How do you close the gap between your current self and the person you want to be? I know what I want or who I want to be. I see it in many role models or heroes from TV, movies or sports. I have small chunks of wisdom and knowledge. I also read a lot, like 80-100 book per year, but I'm stuck and didn't improve for like a decade. I made small changes, but nothing mind blowing.
No matter how much I work on my body or confidence, how much I convince myself that I'm a confident Motherfucker, I'm still the shy nerdy kid who is affraid to dance or who tries to be nice to girl. I think you can never overcome the barriers that your parents installed in you in terms of beliefs or behaviors from early youth. For rxample I am the nicest person, never stole anything, how the fuck could I all of a sudden become a thief or criminal? No amount of NLP. taking action or reading books could change the fact that I won't do it because I think it's wrong.
The same goes for women. I can't stop being nice to everybody or at least polite. I have never met a nice guy successful with women. Maybe good guys who are tough and edgie, but not nice polite boyscouts
Anyone with similar problems, I'm really frustretd
If you have read that many books then I'm sure you have read Models: Attract Women Through Honesty.
The main idea is that its not about being nice or a "bad boy" to attract girls. It's about being honest with yourself and what you want. If you are being polite to a girl because you believe she may not like your advances then you are not being honest to yourself and thus come out as deceptive and unatractive.
The book explains it much better than I can but understanding the idea is the easy bit. The hard bit is changing yourself to do what you want and not care what strangers or even relatives at times think of you.
I'm also struggling with that, it's hard to get social acceptance for being yourself when the majority of the time you have achieved it through trying to please others.
The two main things that I'm currently working on and are somewhat linked: Improving my personal life in terms of hobbies - I love to travel and learn new sports, and do them in such a way that exposes me to speaking to as many new women as possible. I've joined clubs and when I travel, I stay in hostels.
Haven't been very successful with girls yet, but doing things that I enjoy anyway at least keeps me happy and sane enough to keep trying.