First off, Stormy, you've got this down to a T. The whole philosophy of self recognition/ inner actualization to be your own natural/guru. We all need to recognize that we do indeed have MASSIVE amounts of VALUE! We each have special, unique, and amazing souls! Its true. All we must do is realize it. We are all loved by someone, whether its our moms, dads, sisters, brothers, friends. PEOPLE LOVE YOU!

Second- Guys, I told my sis (or asked I should say) for her to get me Tolle, Power of Now for Christmas, ya thats right. Got it- ripped it- and it is amazing for inner game, not to mention other everyday bullshit. You can do the whole youtube thing with Ecky, but you don't get the "flow" so to speak as you do with the cds and its a lot more interpretable with the over all message he conveys.

That, with this thread... money. Thx Stormy. This should be a red splat sticky fsho! In a way, its scary to see everything you've known and been accustomed to forever start to shift but, I don't know.. it feels right. I definitely second the motion to get on board with Power of Now- some serious evolution going on.

Thirdly- this is the official quote of the day; Someone lay this to a beat!

_________________
Make Moves

Swoop

Credit where it's due: Hoobie coined the last line of that little piece (or at least he's the first one I heard say it). I just appropriated it.

And now that I think about it, I may want to take a second look at Hoobie's portion of Transformations.

Okay, for those of you who have never seen it, Transformations is an RSD product in which five RSD coaches (Tim, Ozzie, Jlaix, Hoobie, and Tyler) each give their takes on different facets of game. Preview action here:



Tim talks about attraction and vibing, Ozzie talks about closing and engame, Jeffy talks about inner game pitfalls and how pickup can screw you up, AND how to avoid it, Hoobie talks about a bunch of esoteric inner game stuff and the learning progression, and Tyler talks about motivation.

From what I've seen, Tim and Ozzie are consistently the most popular speakers in this program (Tim was so popular that RSD starred him in Flawless Natural, which is AWE-SOME). Tim's got a cool, fun style, and he talks about stuff that happens in-field. Ozzie's "method" is just balls-to-the-wall aggression, and he talks about stuff that happens in field. Watching him is awesome because you're like, "whoa, could I do that? Fuck yeah, I COULD do that!"

Jeffy's segment is dark. Even he's said so. And I've got to say, it was strange having watched Jeffy Show first, which is so lighthearted in parts that it's almost standup comedy, and then watching this. It's like going from A New Hope to Empire. Yes, that was a Star Wars reference.

Hoobie's segment is a bunch of rather esoteric inner game concepts that a lot of guys (myself included) have a hard time finding concrete application for.

Tyler's segment is about how to learn. And he deliberately polarizes the audience at a couple of points.

So because Tim and Ozzie are the only ones that talk about anything even close to "tactics," they get most of the attention.

But maybe it's time for me to review Hoobie.

_________________
http://www.makeherchaseyou.com/ <- Free 10-Day Bootcamp from Herbal
http://www.bristollair.com/outer-game/s ... ibing.html <- Tyler Durden on Vibing
frame-control-defining-reality-and-bei-vt34530.html

Stormy, I never thought I'd meet anyone else who games almost exactly the same way I do. The only possible difference is that I come by this naturally, I can't control it and there have been times when I probably should have. Case in point: I dropped by a Meijer's (food store) in mid Michigan to buy a bottle of wine. This 23 year old blond hottie cashiere asked me for some ID. I'm 58. I immediately accused her of trying to pick me up. She turned beet red and while she was laughing she managed to say "no I really do need to see some ID." My response? "Its OK. You don't have to pretend any more. There are a lot of younger women who like older guys. There's nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about." yada, yada, yada "What time should I pick you up tonight?" Given today's legal environment, this could have gone very wrong.

I know, I know. I'm bad wolf but I'm just so darn good at it.

_________________
HLTW
*********************************
And the hunter shall become the hunted.

I've had flashes of that before getting into pickup, and like you, I've never been able to control it. Except in my case, I've wanted to switch it ON and been unable to. I'd get into a sudden, heavy flirting session with a girl, and freak out. I wouldn't know what to do. I thought that if I pushed I'd lose her.

Turns out I was losing girls left and right because I WASN'T pushing. I just needed to get used to the vibe.

Good news is, I think I've broken it down so that I understand it, and I can now turn it on at will.

'nother post coming soon, kids. I just have to figure out exactly what I'm going to do it on. In the meantime, though:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcoDtCjf86M[/youtube]

Google the lyrics and sing along.

Also, Duran Duran for the win.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2brXlRo5ZtU[/youtube]

_________________
http://www.makeherchaseyou.com/ <- Free 10-Day Bootcamp from Herbal
http://www.bristollair.com/outer-game/s ... ibing.html <- Tyler Durden on Vibing
frame-control-defining-reality-and-bei-vt34530.html

Stormy,

As I continue to read about PU and examine my own behavior, most of PU comes down to demonstrating that you have

balls. Direct approach takes balls. Opening sets takes balls. Shit tests are only passed if you have the balls.

Getting her to comply takes balls. Having the audacity to believe I can have any woman I want takes balls. Being

willing to walk away from a HB takes balls. Calling a HB on her bad behavior takes balls. If you look closely at

these forums it becomes apparent that every time you open your mouth in front of a target you have to be

demonstrating that you have balls. Imagine that! It is just the opposite of being a needy wuss and if you have the

balls it shows in your personality. All the routines and canned openers don't matter. They are simply crutches

and if they aren't delivered correctly or worse, if this is the fourth time she has heard the opener, they will

come across as a sign of neediness. She already knows why you are there and I'm sure she knows why she is there.

You shouldn't need canned lines to start a conversation.

Even this thread is almost all about balls. Some of the specifics you mention are very insightful, even humorous

but it all seems to come down to demonstrating that you have balls and (pay attention guys - this is a very

important part) you are not acting like a complete jackass just to prove you have balls but you are successfully

communication that you've got em.

_________________
HLTW
*********************************
And the hunter shall become the hunted.

KINO

I always knew that kino was important.

Waaaaaaay back in July of '07 when I was reading The Game at a feverish clip after having found it, I saw the Layguide mentioned in the first few pages of the book, right near the beginning of the "Meet Style" section. I saw that it was an online document, closed the window that the .pdf file of The Game was in, and Googled that beast.

http://www.pickupguide.com/layguide/

Even though it hasn't been updated in a while, what with the book version of the Layguide going on sale, it's still got a bunch of really cool stuff in it. One of the really cool things was kino.

http://www.pickupguide.com/layguide/kino.htm

Reading about this was my first "holy shit, DUH" moment. You have to touch girls in order to pull them. This should have been obvious as hell to me, and when I read it, it made perfect sense. Girls were always touching ME when they were attracted to me. Maybe they wanted me to touch them back? Of course!

A QUICK TRIP INTO THE MIND OF STORMY

That last paragraph will make more sense if you understand where I was coming from at the time.

When I hit the intertubes after getting dumped by Final Ex, looking for pickup-related stuff, what I was really looking for was what I now know to be a list of IOIs. I took it for granted that some girls were attracted to me. I had a bunch of girls in my social circle, and I knew that there were girls that I just knew casually - I didn't know WHO, but I knew they were there - that wanted to sleep with me.

What I wanted to know was how to figure out who wanted me and who didn't. The way I saw it, a girl was either attracted to me or she wasn't. I wanted to know who I could "safely" escalate on. I thought that the whole idea of openers and whatnot was silly; I've got a ton of girls in my social circle! Why would I need to talk to girls I don't know? MAKING a girl attracted to me if she already isn't so? PFFT. Nonsense. I'll just pick off the easy targets, thank you very much.

Anyway, when I read about kino for the first time (later in The Game, when Sin was training Style up during Mystery's workshop), something just clicked. I knew this was important. Every time I had slept with a girl, there was kino beforehand. My belief was reinforced when I read in the Layguide there that kino is the difference between getting the girl and not getting the girl.

So I've always been a big kino advocate. And I've been appalled by how little attention this subject is given in various and sundry pickup methods. Until I saw Ozzie's portion of Transformations, I didn't think that anyone really did the subject justice. Mystery and Style had a few kino routines, but I never thought they were enough. And when I saw Mehow do some kino compliance tests in an in-field video, I thought that the whole thing looked stupidly contrived.

I was like, "what? My kino is better than Mehow's!" No disrespect to Mehow, by the way. He WAS just demonstrating a routine, so it would inevitably come off as at least somewhat "engineered" and not completely natural. Hell, that's why he was being filmed: to demonstrate that routine.

You all have read one lay report from me in this thread, and a little bit of a makeout report. My first makeout after getting into the game, as well as every makeout and lay since then, has involved enough kino to sink an aircraft carrier.

Well, I thought, I can keep bitching about the neglect, abuse, and SPAM of poor kino in the seduction community, or I can give this subject the love, attention, and praise it deserves. So here goes.

THIS ISN'T INNER GAME, STORMY. THIS IS CLEARLY OUTER GAME.

Shut up. No it's not. Kino and inner game are linked about as tightly as they can be.

You can fake disinterest during an opener. You can pop off FTCs all day. You can neg, disqualify, takeaway, all that. When you lock in, you can fake a smile, consciously crank up your vocal projection, slow down your speech, and even keep your voice from cracking. When it comes to vocal game, you can fake it till you make it.

But you can't fake solid kino.

This is where the rubber meets the road. This is where you get hit with a congruence test that you've got no way to consciously react to.

Oh, yeah, if a congruence test is verbal, you can spit back some canned line to deal with it, or ignore it altogether or something. You can actually fake that the congruence test didn't affect you internally in any number of ways.

But you can't fake solid kino. This is where your inner game truly shows on the outside.

The girl is going to be passively looking for a TON of things about your kino that it is absolutely impossible for you to consciously micromanage. She'll notice if you're sweating. She'll notice if your hands are clammy. She'll notice if you're shaking. She'll notice if you're fidgety.

And you can't skip this. You don't kino, you don't get laid. You have to run this gauntlet, and the only way to make it through is with good inner game, or at least enough situational confidence to pass for good inner game.

Remember my super-stripped-down progression from earlier? Kino is vital to phase two of that:

Open -> Pump BT/Defuse ASD -> Close

...and kino IS phase three of that.

Open -> Pump BT/Defuse ASD -> Close

I'm sure you all are familiar with Vin DiCarlo's kino escalation ladder. If not, http://www.directnaturalgame.com/Techni ... adder.html

While I don't think that following the ladder step-by-step is necessary, and I DEFINITELY don't think that memorizing it is helpful, I do think that it's good for illustrating a point: pickup is kino escalation. Why are you talking to this girl in the first place? Because you want to kino the inside of her vagina with your penis. Hell, you can get less kino than that (BJ, makeout, etc.) and it's still a damn good night. One might say that the "success" of a given night depends not on how many sets you open or how many IOIs you get, but on how much kino happens. Kiss is good, makeout is better, sex is awesome.

I know that making out with a girl makes ME happier than getting an IOI from her.

What you're ultimately trying to do during a pickup is touch the girl more. That's what it boils down to.

BAD KINO

Remember the Golden Rule of Natural Game? Whatever you feel, she feels. If you're feeling nervous and weird, the girl is going to feed nervous and weird right back to you. And your feelings are transmitted most clearly through your touch. The music and lights in a club may drown out visual and auditory cues that you give, but your kino will always project, loud and clear, what you're feeling on the inside.

Before I got into pickup, I was actually convinced at a few points in time that I was haphephobic. I really, really did not like people touching me. I'm not going to psychoanalyze myself to figure out why this was the case, but the second a girl touched me, my guard always went UP. I knew that she wanted something from me, and it wasn't necessarily for me to touch her. In my cynical, jaded worldview, the girl was using the hint - not even the promise, but the hint - of sex to get me to do something for her. And she wouldn't be using that hint if it didn't work on other guys.

"Well, screw that," I thought. "I'm not going to be like other guys. Girl touches me, I know I should trust her less." This attitude would continue with individual girls until I actually trusted them.

In my pre-pickup days, my kino was absolute crap because I usually didn't kino at all. And whenever the girl touched me, that cynical I-don't-trust-you vibe flowed like electricity right from me into her. Especially when I froze up and physically removed myself from her touch.

That's what bad kino looks like. Or rather, that's what the extreme of bad kino looks like.

NOT QUITE AS BAD KINO

I understand that when a lot of guys first get into pickup and learn about kino, they employ something called the Purposeless Hand of Doom. I've never done this, as far as I know, but I've heard of it.

You all have probably seen AFCs doing this. It's the stereotypical hand on the lower back that doesn't move. But that's not the only form it can take. It can also take the form of touching a girl on the shoulder or something for absolutely no reason. Like, there's just no connection between the vibe of the interaction and what that hand is doing. It's weird, and it's not good.

This is a result either of miscalibrated AFCs trying to claim the girl as their own after having just met her and being needy due to scarcity mindset, or miscalibrated newbies knowing that they're supposed to kino without quite knowing how or why.

GOOD KINO

What makes kino good? First of all, YOU'RE comfortable with it. You know that the girl will be receptive because what you're doing is completely normal.

Second, it fits the vibe. There's a reason for it to happen. This is where things can get seemingly illogical: I kiss girls out of absolutely nowhere. This fits the vibe better than a lower level of kino out of absolutely nowhere. If the flirty vibe is on, a totally random kiss is normal, or at least not weird. If there's a lesser, more casual vibe going, then kino doesn't make sense without a logical reason. In the flirty vibe, though, emotions rule.

This game is emotional. It is not logical.

It all comes back to the vibe.

HOW TO GET COMFORTABLE WITH KINO

This, thankfully, is pretty easy. Just practice touching people. Now turn off the creep alarm that just went off and pay attention.

Physical greetings: do you greet people verbally, and verbally only? Put some kino into it. High-five. Hug. Respek Knuckles (also known as the "terrorist fist bump," "dap," or whatever you kids are calling it these days).

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=geZSBEi9afo[/youtube]

If my hands are full, I'll use my elbow. "Gimme some elbow, dawg." Hooray! You now greet people more personably!

What you might notice after doing this a little is that you suddenly find your social confidence going way up. By which I mean, you'll find your fears shed and your interactions clarify. Everything will just flow a little bit better. That's because you've just shed a totally irrational fear and you're seeing the world unfiltered by it. You just cleaned a piece of dirt off of your windshield.

Incidental kino: I don't mean this the same way that DiCarlo does. What I mean by this is situations where it just makes sense to touch people, and NOT doing so would be weird. The first example gets its own big, bold topic heading because it is MASSIVE and HUGE and AWESOME.

THE CLAW

Formulated by Tim of RSD in a flash of brilliance no less significant in scope than Isaac Newton realizing that the force behind the falling of an apple was the same force that caused celestial bodies to move across the heavens, The Claw has been used throughout the ages by alpha males wishing to both establish their dominance over someone AND comfort them.

The Claw is elegant in its simplicity and earth-moving in its effect. Its speed is like the wind, its stillness like the calm of a forest. It moves through resistance like fire, and is itself as immovable as a mountain.

Look upon The Claw in all its glory.



Check out Colin Farrell giving some love to some hotel chick. Awww. Hey, he's an alpha. He's got time for everyone. Note the position of his hand: he's reaching around and grabbing her by the shoulder. That's The Claw. Quite simple, really. And it communicates everything you want to communicate if done correctly.

Want to see more of The Claw in action? Watch virtually any mafia movie, especially one directed by Martin Scorsese (or Robert DeNiro, if you include A Bronx Tale, which you should). You'll see swaggering Italian-American gangsters throwing The Claw around with reckless abandon, on EVERYONE. Girls, each other, guys that owe them money, random bystanders, EVERYONE.

The Claw always wins.

HOW TO GET COMFORTABLE WITH THE CLAW

The easiest, most situationally appropriate, and probably most common use of The Claw is in a loud venue.

Girl: "Blah blah blah"
You: *Claw* "Wait, what?"

If you don't hear something, Claw the speaker in and have them repeat themselves. Don't just peck in and give them your ear; put The Claw on and give them your ear.

It makes sense to be close together in this circumstance. You're two people trying to talk in a loud venue. Merely pecking in to avoid touch would be weird because it involves deliberately avoiding touch when it would just make sense to go ahead and touch. You are NOT so uncomfortable with physical touch that you avoid it. Hell no. If you need someone to repeat what they said, you put The Claw on them.

There, two birds with one stone. The Claw will increase the amount of kino you use in set, and it gives you a way to deal with loud venues. Meditate now upon the glory of The Claw.

OTHER USES OF THE CLAW

You: *Claw* "Hey, look over there!"
You: *Claw* "Let me guess. You're the bad girl, right?"
You: "Hahaha, you're adorable. C'mere." *Claw*
You: "You're awesome. I'm keeping you." *Claw*
You: *Claw* "Hey."

You get the idea. The Claw's diversity of utility is vast. If you aren't hugging within one minute, or at least Clawing within thirty seconds of opening, you aren't using enough kino, and you should start.

OTHER INCIDENTAL KINO

There are lesser forms of incidental kino that can help you get comfortable touching people more.

Here's your change: whenever you buy something and the cashier hands you your change, let your fingertips brush theirs a little when you get your change. This is another example where there's just a practical reason to touch someone and NOT doing so would be weird: trying to take something being handed to you without your hands touching is awkward and could result in you dropping whatever it is you're being handed. So don't avoid it. This goes for cups of coffee and whatnot too.

And you may even find yourself picking up unexpected IOIs from baristas, bartenders, and checkout clerks doing just this.

Crowd sliding: Instead of bobbing and weaving like Dave Elsewhere to move through a crowd without touching anyone...

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ykmj_IVLQ1k[/youtube]

...save your liquid action for the dancefloor and lightly place your hand on people's shoulders as you move past them. They'll usually get the hint and move out of the way slightly. You'll move through the crowd easier and get used to kino.

Fun story related to this: I was at an outdoor concert this one time, watching the Molly Ringwalds...

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GkVU-KNJch8[/youtube]

...when some fifty-something Hispanic woman who was kinda drunk slid past me through the crowd. She wanted to talk to someone who was standing right in front of me, and was holding my arm a little to steady herself as she did so. She wasn't even paying attention to me. That's how comfortable with kino this woman was, at least at the (drunken) time: she was holding my arm and didn't even know I was there.

When she got done talking to whoever it was she was talking to, she turned around and started walking back to where she was before, but forgot to let go of my arm.

So I followed her, with a smirk on my face.

A few steps later, she realized that she was holding someone's arm, turned around, and looked at me, and saw me smiling. We both laughed for a second.

And then we made out. Instantly. Because hey, why not. Then she told me not to follow her because she was going back to her husband.

I am a filthy, dirty motherfucker.

So now you know how kino works, and you SHOULD understand that, once again, you don't get better by adding things, most of the time. You get better by subtracting them. If you don't have enough kino in your game, the solution is not to simply add more. The solution is to get rid of your fear of kino so that you do it more without even thinking about it. When you're comfortable with it, you'll find yourself dropping loads of well-calibrated kino without even having to think about doing it. It'll flow straight from your core and manifest itself in what you do, uninhibited by fear.

That's how ALL of natural game works. When you get in the zone, you don't have to consciously "do" anything. It all flows on autopilot. Your masculine core is drawn towards the girl's feminine core. No thought. All feeling.

_________________
http://www.makeherchaseyou.com/ <- Free 10-Day Bootcamp from Herbal
http://www.bristollair.com/outer-game/s ... ibing.html <- Tyler Durden on Vibing
frame-control-defining-reality-and-bei-vt34530.html

Thank you Stormy. Your post has been really helpful. I joined this site thinking that it could help me become a better me. Sadly, the stuff I was reading, though a lot of it applicable, did not seem to further this cause. It seemed to me that it was just stuff being thrown on to make me look better. This is not what I want. I heard of inner game a few weeks ago, and really liked the concept. When i saw the inner game section, I had high hopes. Your post certainly fulfilled them. It has made me realize what I need to be focusing on is my inner game. I will definitely look into some of the methods you mentioned. Thank you for all your help, and please continue the good work.

I can totally identify with that.

Regarding life in general, I started transforming my mindset to a more positive one this past summer... and I'm still working on it. I read The Game a couple months back and I just started coming to the forum and trying to get serious about actually applying what I'd read about a week ago.

I read the whole thread up to this point in one sitting. My brain fucking HURTS, but in the most awesome way possible.

Inner game, at least to me, is so important. And this thread is a thing of beauty. Cheers, dude! Hope your paper turned out well, too.

_________________
Live Your Truth.

Heh. Wow. I wonder what it would be like to read this thread all the way through, from the point of view of someone who ISN'T me? I mean, it's kind of different going back and reading this thread from my point of view, because this is stuff that came from my brain and so is already there. I dunno.
Paper turned out fine. It was a grind getting all the pages done, and I have to admit that I used a little bit of margin and font voodoo in order to get it above the THIRTY PAGE minimum, but I got 'er done and turned 'er in.

_________________
http://www.makeherchaseyou.com/ <- Free 10-Day Bootcamp from Herbal
http://www.bristollair.com/outer-game/s ... ibing.html <- Tyler Durden on Vibing
frame-control-defining-reality-and-bei-vt34530.html

i don't like direct game, mystery's method is better

This thread's still near the top, so I figured I'd post another reply.

First off, Stormy, nice that you got the paper in on time and over length. I remember the margins trick from my undergrad days. Some profs explicitly prohibited it in their syllabuses (syllabi?)

Second, I'm trying to use some of this stuff out now, but I've got a long way to go. I used to hardly kino at all, with anyone ever. Trying to use the claw and kino more in general, but it doesn't work if it isn't natural... which is where inner game comes in, and...

Third (why am I numbering this?), I've been thinking a lot about the concept of my ego as "smoke," invisible and impenetrable. Sort of following that concept of transparency, I started thinking of any anxiety, discomfort, awkwardness, or bad vibes in a set (of any people, not just HBs) as solid walls that needed to be broken down and evaporated so that positive energy could flow freely.

It's tough to get rid of habits and patterns formed over 20+ years, but at least now I'm a) conscious of them and b) developing new thought processes to replace them.

In short, nice work coming up with the Smoke Ego. I'm going to reread parts of the thread and see what else I can get.

_________________
Live Your Truth.

This is by far the most influential threads ive read since I joined this community. I've been using indirect game for a while and although im not solid yet, I've continued to keep faith in it. However this thread has made things a lot clearer for me and I'm almost completely convinced that natural is the way to go. I'll definitely be testing it out this weekend.

THE WATCHWORD IS "NORMAL"

I got into the field for a proper night of "sarging" for the first time in months this past Thursday. I haven't been able to go out much, and when I do, I'm usually not "gaming." Rather, I'm just randomly interacting with everyone, moving people in and out of the group of friends I roll with, and occasionally closing girls who strike my fancy. I don't define "targets," I don't use community-approved routines or openers, and my focus is just on having fun. Effectively, I run extended social circle game when I go out.

I don't need to "run game" in that headspace. I have fun, I pull people into my party so THEY can have fun, and attraction just flows naturally from that.

But this past Thursday, I had work off the next day, I had a wallet full of cash, none of my friends could make it out, and I decided to hit the town, on my own, for a true night of solo-sarging. Old school. I wasn't just out to have fun; I was going out to pick up.

It felt weird.

At the beginning of the night, I had a sudden, massive attack of approach anxiety that stuck with me the entire night. This NEVER happens when I go out anymore, but it happened Thursday and then again Saturday. And it didn't take me long to figure out why. It was because I wasn't doing what I normally do when I go out. I was putting pressure on myself to "do approaches" instead of just mingle and interact. That messed me up.

"Sarging" feels weird. Scoping a room for "targets" with intent to "open" one of them feels weird. Having to think at all feels weird. For crying out loud, I'm OUT in a CLUB. This is neither the time or place for thinking. You're supposed to have fun in clubs. If you aren't, then something is wrong with you and the girls can sense it. You're not bringing any party with you, you failed to check your hangups and insecurities at the door, and you're "running game" instead of having fun. You're a walking ego.

This combination of factors adds up to approach anxiety, weirdness, and fail.

WHAT I DID WRONG

My biggest mistake was just failing to build momentum. Normally, when I go out "to have fun," I'm in a happy headspace that I know everyone around me is going to want to be a part of. I'm money and I know it. If I screw up, which I will, I don't care. I'm not perfect. Either deal with it or forget about it and move on.

But when I took off my Party Boy Natural hat and put on my PUA hat, something bad happened. I became a perfectionist. I started caring if I screwed up and alienated or weirded a girl out. In case you all aren't aware of how much of a shit I usually don't give, I once opened a girl by saying "holy Christ, I wanna fuck that" while staring at her ass as she walked by. 'course, the girl was wearing fuck-me boots, fishnet stockings, a thong, and a corset, so I was pretty sure she'd take the validation with a smile. Which she did. And it worked because it came totally off the top of my head, and was totally congruent with what I was feeling at the time. I didn't consider it a "direct opener," an "SOI," or even the beginning of a Shock and Awe loop. I considered it a simple statement of fact.

But when I went out to "be a pooah," I was fucked. I couldn't feel my usual fire. It seemed like everyone else was having more fun than me (which they were) and I felt like any approach I did would be pure value-sucking. I noticed approach invitations (if you start looking for them, you'll notice that you actually get A LOT of them), but dismissed every one of them as coincidental. "Naah, she's not really interested in me."

Which makes no sense because most approach invitations are SUPPOSED to look coincidental. The girl is trying to get your attention without being obvious about it.

Normally, I'd just open any pretty girl that came near me just in case she was actually giving me AI. A lot of them aren't, and I still didn't care. Even if I considered a girl in a club not liking me to be a "problem," I could still lord it up hard enough that I'd get enough social proof to overcome it. I've had a couple of girls who blew me out re-approach once they saw that everyone else in the club liked me.

But that's not what I was doing. I was full chode. Every girl I saw, I thought up a reason not to approach.

WHAT I SHOULD HAVE DONE

What I usually do: make it my goal to be as obnoxious as possible. The last time I went on a real rip-and-tear, I was ordering people to high-five each other, organizing spankings as punishment for party fouls, getting girls to make out with each other, and generally MAKING everyone around me party as hard as I was. And sure enough, I wound up sleeping with two girls I met that night within a week of meeting them.

Oh, hey! It's someone I know! What is the proper greeting?

a) handshake
b) hi
c) 'sup

If you guessed any of the above, you were wrong. The way I was greeting people that night was by slapping them on the ass. Every time I saw them. Yes, the guys too. I explained to the (extremely predictable) AMOGs who tried to tool on me for this that it was not gay... through extensive use of the word "bro." It worked. Brocedure, brotocol, broponent... they just couldn't stand up to my use of such words.

No logic. No thinking. All fun. That's what gets me laid.

I am NOT a pickup artist. I am a guy who parties his ass off, attracting a crowd in the process, and fucks the girls in that crowd. Having fun feels normal in the best way possible. There's this sense of "yeah, this is how things are supposed to be." No approach anxiety. Every approach is fun as all hell, even if I get blown out. When I'm in state, blowouts are HILARIOUS. If I get that "omg, like, whatEVER" response when I come in with something insane, I take it as an opportunity to playfully bust on the girl that couldn't check her baggage at the door, then abandon her for a girl who DOESN'T suck. In a bad way.

I know, from personal experience, that there is no chemical I can consume (that I would be willing to consume - caffeine, alcohol, nicotine, and THC are the only drugs I use) that can get me into state. It's all mental.

Or more precisely, it's all emotional.

This game is emotional.

It is MOST DEFINITELY not logical.

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frame-control-defining-reality-and-bei-vt34530.html

Great Post. Spent a few hours digesting this whole thing. Great Post. Bump. Read it people, then re-read it, and read it again.

Haven't been on the forum in a little bit, and that last post was money, Stormy. Your point about not thinking in the moment logically makes sense. (Ironic?)


I used to be a natural at two points in my life. One, when I was a little kid. I was a performer, an introducer, a negotiator. Things happened, social anxiety. Somehow my latter years of high school and first semester of college, I managed to get this mentality back before another major life event came and I lost it again. I've been working to get my "self" back recently, through both the game and other things in life.

I thought I had a question, but maybe it's more of an addendum to Stormy's point about normality.

People talk about comfort zones like those zones are always bad, like they don't exist for a reason. People say that you have to step outside of your comfort zone to get what you really want, AND THEY ARE RIGHT... kind of.

Comfort zones are good things; it is when you are in your comfort zone that you are able to "do" without "thinking." Instead of JUST stepping outside your comfort zone, what you should do is expand your comfort zone. If your comfort zone were measurable, say it's a 7. What you want is located in 8. The first few times you go to 8, it is going to feel awkward and uncomfortable, maybe to an extreme. And if whatever "8" is has a range of outcomes, your first some won't be favorable. However, over time, your begin to feel comfortable going to 8. Your comfort zone will eventually go to 8. This is the very reasoning behind the idea of confronting the things that fear you; eventually you won't fear them anymore.

But not everything outside your comfort zone is a fear. It is just additional information that your brain isn't "used to," and so it gets processed before you have time to act. So Stormy's point about normality stands. Because we all operate more smoothly and more efficiently in our comfort zones, doing the things to which we are accustomed. We are in the right state of mind.

This dovetails Stormy's point to conventional PUA wisdom. (ie. if it ain't broke, don't fix it; if it is broke, do fix it.)


As a side note, I noticed a "Worthwhile Thread" sticky on the main forum. I'd be in favor of adding this epic beast. I should actually read/watch it again.

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