Ive noticed that everytime i begin talking to a girl, im about to flirt, tease, and communicate decently and have them fairly hooked BUT what i am not able to do is create deep/intellectual conversation to build trust/bonding.. im not sure why i have trouble with this, but if anyone has advice that would be awesome

Who told you that intellectual conversation builds trust and bonding?

really deep shit and talking about religion and politics is something you do after you've known this girl a bit. Third date kinda stuff. You should be more worried about having fun with her and keeping her hooked more than stimulating her brain.

Keep it super light until you've had sex. Topics of dating/relationships/celebrities/fashion. That kind of shit. You know, the stuff girls like to talk about. Have her do most of the talking.

Somewhat disagree with what the others said. Yes, on some level you should keep it light and entertaining, but you could still have a deep/intellectual conversation with someone to connect more strongly. An Ivy-League educated i-banker in NYC might enjoy you more than a Hooters-bimbo down in Tampa, Florida. So keeping it "light" can backfire.

Smart girls do like to be stimulated intellectually. But that assumes you are gaming a smart chick.

Having said that, you can do both - be light and fun - yet deep and intellectual with your conversation topic.

Here's a killer question that I love:

If you could go back in time and space and talk to yourself when you were 18 - but only for 15 minutes - what would you say?

It's a great question, because it's both fun and light, but her answer can open up doors to so many other great topics - her values, priorities in life, mistakes she made, her proudest moments, best and worst decisions. Now that stuff is superdeep.

And it's a sci-fi question. How awesome is that?!

Want a thousand more questions like this one? PM me, and I'll send you a link to my mobile app.

_________________
Andy

http://www.UltimateManMagazine.com

I like this.

I also agree that light and playful doesn't mean that you can't go pretty intellectual even within the confines of the topic of relationship dynamics for example.
Every woman - ESPECIALLY the brainiac dr./lawyer/etc. women who are almost never accessed in this way - yearn to be accessed at that soft vulnerable playful place they have inside them.
This.

i got too many PM's about the mobile app with conversation topics for first dates.

so let me post the link here, so you can download it for free in the apple app store on itunes:

https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/convers ... 63343?mt=8

the best two sections for first dates are FANTASY and CRIMES, because they are tons of fun questions similar to the one i posted earlier.

sorry, we don't have an android version of the app yet.

and sorry for the self promotion, but it's a free app to download.

_________________
Andy

http://www.UltimateManMagazine.com

you can stack with another opener (just use a differnt genre)

or ask an open ended question like "awesome, why do you like that?" or "why that way?"
"what made you do that?" deeper conversations involve purpose behind it

everyone's favorite subject is themselves so just have her keep talking about herself.

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The answer that comes to mind is multi-staged, so bear with me..

1. The most honest and uplifting answer is to form self interests outside of pickup, ANY interests! It relays value and also may be a way to meet more people, which is what it's all about. (Gym, yoga, pilates, take an art class, dance class, continue education (if appropriate for age), volunteer, spirituality, the list is endless)

2. Relay self worth in your stories without it ever being the POINT of your story. I encourage honesty but if you need to make a stretch to sell yourself, suit your means. And it goes without saying we don't brag right? So your story could be....

I took my nephew to a birthday party last week and jeez, I didn't know what I got myself into. It was crazy, the kids were scared to get in the Inflated Jumping ride, so I went in first and my nephew and his friends finally followed. It was so cute, most of them were dressed like power rangers and they got me to stay for a full five minutes.
t-r-a-n-s-I-t-i-o-n-.

(something like) So I crossed off cake and playtime this week! Your last party must have been more off the wall but I bet there were no power rangers!!

or

Today the sweetest old lady was lost looking for the B-line, but she was sooo far off! I wanted to get coffee anyways so I told her i'd walk her and she told me about growing up in the seventies and a very wild Janis Joplin concert they had in the same field 35 years ago. It was wild hearing her say what they used to do.

t-r-a-n-s-I-t-I-o-n.

(something like) But I can tell from your look you're hard to tame, you must have been to a wild [insert appropriate artist] Dave Matthews concert yourself before.


explanation: This form of conversation will avoid the akward tension that is built by the typical "interview" format of conversation. You are sharing experiences, much more like women conversate amongst themselves, and all the while displaying good qualities without attempting to. (point there that if I stopped story #1 at finally followed or #2 at i'd walk her, it would have the same effect as bragging and looking for validation in a response. It is essential to relay the good quality portion of story without missing a beat or pausing, that way it seems effortless and part of your persona as you work toward the logical conclusion or transition point in your conversation.)



I hope these examples were adequate, YOU MUST CALIBRATE YOUR STORIES TO YOUR PERSONA, however. Personally, I am a "bad boy" type so my stories relay more of the "apple pie" qualities that my self image may lack. If you are the nice guy, and you tell those stories... I can promise you an experience as a doormat.

Brainstorm, make it your own, and if you're still needing help message me. Best wishes

Gu$

Want to trade? Deep and intellectual is all I have. Not good to stimulate the mind when its the nads I want to stimulate

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