has to leave so I opened a girl who was being quite dismissive and I hear "I know you from somewhere". I turn and recognise her but it takes a while for us to figure out that we went to the same salsa classes in Camden. I try to number close but she resisted (I'll see you at salsa), I persisted and told her I probably wasn't going to go back to create a sense of urgency to no avail. I should have talked normally for a few minutes then made it urgent before I tried to close. It was too rushed because I wanted to leave, which was silly since the club was shutting in a few minutes. I could have stayed with the group and even left with them improving my chances dramatically.
Went to mc.D's alone.
Fin.
|
CHAT