Hi there guys I'm a bit of a newb to gaming and I need some help. I have developed a bit of one-itis and spent too long in comfort with this chick. She has flaked on me a couple of times but with genuine reasons ( important exam prep, new job) and we have logistic problems because of job time conflicts.

She has always taken my calls but sometimes ignores my texts. I asked her a text question yesterday how was her first day went at work but no reply. So I want to freeze out.


I want to continue freezing her but I am returning to my home country for 1.5 months in a weeks time. Should I freeze her out for the 1.5 months as well? I think it would give her a big shock but dosen't this make me look petty as well? The alternative is I call her before I go to say goodbye which of course is the temptation but I guess it will weaken me. I'm also tempted to scold her for not replying but I know this would kill it.

Also how can I come back post freeze? Seems weird just phoning up after I have not called to say goodbye when I plan to go away for 1.5 months. Unfortunately I can't just run into this girl by accident.

Any advice would be seriously appreciated. Thanks.

just send her a text before you go saying something like "hey, just letting everyone know that i'll be out of the country until XX, so you wont be able to get hold of me. cheers"
neutral and general. she didn't get special SPAM, she got the same text as everyone else.
then when you're back, wait a week or so and then phone her.

Make the text seem like a mass text message "Hey guys gonna be unreachable for about a month, talk to you when I get back." Don't send her some sappy personal text, shes just the same as everyone else in your phone. No special SPAM.

A general group text......perfecto. Thanks alot guys, great advice. Sometimes you can be too close to this shit and not see the wood from the trees.

I have learnt a couple of things from the experience with this girl.

Firstly, sometimes you just have to barrel through one-itis feelings and keep gaming other girls even when you don't feel like it for so many reasons: To retain your power, have other options, congruently imply competition etc. That is until at least you are in the exact position you want to be in with that special one.

I've take action on this. I'm hoping to get my game on with another girl that I should see tomorrow. Previously I think she gave me some IOIs.

Secondly, you can be too much of a perfectionist about pulling the trigger at the correct time and in the right place. In hindsight I had that girl in deep comfort and bottled it because of logistics.

I guess this is the great thing about freeze outs because if you didn't screw up too badly the first time you may get another go whilst rectifying your earlier mistakes.


Cheers.

Yes.

And 'being out of town' is the SINGLE BEST way to beat girls who play hard to get.

When you get a girl's number, when you ask her out (or call her up), she's either going to:


1. Ignore -- which means she's relatively disinterested, but she's a bit interested even to give your number so you have a chance.

2. Bullshit ("I'm busy tonight, maybe some other time") -- which means she's not totally disinterested but is playing games.

3. Say yes ("I'm busy tonight, how's thursday?") -- she wants you -- or at least your company.

If 1. my favorite response is to wait a couple of days, then say "Yo, I'm going out of town for a few days, so when you text me I won't get it for a few days. See you in a couple of weeks [or next week whatever]"... if she ignores that, she's off. Not worth the games. Usually she'll respond a bit later with "Cool, have fun. Maybe we can meet up blabla"... If she responds with a specific time, you're on. If she responds vaguely, say "Cool, I'll be back [e.g.] next friday. When are you free after that?" if she responds vaguely again, say "Cool, I'll be busy most of the week, but hit me up sometime, I'll sort out a time"... then she has to either give a specific time, or ignore. If she ignores, you're off. If not, you're on.

If 2. say "Yo, I'll be up in Philadelphia [or wherever] for most of next week. What time will you be free the week after? I'm pretty busy, but I should be able to sort something out."

If 3. you're on.