Once a lot of chicks, now chicks won't even notice me?



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PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 7:13 pm 
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Dear PUA's,

This forum has been a great help for me since I discovered it, therefor a big thanks to everyone who's contributing to this forum. Some of you guys just stun me with fine ass wisdom. But still I have some questions.

In the past I had great success when it comes up to hanging out with girls and doing stuff with em. Somehow I just attracted them without consciously playing the pick up game. It was just all natural to me and I always had some chick around me. But then...

I felt I needed some time for my self, just to focus on some personal stuff. I went all out in the gym and spend a lot of time studying for school. At this time I didn't go out a lot, it was just me, myself and I. (I admit , sometimes my ex came by and we did stuff, but it was nothing special, just some relieve :mrgreen: )

But now I feel like going out again, meet chicks and go on where I left before turning into a monk. I find myself empty handed. Wherever I come, girls just don't notice me anymore. I'm flirting with girls, but they just don't notice xD And when I approach girls, they act just cold. I never had this, man!

Do I somehow send a message to my environment that I am not available, or approachable?
What could it be why girls just don't notice me anymore?

I'm not a prick who's full of myself and I do not have a low-self-opinion, I dress well, look muscular, my teeth are still ok, and my hair is still fine :P I consider my self handsome, in a healthy way.

Pua's, I am not really needy or clingy, I would just like to have some fun again with some fine ass females.

Peace!


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PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 7:22 pm 
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You sound like every other client I've ever had.

Good looking, well built, and just can't figure out what the problem is. lol


Question: Was the time period in which you were getting women during school? High school college etc. ?

And is the time in which you are struggling, when school is out?

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PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 7:28 pm 
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Hahah, luckily I am not alone.
I had a lot of chicks in high school but after one year of college, it all passed me by.
Now I am in my last month of college, and haven't bust a nut for a while.

Can't figure out what the f the problem is :lol:

Thanks doc!


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PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 7:36 pm 
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High school is easy. Especially when you're in the "in-crowd". The underclassmen practically throw themselves at you. In college there is no real way to tell the difference. Everyones pretty much mixed in - especially if its a big school.

Whats your social circle like? And where are you approaching these women? Are you in a frat? Going to parties?

The overall problem is your mentality, but I'm trying to figure out if there are small things we can correct to put yourself in better position.

And what did this just start to bother you now? 3-4 years later.

Its like if you haven't played basketball in 3 years you'll be rusty once you step back on the court, but after a couple hours everything will start to feel natural again. Sounds like you just have to shake the rust off, but do it quick, because the longer you take the more rust will accumulate, and the more time will be spent shaking it off.

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PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 10:07 pm 
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I have a couple of friends I hang out with a lot, we have the same interest in producing music and like to go to rave parties. I also DJ at gigs. Got some female friends too but they are into different things, so I don't see them as often as I do with my crew..

Currently working in Amsterdam, seeing HB's daily and as I said, I flirt with them but they don't even give an eye. I do see myself as an open and social person, I like to speak with people and have interesting conversations with em, and that is why I can't understand why it doesn't work out. It's like my attraction is blocked even tough I am a very outgoing person, I know I have something to give. I smile and just chill, but it is starting to bother me that most of them just react cold.

I think I'm just not used to do anything to attract girls,

Thanks in advance !


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 09, 2015 10:17 pm 
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Quote:
I do see myself as an open and social person, I like to speak with people and have interesting conversations with em, and that is why I can't understand why it doesn't work out. It's like my attraction is blocked even tough I am a very outgoing person, I know I have something to give. I smile and just chill, but it is starting to bother me that most of them just react cold.
I had a similar thing happen to me in the past. I was outgoing, even fun to be around - then I went "in" to do
some soul searching, and when I came back, I found my "mojo" wasn't there anymore.

What I discovered was that the problem was in me "needing" girls to like me, on a subconscious level. Before
your experience of taking time for yourself, you were slightly DETACHED from women, not really caring
about them or their opinion of you.

But now, you have given that power away. You are walking around, with a sign on your forehead saying,

"I WANT A WOMAN"

It's like chasing a cat, the minute you step towards her, she runs away - just because she is a cat, and
that's what cats do.

So if you want to re-gain your mojo back, find your power again. Find what made you *YOU* before.

What gave you that spark? Was it a goal you were accomplishing? Was it living in a certain attitude?

Take some time and reflect back on it, remember what made you in what you were.

If you have some videos of yourself from before, watch them. Observe your behaviour, I guarantee
that you'll notice things that would never occur to you.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 10, 2015 9:05 pm 
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Dear PUA's, especially Black Phantom. Thanks.


Lately I have been taking some serious time to reflect on life on a deeper level. It was a bit of a storm this last couple of weeks, my frustration had it's peak, but the sun is shining again and I can actually laugh about it now.
Just like you said, I observed myself and found some very interesting stuff.

When I began focussing again on girls, It became too much of a priority. It made my personality vulnerable, with the result that, at some point, I felt insecure. Too much focussing on 'getting' and 'having' chicks made me look like some desperate clingy chump. At the time, I was not aware of this. I was not aware of the big sign on my forehead. But now I am and I begin to feel more and more relaxed about life and I am regaining my 'mojo'.

I stopped forcing myself doing things that did not feel natural to me, things that made me feel stressed. Because when I was vulnerable, I cared too much about what other people said and in desperation I made decisions under pressure, which later proved to be mistakes. It only prolonged my situation. So, after some serious time of reflecting and observing I can sit back and lounge, completely go with the flow. I developed a new mind-set and I feel good about myself again. Even started loving and appreciating myself more and more. With some amazing results.. The sign on my forehead is gone, it disappeared.. and lately I am starting to attract girls again.

Just like today.
Today I was some kind of magnet. Had so many eye-contact and flirted with a lot of chicks, even fixed some phone numbers without any effort at all. And it all felt so natural man.. And then this happens,

I was about to go home after a long day in the city when all the sudden this hot chick walked up to me and started to compliment me and shit, she even grabbed my arm and asked me if I want to go out for a drink or something. It was obvious this chick didn't want to leave without me, trying to fix me and boy, the shit she did and the show she put on, it was hilarious and crazy a/f, unbelievable, green eyes, booty, pierced lips.... So I kept my cool and realised the game was on again. Teased in a playful way, showed my worth so she had to convince me to go out with her, and eventually she did haha. This girl definitely didn't appear to me as some kind of desperate, frustrated chick in need, but more like a confident girl who knows what she wants.

So we went out and had a good time.. This stuff used to happen to me a lot before I turned into a monk, so I really consider this as some kind of good sign. But at the other hand I am also aware that I should not price this stuff to heaven, It is really funny, but my spiritual wellbeing should not depend on the validation of others.

Life seems so illogical sometimes, but now everything is falling into place. I am entering a new season. The subconscious mind is such a complicated, funny thing man. It has so many influence on the appearance and energy.

A massive thanks for replying guys. Keep up the good work!!


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