Failed to escalate. What do you think of this?



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PostPosted: Tue Nov 12, 2013 9:54 am 
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There is this HB in our group, quite cute. Known her for like 6 months. She is a good friend of my buddy and we often hang out although its male predominant group. I never tried to escalate her and just assumed for quite a while I am friendzoned, which i have no problem with tbh (tho i would totally have sex with her, but not much more :D ).

So, we are in club...like 7-8 guys, and 3 girls. I didn't talk much with her, there was a singer in a club so we mostly sang with him, but we def exchanged some looks and kino for which I was 80% sure she wants me to escalate. And here is my wonderful thought process:
- absolutely no idea what to say or how to verbally escalate
- she might be just drunk and flitry (we all had quite a bit of alcohol in our bloodstream)
- small club, we are all cramped at one place, it would be lame to make out in front of all my buddies
- she prob wont go outside since we all came here to listen to the singer
- we cannot leave group for the night because of some other logistics
- it would be awkward to be out with her again (and my buddies) if i misinterpreted her signs
- I am friendzoned...why is she doing this?
- I don't know what to say, I don't know what to say, I don't know what to say, I don't know what to say....


Opinions?


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 12, 2013 3:14 pm 
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I have to give you credit. My mind would probably warp if I started thinking of all those thing while being with a girl. Keep things simple.
Quote:
I don't know what to say, I don't know what to say, I don't know what to say, I don't know what to say....
Some nice hypnosis you got going on here! KNOCK THIS SHIT OFF! It's all about your mindset. There are a lot of great threads on this forum on the topic. Look around
Quote:
I never tried to escalate her and just assumed for quite a while I am friendzoned .... we def exchanged some looks and kino for which I was 80% sure she wants me to escalate.
Believe it or not, it's a good start. See how she acts around you the next time you meet (without liquor in your bloodstream). Get her number if you haven't done so already. Joke around with her. Light kino, then escalate.

One word of warning though: make sure you make your intentions clear. If you just want to be "friends with benefits," don't make her believe otherwise.

Al


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 13, 2013 7:32 pm 
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Do you realise how much your value just dropped from that post alone?

As the person above has said, you need to work on your mindset dude.

Let's get one thing straight first of all. Are you on this forum to pick up girls or to have girls pick you up?? Who cares whether or not she 'meant' for any escalation or not. It's your job to find a way to make it happen. If you do it the right way, you can gauge her attraction along the way and there's no reason to have an awkward moment where you go in for a kiss and she completely backs off.

Start off with light contact. Touch her arm or her belly when you're talking to her. Tickle her back up and down with your hand if the other guys are around, they won't notice, and if they do (or she does), just work your way out of it. It's so easy to get yourself out of it.

If you were watching a singer, you could have easily grabbed her hand and pulled her near you. If she responds well, keep escalating slightly. If she backs away, just make it seem you're showing her something.

Just build and build and build on positive kino. no need to jump straight in with something that will cause awkwardness. Even if she is interested in you, she is probably thinking the same things you are, so start of subtle. Don't wait for her lead or you will most likely never get it.

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PostPosted: Wed Nov 13, 2013 9:26 pm 
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Quote:
Do you realise how much your value just dropped from that post alone?
Yes I do. Every bit of it. Thank you for your input. :)


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