Hey everyone.

I haven't been on the forums for a while, but recently I've been reading through some of the journals on here and decided that I want to start one of my own as well. To be honest, I already attempted a journal once the previous year, but ended up not posting anything I wrote since I thought it wasn't interesting enough and since I barely did any approaches, so there wasn't much to write about anyway. I'm hoping to stick with it this time.

Now, about me. My name is Marcin, I'm 26 years old, an introvert, apparently quite good looking, and my biggest passion in life is music (I'm a record collector, somewhat of a music nerd, and I also play the drums and have a band, but I'll probably write more about this later). I work 9 to 5 as a customer service rep for a multinational corporation, and I like my job. I'm currently in an open relationship and I live with my girlfriend. She knows I'm into pickup, finds it interesting and is very supportive, and she actually wants to see me have fun with other girls. So this is a very good situation, but there is also a downside: the fact that I can have sex with her pretty much whenever I want makes me feel too comfortable and makes me lose my motivation to hit on random chicks.

I started this journey in the year 2010. Since then, however, I haven't done many approaches - I just got a fun girlfriend and decided I was content with having one woman at a time.

But now I think it's time for me to get out of my comfort zone, have more women in my life and progress as a 'PUA'.

My initial plan is quite modest: each week to approach one girl a day on average. I plan on starting tomorrow. Let's see how it goes.

I thought it would be good to do some approaches on my way back home from work, but by the time I got off work it was dark and cold outside and there were barely any people on the streets, so even though I did a little detour to make my walk home slightly longer, I did not encounter any chicks I'd like to approach.

At home I ate, cuddled with my girlfriend, read some of the posts on here, and then - when my girlfriend got preoccupied with Minecraft - went for a walk, hoping I'd still manage to find some chicks to approach, even though it was 8PM already. Unfortunately, the streets were nearly empty, and it didn't help that I was stuck in my head the whole time, so even when some relatively cute girl did walk past, I'd just just look back after her and do nothing. After 1,5 hour of just walking around I went back home, so in the end I just had an uneventful walk... I like long walks, but that wasn't what I was hoping for.

Not the best start for my journal, but hopefully the rest of the week will be better.

Today was pretty similar to yesterday.

At 7PM I went for a walk. Made a couple of warm-up approaches, where I'd simply ask women for the time, just to get the ball rolling and to build some momentum, but I didn't follow up with any actual approaches. To be honest, I get killed by hesitation, and on the street often times even a few seconds of hesitation can cost an opportunity to approach.

Still, I can count this as progress from yesterday, since at least I did the warm-ups. But at this pace I'll be doing direct approaches by April at best

Also, I wanted to make daily updates to this journal, but I'm starting to think weekly updates would be better.

On Friday my best friend was supposed to throw a party, but there was a mix-up with the shift plan at his work so he had to postpone it. I felt sleepy after work, so decided to stay in this time.

On Saturday my girlfriend and I went shopping with the only female member of my band, and then in the evening we went to play some pool with another couple we are friends with. Afterwards we went to a small rock club where we chilled for a bit. The club was rather empty, but we did meet one girl from my girlfriend's choir. She seemed happy to see me again and her eyes were sparkling. My girlfriend later told me she asked this girl what she thinks about me, and she first got embarassed, and then said she thinks I'm beautiful. I've heard similar compliments from quite a number of women, but that got me thinking - if I'm so good-looking, why do I have any problems with getting girls and why do I hesitate so much on the approach instead of taking advantage of my looks?

At this point I think it would be good to give my girlfriend a nickname for the sake of convenience. From this pont onwards, I'll refer to her here as Shorty, since she's 151 cm tall (or rather, 151 cm short).

On Sunday Shorty and this chick from my band went to karaoke, while I decided to stay home, relax and do what I like best - immerse myself in music. I enjoyed listening to music by myself, but I did feel a bit bad that I ended the week without even a single approach.

On Monday I had to stay at work a bit longer, and then spent the evening relaxing in front of my computer, slightly bored, essentially wasting the day.

Today I had a rehearsal with my band and I have to say, I'm quite pleased with my current form as a drummer. My band currently consists of me, two guitarists and this one chick I already mentioned before, who was supposed to be our singer, but - since we couldn't find a decent bassist, and also since our music shifted closer towards death metal and she doesn't growl - moved to bass. They're all really cool people, but the one member of my band who I'll be writing more about is the chick, and I'll explain why.

Let's call this chick Sandra, since she looks kind of similar to Sandra Nasic from Guano Apes, except she dyes her her black and red. When I first met her, when she was looking for a drummer and I was looking for a band, I just thought she's a relatively cool person and didn't plan on picking her up, but after some time has passed I caught myself fantasising about her. Since I was just starting to read Mode One back then, I decided to just tell her that, even though she never gave me anything I could realistically interpret as an 'indicator of interest'. This turned out to be a good idea, as she just briefly tested if I had the balls to back up what I was saying, and when it turned out that I did, she said she'll definitely come home with me for the night... AFTER she dumps her chode boyfriend, because she sees herself as a good girl and has never cheated on a guy. Later on it turned out she was fantasising about me as well, and she said that she'd like to have a threesome with me and Shorty - this was especially cool since she was the first to suggest a threesome. The only thing in this situation I don't like is that I first told Sandra what I was really thinking in May, and it's January now, and although her relationship with her boyfriend is falling apart, Sandra still hasn't really dumped him. In fact, she likes the guy and is unwilling to let go easily, and there seems no way to seduce her before she becomes single. I mean, I tried to kiss her multiple times, but she turns away every time; I tried to just escalate on her to make her horny, but she's perfectly able to control herself and stops me as soon as she feels she gets too aroused. Well, it seems I'll just have to have some more patience.

So that's the update.

Gotta start approaching, for fuck's sake.