Lacking Support for Goals?



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PostPosted: Tue Jan 07, 2014 7:40 pm 
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I want to lay out my current situation for you and get your thoughts on my plans.

Currently I am living what many would call a very comfortable, stable, safe life in a quiet little suburb near the city.

I am thankful for the safety and stability my parents provided for me in my upbringing and their love and support.

However, this quiet, safe life is about as stimulating as a nap on the couch, and as such very uncomfortable for a man wanting to explore and experience the world.

Even the city I live near lacks life. I often call it a dead city, the main street is practically a ghost town, vacant buildings and corporate offices line what was meant to be a bustling pedestrian and cultural center.

I have dreams of travel. So far I have traveled to 3 different countries and each time my eyes and mind were opened wide.

I have plans to travel this summer and put a pause on school to travel into the fall. If all goes well I will also follow my mother to sunny Florida which will mostly likely be my new home base.

I often feel that my lack of motivation comes from my basic needs not being met (unsatisfied with living situation). Although I am safe, I am bored. It takes 20-30 mins to get to the city where I shop for food, meet women and attend events. This means time, money and energy spent just to get to a "dead city."

I have visited cities where a moments walk gets you to all of these. Along the way having opportunities to meet and mingle with people.

Travel, in my opinion, offers more for growth and learning than any classroom. My parents hound me all the time about my future plans. I tell them, "I do not know." I think even if I found my dream job, I would be so uncomfortable here that I would go mad.

My parents have scared me out of traveling once already. I had a make shift plan to visit a couple cities and stay with some family in Germany. They constantly cite the dangers of traveling and imply its foolishness, my foolishness.

For me, I believe the answers I seek are in exploration. The mind opening effect of traveling and the network of people I plan to meet is a world of more wealth to me than a degree in whatever I might pick for the sake of picking. I want to make something not work for someone.

I know there are many people who have done this before me and succeeded, most likely with many failures and risk along the way. This is something I am aware of. This is also something I feel such a burning for that while I keep sitting still in this environment I feel its heat. I can either be burned by it or use that passion as fuel which I have used in the past to great success.

So my issue here is a lack of support from friends, family and environment to do what I feel is in my best interest.

That is to experience the world, with all its risks and wonders, to open my mind and help figure out where best I shall live and what best I shall do.

I would like your thoughts on this because I feel you may be able to better clear up my thoughts coming from a similar desire of self growth and propose a better action plan than my parents, whose plan is to just pick something to study and then work up enough money to eventually to travel on holiday.

My plan is to live life by the horns to learn and experience while I am young and unrestricted by major responsibilities other than my own well being.

This plan needs work but that is where a support group may assist me.

This video partly helped me realize the importance of a support group.

-How to find and do work you love: Scott Dinsmore at TEDxGoldenGatePark (2D)- on youtube

P.s. Please feel free to lay on any criticism. I will more offended if you hold back!


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 07, 2014 11:06 pm 
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Do not let anyone discourage you from your dreams. I feel you. I have failed two years in med school due to several things, mostly my faults, among other things, and my parents don't quite like the idea that I'm still here, but I could care less. Even if one day they decide to stop supporting me, I will earn the money by myself and do whatever the fuck it takes, but I'm going to be a doctor.

Travelling is lots of fun and very beneficial to one's character. It can be quite frustrating that you feel like noone is supporting you, I can understand that. I think your friends and your parents mainly have problems with the "taking risk" part because they want you out of harm's way. I never listened to these kinds of advices. And yes indeed, I burned myself quite a bunch of times, but hey, I'm still here, fine and living, and in the long run the only results of these past "failures" are that I'm wiser, and stronger.

I suggest you find online communities that can be of your interest regarding your goals and travels, and make friends there. I highly doubt that you will still lack supporters. Be careful though because the internet is full of scams, so always double check before you spend your money on something organized by these communities.

I wish you good luck!

Peace,

In$tinct.

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Relationship guide: extended-relationship-guide-vt170687.html

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 08, 2014 1:28 am 
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Thanks for your thoughts In$tinct.

Its funny that you are in a position that my parents would fully support. Ironic and just goes to show its only a matter of their opinion vs our opinion.

I bet there are parents out there trying to get their kid to travel the world!

Yes, they just want me safe, maybe in a bubble wrapped room with knee pads. I guess that's a good parent, I must say I appreciate all they have done.

I would even argue this situation is forcing me to take matters into my own hands, you could say that its their final lesson for me whether they are conscious of that or not.

Yes, I am always hearing how important failure is full of lessons and is to crucial success! Obviously, the idea is to aim for success and get up/brush yourself off after failures.


So far I have tried the online thing but people you can spend face to face time with is much more potent.

About the money thing. There is almost always a free option!


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 08, 2014 3:59 am 
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Location: Hungary, Pécs
Yeah I agree with that face-to-face thing, but online is still better than nothing. By the way, don't get me wrong, my parents do support me, they just (understandably) don't like the fact that it takes me 8 years instead of 6 to achieve that. Which means a hell lot more money.

Anyway, I stand by my case. With, or without support, as a man it's your absolute duty to chase your dreams. If you start the journey and enjoy every moment of it, I could bet my life that there will be people willing to join you on the adventure.

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Relationship guide: extended-relationship-guide-vt170687.html

http://wayoftheplayer.com/become-a-player/instinct


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