Hard Work Beats Talent Day 0

Hello guys!

I am 21 years old male living in Bournemouth, UK. I have around 100 cold approaches and only 1 date from them. I am doing this journal to keep me motivated and to discuss with other members different aspects of the game. Recently I learned about a principle called 80/20 (Paretto principle). It states that 80% of the output or results will come from 20% of the input or action. It has been most popular in business management situations. For example: ''Businesses often found that roughly 20% of their customers brought in 80% of their sales. They found that about 20% of their sales reps closed 80% of the sales. They found that 20% of your costs lead to 80% of their expenses''. So I asked myself which 20% of the things I am doing are most important for me and give me most reward and happiness. I realised that if instead of going to the gym for 2 hours I could go to do some street approaches because it is more important for me to develop my game and social skills. I am going to write about both success with women and personal development because they are correlated.

The goals for my first week are:

1. To go out sarging 3 times and every time I have to open at least 16 sets which equals approximately 50 sets per week.
2. To chat up at least 3 girls from not-in-state-mood.
3. Also I will try to focus on my voice, sight and smile.

Some of the long-term goals:

1. To build bigger social circle - to find more friends (men and women) to hang out with.
2. To develop absolute confidence in all kind of social situations. I am confident only when I am in state. Sometimes I feel scared to approach (for example I am going to some shop and unexpectedly I see a hot girl but I don't approach because I am not in state and don't feel confident). I want to be absolutely confident and not to be anxious about social situations.

Tomorrow I will post to say how Day 1 was. If there is anyone in Bournemouth who wants to go out, private message me.

DAY 1 - I AM A PUSSY

I went out but didn't have the confidence to approach. It's very difficult when I am without wingman. I will work on my inner game tonight and I will try again as soon as I feel ready.

What you should ask yourself is WHY DIDN'T YOU?

Think of the "excuses" now, after the fact, as to why you didn't approach a girl and I will bet that they are all bullshit.

The problem was that I thought that I am not good enough. I thought that my life was not interesting enough, that I wasn't funny enough. I always said to myself: ''I'll start to approach girls when I develop my sense of humours and etc. '' This is very dangerous thinking and I think that many people fall into this trap. A lot of guys think that they should make money first or have a good body before they start chatting up random girls.

My frame changed entirely the very first second after I read this sentence: '' Whereas a non-needy man may talk about silly conversation topics, openly admit that he’s between jobs, but get very excited and passionate about his rock climbing hobby. '' I just realized that everything I do is great because I consider it so and everything I believe in is right because I consider it so. I may not be the funny guy or the rich guy but I will become that person if I decide so. At the same time I am absolutely okay to admit that I made a mistake because no one is perfect. I will talk about what I want, I will do what I want and I will go where I want to go because I consider it the right thing for me and for the people around me. If someone is not happy with that I don't oblige him to stay in my life. I have nothing to be ashamed of.

DAY 2 (04.07.2013)

So on the next day I went out around 7 pm with bigger confidence. Unfortunately, there were no many girls on the high street. I opened like 3 sets but they didn't stop. After that I saw a girl sitting on a bench. I walked up to her and said: ''Excuse me! You are very beautiful! I am Xxx, nice to meet you'' Then I sat on the bench next to her. She asked me straight away: ''How old are you?'' We had a normal conversation for 7-8 minutes. She was 17 years old russian girl. (I am 21) Then one of her friends came and said that she(the friend) had to kiss random guy on the cheek. I stopped one random guy and said to him that the friend wants to kiss him. She kissed him. At the end her group came, she gave me her number and I hugged her. We exchanged some text messages after that and I hope to see her in the next few days.

Note: Many people think that they should make the girl laugh hard. I don't think so. Humour is great thing but the most important is to make the girl feel comfortable and nice in your company. Humour helps a lot for that of course but don't focus on making her laugh too much. Focus on making her feel nice in your company.


DAY 3

I just opened one set directly during my lunch break but the girl was looking at her phone all the time so I just said bye and left.

P.S. Can you please correct me if I have many grammar and spelling mistakes.