1) I've learned to suppress the intellectual side while I'm with friends because people don't like to feel stupid.
2) my only plus is somewhat of a weak sense of humor.
3) Not only the low respect is a problem but when I bring a potential girlfriends to my social circle, they can sense the lack of respect and the whole thing falls apart.
4) The reason I'm posting this is that I don't really see how this can be changed.
5) The only other option I see is to turn into an arrogant asshole that treats people as inferior.
All other scenarios involve me pretending to be someone I'm not just to please people, and I don't think it's healthy or reasonable in a long run.
Well luckily you're in the right place!! Thankfully you're great at acqruring knowledge and that's what you need to do to improve your social awareness.
1) You're off to a good start! You have at least realized no one wants to feel stupid. Therefore you have to control your mouth around other people and rephrase things so that you are not insinuating other people are stupid.
2) Actually, intelligence is correlated with a good sense of humor. I'm pretty sure yours is weak because of your lack of experience in social situations. Once I get to know someone a lil I can make them crack at almost anything. As soon as I figure out someone is a goofball we literally will die of laughter because I "personality mirror" them.
3) If you change the way you treat the people in your social circle, their attitude will change towards you. People will generally mirror you. Have you ever noticed how if you move too far to someone's right or left when you're talking to them that they will turn to face you? It's that easy. And why would you introduce a female to a circle of friends if they will not have your back...?
4) It can be changed because just as you noted "people don't like to feel stupid/inferior" .... any other negative social behavior you have can be changed so that your result is different. You just need to figure out where you're going wrong and fix it.
5) Definitely don't do #5. Going back to #1 making people feel stupid or inferior will never be productive. You have to channel your intelligence in another way to win people over.
It's never about pretending to be something you're not. It's about bettering yourself and the realization that you have the control over your own mind and mouth and can direct yourself to do whatever you want to. Since your love of acquiring knowledge and anything else is so great, this should be easy for you.
I had to change my behavior bc I had the same effect on people. I'm still working on it. It takes yearssss... Start with some good courses on conversation. I always recommend Carlos Xuma Alpha Man Convo.