Alright so, to cut the long story short, I felt attracted towards this HB8 in college. We went together to a 3-day event, during which we had a lot of fun together. We'd basically talk all night in my room after the event, with loads of light touching.

She tells me all the girls from her year (she's a fresher, I'm in my 2nd year now) really like me and think I'm attractive, bla bla. But in the past 2-3 days, I feel like I've lost my end a little.

She was narrating this incident where a guy only 2 days back, asked her out and she told him "I don't want to get into a relationship right now". Now I can't possibly figure out why she'd tell me this unless she wanted to indirectly tell me the same.

+ She wants to be with me and talk to me ALL the time which gives me a hint that I might have entered her friend-zone, although I've done my bit when it comes to sexual flirting, etc.

Could you guys please tell me if I've lost her and should start looking elsewhere or if there's still some hope here?

_________________
Women are plenty, time is not.

Ok firstly your definately in her friend zone,and i think she is attracted to you.you said she said to that guy didnt want to get into a relationship now.Maybe she said that to him because she didnt feel close to him,and she was afraid she would hurt your feelings if she had said yes.Its good that she told you because it shows she trusts you.In my opinion there is two things you can do,the first is ignore her for a day or two and see if she makes the effort to text,call or talk to you in person,if she does you will know shes interested and maybe wants more,the second thing is you could just go for it but slowly,your in the friend zone so maybe get to know her a bit better,maybe ask her out on a date but dont make it sound too needy just have a normal conversation with her and say have you any plans for the weekend,and if she says no say oh would you like to do something and then take it from there.then at the end of the night maybe giver her a kiss but leave it at that then the next time ye meet up maybe do a bit more keep building the sexual tension up as you go along.i dont think you have lost her,you will know if youve lost her because she wont make the effort to talk or see you,or she will be making excuses.if you think your loosing her,dont be afraid if your out with her in a club dont be afraid talk to other women,see what your HB8 reaction is then you will know what to do from there,I hope this helps

Well i dont know what oslo said (tl;dr) but I think it's because she has you by the balls. ignore her texts, cut her off for a little, and let her find out for herself you're hanging out with someone hotter than her. In "push/pull" terms, all youve been doing is PULLING. you gotta PUSH her away a little. she'll be jealous as hell, your game will improve, and you'll have girls fighting over you.

had a 9 friend zone me, did that, and things changed a little heh heh ;D

It's not looking too good if you were in your room alone together and talked all night without anything happening - especially if it was 3 nights in a row.

I think the story about the guy asking her out could be one of two things; you were right and she wants to indirectly tell you she's not interested in being more than friends, OR there's a chance that she wants just wants you to know that she's available but doesn't want a relationship - meaning that she may be open for FWB. But it looks as if you're going to be stuck a friend without benefits unless you can redeem yourself by doing what EverythingGuy said and start pushing instead of pulling; often people don't realize they want something until they don't have it anymore. If she's scared to lose you or feels like you're drifting away she may very well start chasing you, and the tables will have turned.

Thanks Guys.

I do get your point.

Could you guys give me some more examples of how I should behave in this situation? In situations such as these, I find it really hard to think outside of the picture.

She does have me by my balls - to an extent. She has been trying to make me cut down on smoking, asking me again and again to see her in the evening, making me stay till late when I say I want to go back.

I've started saying "NO" and doing things as I wish to do. In fact, after a long round of texts in which she kept insisting I cut down on the my smokes, I went to the extent of saying "Look, I get your intentions but I can't have someone controlling me. There's a reason I don't want a relationship right now ".

But then, it's pretty confusing for me, if you get me. If you guys could give some more examples.

Arigato.

P.s: I do want this girl. And I'm totally okay with idea of "Pushing".

_________________
Women are plenty, time is not.

Im not so sure what Oslo said was correct. But she prolly told you that story about the " I dont want to be in a relationship" because she just wants a f-buddy. Think about it.

The more you leave it the worse its gonna get.

Send her a text.... Ask her to come over..... Tell her to wear something pretty..... Mess around neg her and flirt with her......... Then kiss her, simple as... Make it somewhat passionate and spontanious like you didnt plan on it.

If she rejects you leave it a while, chances are that has never happened to her before, shell want more.

Dont be played, be the player


Ps FROM NOW on any conversations she starts about guys must be adverted, change subject make it uncomfortable to talk about.

Good luck

FrostBitee

_________________
18
From Ireland

"If you dont approach, you wont close" ~FrostBitee

I see.

Well about the FWB thing -

I'm not sure if I want to add her to my list of FWBs, honestly. I don't know for what reasons. Even if she made a pass at me suggesting to become FWBs, I guess I'd ask her to save the pass To have FWBs inside the college campus (which mind you, is pretty small considering the number of people here), doesn't seem like a bright idea to me.

Update: I've been cutting off the attention supply to her. Sparingly replied to her texts today, said NO when she asked if we could come for a walk (friends are watching a movie I don't like, come for a walk? I'm getting bored) because that's the time when I hit the gym, etc.

How do I go further?

I think there was a period where I had her in my frame, attracted. I want to get that phase back.

_________________
Women are plenty, time is not.

Wait, so if you don't want FWB then do you want a relationship with her? Because it doesn't look like that's what she wants at all.

You're doing well to make yourself more scarce since she'll start to crave your attention. At the same time, you missed a good opportunity when she asked to go for a walk with you. I think you need to grab your balls and make a move on her - if she rejects you then who gives a fuck, just say that you misread the situation and still want to be friends (or not). You'll probably be nervous, scared even, but you need to just ignore that and be a man. Good luck

When a girl says she doesn't want a relationship, this sometimes means "I want sex and I'm not ready to get hitched".

Bang her silly and move on.

If you really want this girl in a relationship and she doesn't want one at the moment - FWB is actually a good idea.

It's been proven time and time again that if you repeatively have sex with someone, the brain will send out the same chemicals to your body that it does when you are in love with someone.

After you've fucked her the first time, just start treating her more or less like a gf. Don't start out with inviting her out to nice dinners and so on, but hang out with her, enjoy yourself, kino a lot and when the evening comes you fuck her again.. As far as I can tell you allreadt spend a lot of time with her, and the only way (atleast from what I've experienced) for a FWB relationship to work, you got to have time apart and meet exclusivley for sex.

Science is on your side, my friend.


Best of luck - The Dice

_________________
Alea iacta est - The die has been cast