Hello Gentlemen,

So, lately I’ve caught a few episodes of The Bachelorette and another dating show called Take Me Out. Right now you may be laughing and thinking I’m a pansy. Here me out. Well, I’ve noticed some things.

On the show Take Me Out, one guy stands before 30 women to be judged. The women seem to prefer guys that are average to tall in height, attractive, and gainfully employed. No big surprise. They seem to detest guys who are blatantly arrogant and who dress flamboyantly. Granted, this isn’t a pick up type of situation. Nonetheless, I think it’s reflective of real life. Confidence is not the same as arrogance. Arrogance makes one appear to be a self-centered dick who cares only about himself. And, then these arrogant dicks are surprised when they don’t leave with a date. Really?

On The Bachelorette, there were some arrogant dicks as well. Did they win the woman’s heart? Of course not. Even guys don’t like guys who are arrogant dicks. When a person acts like they’re God’s gift, it is a huge turn off. Once again, maybe guys can get away with that in a club doing pick up. And, perhaps none of this matters if all you care about is getting laid.

I think confidence gets confused sometimes in the PUA world with being an alpha in-your-face kind of guy. I think a better definition of being confident has more to do with being sure of yourself. Confidence can be subtle. Confidence is leading, being strong, being decisive, having convictions and values you live by. Confidence is not arrogance, petty jealousy, or being a dick.

By the way:

Interestingly, a finalist in The Bachelorette named Jef Holm told reporters that he deliberately took things slow with Emily. He said,

"Every guy was going full steam ahead for Emily, surrounding and swarming her. That's not how I am with girls. I was the only guy who played it cool. I wanted her to know she'd have to fight for and pursue me, too."

So, I guess there was some game after all.

Any thoughts?

Peace,
Frankie

These shows are both heavily scripted.

Being the cocky type does have its perks over beta-male, but like milgram's experiments suggest no living creature likes being met with negative resistance constantly.

We as human being have the conscious decision to move away from the arrogant types that only offer negative outcomes. With that said we will make the correct choice instinctually to move towards a positive outcome.

The difference between being the dick type and being the coquette type are very slim to me. Leading up to a goal for me has always been to follow David D's steps of being the warm guy that sends IOI's and then going cold. Take one step forward and two steps back and the woman will close the gap.

We want what we put effort to achieve so if you are the one leading like a man should this game becomes child's play

There is a guy on this forum called poeticlyskuac. He has done some videos on alpha body language. And one thing I liked is that in his videos he talks about certain actions that are alpha, yet are turn offs in a romantic approach. I complimented him for taking the time to point out that difference. Some things are alpha and make sense in a business setting where they might build your status, yet in a romantic setting just make someone feel unsafe, rather than comfortable.

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