Approach #4: OC Girls.

Context.
I FINALLY found a friend into partying and going out! I invited him to go to a Brazilian party last Sunday night. The party was really nice, I had so much fun. I quickly started to speak to Brazilian sets even though there were no real target at the beginning of the party. In a single hour, I opened half of the room with openers going from "wait you guys are Brazilians? How great is that!" (in Portuguese with a huge smile) to "soooo you're in Paris but you spend the night staring at your smartphone" (opened two Australian girls like that). Unfortunately, there is no attractive single girl in sight... Until...

Report.
I left the two Australian girls to my wing as I went to the bar to get something. As I got there, I saw two amazing brunettes, extremely hot... I though there were Brazilian but they had this "attitude" French girls have sometimes... Since we had an eye-contact, I started talking:
ME - Are you Brazilian? (I asked in Portuguese, lame opener but I wanted to be spontaneous)
OC Girl 1 - What? (she didn't say that in a bitchy way, which made me confident)
ME - Oh I was asking if you guys were Brazilians... (eye contact, no shyness at all)
OC Girl 2 - oh no, we're Americans (wow I was not expecting this)
ME - Let me guess, Cali girls? (tone of their skin)
OC Girl 2 - yeah (they laugh)
ME - San Fransisco, L.A?
OC Girl 2 - Orange County actually.
That made sense... I was speaking to two amazing OC girls... It reminded me of the O.C (the TV show)
ME - wow that's cool... (I started to sing the OC soundtrack, they laughed)
OC Girl 2 - Are you staying here also? (it was a bar from an hostel)
ME - Oh no, I'm French, I live in Paris... I was invited by a Brazilian friend.
They started to ask me about good places to have fun at night in Paris, I was not really ready to answer to that kind of questions since I've been struggling myself to find some friends to go out at night but I answered their questions as well as I could. My drink finally came...
ME - okay guys I gotta go back to my friend over there (I wanted them to come with me)
OC Girl 1 - okay then, we'll see each other around...
ME - yeah sure, what are you guys name
OC Girl 2 - Chelsea (I introduced myself as well by shaking hands)
OC Girl 1 - Kylie (same)
ME - Okay girls, nice to meet you, we'll speak again later!

I wanted to open them again with my wing but I didn't see them in the party afterwards... I guess they left...

Result.
Opened the best set in the party by myself but didn't manage to do anything with it, I was not prepared enough, I'm still missing the basic spontaneous reflex but I still had an amazing night, I opened half of the party in several language, no social anxiety at all. I'm starting to get out more now and if I keep going like this, it won't last before I get results.

Areas for improvement.
- Use statements, less questions.
- Speak slowly (I tend to speak quickly when I speak English, allows me to hide pronunciation mistakes)
- Make them guess! Don't answer to their questions, make them guess, answer bullshit, be fun.
- Seed an event, they wanted to know a good spot to go out, let's invite them to go out damn it! lol
- Use body language to signify you're about to leave... as soon as they told me where they were from, I turned myself to them entirely.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

And they wanted to come back with you. . . but you didn't invite them. Girls do not travel overseas to drink by themselves and barhop on their own. They travel to meet and party with cool, open-minded International people so that they can pretend to be cool and International for the few weeks that they're gone from their boring and predictable lives.

If you're hosting a big party and a few people can't attend, it's not a big deal. Hey, you're the host and your the party. However, if somebody else seems to be having a big party but they don't invite you, it sucks. In Paris, you're the host and traveling girls are the eager guests. Avoid denying them their fantasies.

Your problem is not preparation. YOU ARE ENOUGH. You're a man, she's a woman...what preparation do you need? You have a great conversation with beautiful girls who enjoy your presence and you eject so early? Come on man, push yourself a little bit more. Don't false eject. Just don't. Stay there, plant your feet on the ground and don't listen to that voice in your head or that urge to get away from them. Seriously, you focus on the wrong things in your journal. Saying how your conversation of 20sec went (mentioning every line and word) doesn't help you at all. It's a 20sec conversation...there's nothing that you've done there..I have a real feeling that a lot of the stuff that you write is just for the sake of writing. You're always writing what you need to change, but you never change anything. Why? Maybe because you're too busy writing and thinking about what you can do. STOP the thinking, you already know what you need to do. Now ACT. Shut up and act...enjoy feminine energy and never take things personally. Go out and learn...fail...push your limits. GROW. As soon as you start feeling uncomfortable, tell yourself that you're growing. Say it in your head: "Awesome, I'm growing" And keep moving forward. Seriously, you're enough. Stop preparing yourself. Stop under-estimate your capacities. You're a man, she's a woman; your masculine polarity will do the job for you in terms of attraction..

_________________
Greatness is never borned

Quick Update.

I finally found a friend into meeting girls so I've started to go out a lot more lately and it's paying off little by little.

Pub Crawling with tourists.
Paris is a goldmine when it comes to meeting tourists. I love international environments but I had no idea where I could easily meet tourists in the capital. Well I found a good option... and now I had a wing after all. I went to this event last week and managed to be the life of the party... I met everyone, everyone knew my name, I was socially vibing. I was having fun, meeting Canadians, Australians, ... but unfortunately there was no interesting girls... but I love the field, I was playing home, speaking English, Spanish... When the party ended, they all turn to me to know what we do next... that was pretty funny.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Approach #5
Kiss closing an amazing Brazilian girl.

What an amazing night...

Context.
I had a really good experience last week at the international party... I was vibing but I had no real opportunity since there was no girls I liked. We decided to go back to this party this week. This time, the place was full of girls: Canadian, Slovakian, Danish and... Brazilians! I opened everyone, as usual, get social... I was playing home. I'm going to focus on the Brazilian girl I've kissed on this report.

Report.
As I came in the pub, I immediately noticed three amazing brunettes sitting at a table. I start to speak to several guys, introduce myself and talk to the organizer. He tells me they are Brazilians. I finish my interaction with him and walk straight to the table they are sitting in: "Are you guys Brazilians?". At this point I have already spoken to 5 to 6 people in the party, I know they noticed me and make them wonder, I have the upper hand. "From Rio or São Paulo?"... two lame questions that allowed me to start to speak Portuguese with them and tell a part of my story. I introduce myself, shake their hands, shake the hand of the guy that was hitting on them (I cock blocked him I guess) and left the set. I have all night to speak to them, no need to give them too much attention for now. I made them wonder.

I managed to get closer and closer using their camera and asking them to take some pictures. A lot of people where around them, they were the hottest girls of the party. I spoke their language and was playing my cocky and funny act. At some point, I managed to sit between the two most attractive girls to do a wine tasting picture. I framed it as "I'm trapped between you two guys, that's pretty scary" but I was in heaven... the poor guys around where basically taking pictures while I was having fun. I tried not to stay too much in the set though, going back to my friends, talking to other people.

I wanted to escalate but didn't really how to do it since there was no music at all. I was a bit stuck here, didn't really know how to break the rapport and escalate. Hopefully we ended up in a club. I had some difficulties getting my dancing game on tracks... Still a sticking point for me. But I was already leading her by the hand so it was time to kiss her. We danced, got closer... as I tried to kiss her lips, she offered the chick... I tried at least 10 times while grinding with her.

I was surprised. As was moving my hand in what I thought was totally appropriate, she would stop and stare at me with that "don't" look. Her friend was already making out with my wing right next to me. At some point, she told me "I'm not the kind of girl you think I am"... Damn it, classic shit test. Told her I don't think anything about her... I was just enjoying my time. "I know you've seen some things in Brazil, but I'm not like that"... What was the issue here? Attraction? Comfort? or was it basic ASD shit test? I comforted her "hey, calm down, everything's fine, we're just dancing" I reframed her as being nervous. Not sure about what I was doing actually. I had now my forehead against her, getting closer to her lips. Finally got the kiss I was longing for. We made out during 4 to 5 songs and headed outside of the club.

I was really happy about myself, she was extremely cute and funny. I enjoyed kissing her. I knew I couldn't go further for the night but I also knew she was staying a few weeks in Paris. I told her I wanted to see her again. I got her number sooner at the party. Took her hands in mine, we spoke a bit about what we could do. Told her I could take her out to do some sightseeing... I was really on that comfort building perspective but I didn't really know what to do. I didn't know if I was doing the right thing or just falling for a shit test.

Results.
I had a really good night, was the life of the party again, I had a lot of fun and managed to kiss close the most beautiful girl of the party. I'd like to see her again and go further but I don't really know what to do. Since we already are close, I'd like to take her out during the day and escalate from there. I have the feeling she won't go further without more comfort... but I'm not really sure about anything at that point.

Other facts.
- At some point a girl at the party I talked earlier called me a "charlatan" because I was speaking to a lot of girls... I guess she saw clear in my game and that was her way of shit testing me.
- Sometimes I feel like I'm using people to get what I want... and I guess some people see me this way since I'm vibing with everyone but not really connecting with some of them.
- Kissing her in the neck got me a really nice reaction

Areas for improvement.
- Compliment her to break rapport, I don't do that enough...
- Don't interrupt her, let her speak.
- Dancing game, I could do way better at it... more balls.
- I still give my "power" away to easily... especially when it comes to shit test.
- ASD... I just don't know how to deal with that...


I did all the work at that party, even got my friend to make out with a girl...

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Took a look at your "areas of improvement" section and saw a bunch of stuff i could improve myself too. As for dancing game it shouldn't be too hard if you do it in a Chief-kinda-compliance-ladder type. And just remember that you are the leader, you lead, she follows. It's dancing, it's excpected from you to lead. You determin the pace and frame of the interaction.

A quick question though: if you've already outamoged a guy from a set, why leave, even if it is only for a period of time?

Would love to sarge in Paris in summer too, guess i gotta stick with a more less international place. No harm though

Quick Update.

Here's a small update on the hot Brazilian girl I've met and my search for a job.

Hot Brazilian.
I invited her and her friends to a pub on Thursday night. Everything went well. We've spent the night making out and getting to know each other better... I knew I needed more comfort to go further with her. I think I did great, we had the opportunity to speak and have fun. I also started to "sexualize" our interactions... At some point I stopped kissing her, she looked at me and said "what?"... "I'm sure you know what...". When she told me I kissed well, I answered I could even do better. I clearly let her know I want to have sex with her but I couldn't bring her home that night for logistic reasons...

I also saw her yesterday with her friends but I was still stuck in the same spot... I can't escalate more... Every time I accidentally put my hand on her but, she would take it out for example. I let her know that I wanted to go further with her, she answered "I don't want you to have false expectation" but doesn't give me a no for an answer either... I don't like that, I'm losing the upper hand here while my balls are hurting me like hell... lol.

She's a great girl though, the kind I would date... she has wonderful face, love her eyes and lips... She's leaving on Wednesday and I don't know when I'll see her again. That sucks a bit. I've pushed it too far in the comfort zone, I'm gonna do a bit more push/pull and try to finally make her come home with me.

Job.
I've gotten an offer for a consulting company. Not my dream job to be honest but it's really well paid. I just really don't like this "golden boy" aspect of that kind of work. I'll give myself a few days to think about it, but I have no other options for now.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

I've been reading your journal for a while and it's been really inspirational. Congratulations on your job offer! I know it's not your dream job, but if the money is correct, you should accept it. It would allow you to get your own place and give you confidence and really improve your inner game. As for the Brazilian girl, why not just keeping escalating and give her the impression that you're the prize. Don't second guess yourself-just go for it. She's leaving soon anyway, so there's nothing to lose.

@kasabi.
I realized that indeed! A lot of girls come to Paris for a few days and would be glad to stay with a French guy... I can use Paris' image to my advantage. I'm trying to become a regular in some international parties to get to know more people.

@FlaiR_pua.
I usually do this, I quickly open and then eject in order to re-open them later. It allows me to get that "I don't care" attitude and create some intrigue... but I totally failed here... I didn't see them again at the party.
Indeed. Now that I have a wing I'm more eager to approach... Being able to make out with that amazing Brazilian was also pretty amazing to me. But at the same time, the Game has never really been a priority for me, what I want is getting my life in order.

@Hobbit.
I guess that's a bad habit I have. I wrote that because I have another opportunity that I like more but I won't be able to put the other offer on hold... I should be satisfied though, this will give me direction.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Quick Update.

Sooooo here's a small update about the actions I've taken with the Hot Brazilian girl.

Brazilian girl.
The issue was that I was stuck between the image of being a player (going to international parties to get laid) and the deadline (they were leaving on Wednesday). I managed to build comfort since I was sincere, I did like her a lot and she is definitely the kind of girl I would date... but I was afraid of missing time to go further so I pushed it a bit, clearly telling her that I wanted to have sex with her. Most of the time, we interacted through messages but we planned to see each other on Tuesday night.

I won't write the whole report since it wouldn't be really interesting but the closer I got to taking her home is when she told me "my friend would kill me if I come with you". I was making out with her, having fun and really enjoying the moment. My buddy was doing the same with her friend except that he didn't speak Portuguese which made it hard for him to get rid of that "player image" that was holding us back a little. We ended up the night drinking wine on the streets (apparently tourists think we spend our time drinking like that lol).

I couldn't go further with her because of logistics reason from her, she couldn't let her friends and was leaving the day after. It was a bit frustrating but again I had an amazing time. She told me she won't forget me. She liked me a lot too which was a bit surprising since I only knew her from a party a couple of days earlier. I guess we had a great chemistry going on. I'll miss her and the fun we had.

Job opportunity.
I'm taking the job. I'm just waiting for the contract. I'll start on October 1st, it will give me about a month of free time.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

thanks guys

_________________
yes I own this clothing shop good discount for all my brothers Http://www.bodfashion.com

Quick Update.

It's been a long time since I've written in this journal... but it's time to let you guys know what I've been up to lately.

Getting a Life.
October 1st. That's when I started to work. I obviously haven't a lot of free time since I've started but I'm still improving myself on a daily basis. I've had my first paycheck a few days ago, I'm pretty happy about not having to be worried anymore about money. Living in France also have its advantages... I have 7 weeks of paid vacation per year. I'm planning on travelling as much as I can.

Finding my Game.
Starting to work also had a unexpected effect on me. Now that I am spending my days in a closed office, I have a stronger desire to have fun and meet girls. I went to some Pub Crawls in Paris to basically meet tourists. I really enjoy speaking other languages and meeting a bunch of people. This is what I'm good at: coming in a room full of people and getting to know them. It's all about getting value in a given place and becoming one of the centers of attraction. Attraction comes when you've worked a room. The only negative point with that perspective is that I'm often perceived as a player... who basically speak to everyone but don't really connect with anyone. People distrust me sometimes. I'll work on this.

This journal.
I don't have enough time to write on a regular basis unfortunately... but it doesn't mean I'm not doing anything, or don't have a plan to improve my life. I'll just write approaches and field reports when I get an opportunity to do it. I'm actually not writing back at this time randomly. I've just had a really nice weekend in Barcelona with a pretty interesting gaming experience. I'll write the reports in the next days.

On a last note, I'd like to thank everyone who's been following this journal for a long time. I've recently met some of you guys in Paris and realized how awesome this community is.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Postcard 1: Barcelona.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Night #1.

Context.
It was 6pm when I arrived in Barcelona. I was a bit tired because of the travel though... I had to wake up at 5am this very same day (long story)... but I was really excited about partying with my friend. Paris sucks when it comes to night life. It just does. Everything is expensive, people are unpleasant and getting home is always an issue. We settle at our hostel and went out with the group for a Pub Crawl. It was a slow night though.

Report.
We were not a lot in the group, but I was already meeting everyone and building value has we were on our way. I was speaking Portuguese with the group leader, Spanish to another guy and English to everyone else. No target on sight though. We ended up in a pretty nice bar on the beach. Yes. A bar on the beach... Jesus... I love this city... An American blond stood out a little though... My buddy was speaking with her so I didn't interfere but talked to her friend who talked about The Stranger (from Camus), one of my favorite books. I didn't expect to be talking about existentialism in Barcelona...

The club we got into was amazing... It was right on the beach too which was pretty nice... There were some really beautiful girls in there. I knew night game was not my forte but I came with at least 10 people knowing me and hence allowing me to show some status. I had a safety net. I like safety nets.

My friend impressed me. 10 minutes in the club were enough for him to approach a damn to model. He killed me. He spotted a guy bothering a really nice girl and went to talk him out of it. He then told the girl "I told him you were with me so he won't bother you". Genius. I had this information afterwards though... I didn't understand what happened at the time and he blew my mind. He told me later he had the balls to do this because he was drunk.

It was my time to show some skills. I grabbed the American Blond and started to dance with her. She was cute and pretty sexy... but still a bit too fat for my taste. But whatever... We danced pretty close together. I was doing it right. At some point we stopped to join the smoker area... which was by the beach... We spoke a bit together. Her friends got in the conversation and I got pretty tired of it... I went back inside where I saw my friend kissing with this gorgeous Israelian girl.

At some point I joined him since he was by himself with her and her 3 other friends. There was room for me. One of them was really hot. I started to speak with them and introduce myself. I was pretty confident, didn't care about them being hot as hell. I introduced myself to them, couldn't understand any of their name... It was just Hebrew words lacking too many vowels. I had a target now though. My friend left the set, I did the same... Should have invited her to dance, I didn't. Hopefully they came a few seconds later to the dance floor, I approached.

I saw them dancing... and started to walk towards their direction. A huge dude from California who was in our group saw what I was up to... he started to follow me... I didn't appreciate it, I was already a bit nervous, didn't need a bear right behind me. I approached her, grabbed her arm and talked to her ear: "I want to dance with you". Why did I speak instead of act... Well to be honest it was to reassure myself... lol... I'm not used to to that kind of stuff... "I'm sorry I have a boyfriend". Damn, I wasn't expecting that... I should have but I went totally blank to be able to approach... I don't even remember what I said but it wasn't that good. I failed the shit test. I insisted, she told me "He wouldn't like it". The Californian bear right behind me asked me what happened with them... Well guess what happened buddy... I got rejected... that's what happened. He was being really annoying but I didn't say anything, I'm nice... and he was twice my muscle weight. haha. And to be honest, it didn't took me long to realize I was the one who left the set early... I should have stayed, get a conversation flowing or something...

Result.
I had a nice night, danced with a girl, approached another one but didn't really do good since I didn't insist at all. But it was okay. It was a good warm up night. I knew with a little more people I could do good. My friend didn't get more than making out though.

Areas for improvement.
- Act more. Speak less.
- Be more prepared for shit test as "I have a boyfriend".
- Stay in set... no matter what. Stay, speak, dance even after a rejection... stay a little at least.

Next night was way more interesting luckily

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Night #2: A-Game.

Context.
I had a lot of fun the night before and got home around 5 am. I woke up 5 hours later, I didn't sleep well but hell... I was in Barcelona... I wanted to enjoy the city. I took a shower and got out with my camera. At the end of the day I was dead tired though. I decided to sleep right before going to the Pub Crawl.

Report.
Hopefully, there were way more people than the night before. Again, I did my best to build value by meeting everyone. I've already met the majority of them the day before, I only had to start building value from where I left yesterday. We entered the first bar where a pretty nice DJ was playing. I was one of the first on the dance floor... I encouraged two British guys to join me. In a few minutes the dance floor was full and I had a huge smile in my face. Lot of people coming to me. That was great but I still had some people to meet.

As I was heading to the bar, I noticed my friend was speaking to two girls. One of them was really hot actually. Since he was by himself in a set of two, I joined him. I introduced myself to them... and started to speak to the cutie. She was German. We chatted for a bit. She smiled a lot to me... That was clearly an IOI. At some point she asked me to guess her age... I got it wrong... She was 18. The group started to move to the next place. I walked with her and started to escalate, touching her front arm, doing the claw when I was joking around with her... She had an awesome body. I decided to act as soon as I got in the club.

I left my jacket at the cloakroom and found her waiting next to the bar. "Let's dance". I grabbed her hand and started heading to the dance floor. At this point, I knew I already won. The music was so good... I love Barcelona... I was actually pretty impressed at my dancing skills... I was moving with her wonderful to the sound of music. I reached her lips and started to make out with her. I was on. I disarmed all the ASD: all the "I don't usually do this" "I'm not that kind of girl" "Am I not to young for you" became "You're cute".

Soon enough, I was getting bored of the repetition of our dancing moves. Told her I wanted to get some fresh air. We ended up on the beach. I sat on the upper march of a small stairway leading to the beach. She sat right in front of me. I had full access to her neck. We started to chat again, told her she kissed well and I'd like to see her again... I knew I couldn't get a SNL since she was in an hostel... and honestly, she was young, I was a bit undecided about all that. But I did like her a lot... she was extremely hot... and wearing a G-string. It's hard to focus when you have that kind of instrument in your hands. I only had one day left in Barcelona... could I see her again? I don't think so... but since she was living in France, she could visit me in Paris... Didn't know what to do. Got her contact to though. I kissed her neck which drove her crazy... I put my hand between her legs in a "I'm cold" way kind of move... I didn't dare go further because of her age.

The club was closing, I lost my friends. So did she. Grabbed my jacket, took a cab and got her to her hostel... and then to mine.

Result.
Everything went extremely smoothly. This night is definitely a keeper. I felt congruent, didn't hesitate, just went for it and jesus... she is gorgeous... she had an amazing body... so sweet. I was really happy to put my hand on that...

What I've learned.
- It's not really about the dancing/approaching skills but more about the congruence. If I feel congruent (in state, with enough value) I don't have any issue taking action.
- I have some not-so-bad dance moves
- Getting experience from one day to another is the best way to go
- I think I could get a girlfriend in a few weeks easily in Barcelona!

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)