Here's a few options that you can try..

1. "I don't know...do you? "

2. "No...not yet."

3. "No you don't...but wouldn't it be cool if you did though? "

4. "I don't think we've officially met or unofficially for that matter...but go ahead, take the initiative. "

5. "No, i don't think you do. I've come across your profile while browsing the groups here and something you said made me feel like messaging you."


(credits to hypnotic_mike)

Another slightly cocky answer would be..

"No you don't. But I'd like to change that."

I personally use this one..

"No, I don't think so. But, you seemed interesting. And I thought you would be open to meeting new people around here. Right?"

Basically, it's a compliment and a challenge. Is she friendly enough or not.

You can use any of the aforementioned or use the template to structure a reply in your own words.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Well, that question can only be answered by you.

Think of it through two tracks.

"What you did vs. What you could've done"

Make two columns. Write down the steps on both sides. The practical and the ideal.

Then, you objectively study your pick up till this point and see where you could've improved with her. Work on those areas.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

I suppose it is normal that you do not interact as much considering that the mind space is occupied by thoughts of the impending examinations.

That being said there is nothing wrong in having a short (~5 to 10 messages) text conversation/ (~10-15 minutes) phone conversation with her every day or alternate day just to keep the rapport flowing but be careful to not be too overbearing or drag out the conversation.

Exams are the top priority at the moment. Focus on them. And let her focus on hers too.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Firstly, there is nothing wrong in going by yourself. You can just shrug and tell her that your buddies are lazy bums and hence you came all by yourself. She won't hold that against you.

Secondly, the truth is that

"Her : so when are we hanging out did we decide that yet ?
Me : Not exactly , haha around when do you want to hang out ?
Her : I'm down for whenever your not busy"

This part of the conversation translates to her telling you to take the reins in your hand. Set a time, date and place and she would meet you. But, your inability to do that is somewhat disturbing. Be a man. Take charge. If she wants you to take the lead, don't hesitate. Take it.

Don't read too much into her not messaging you for one day. By the look of things, she seems interested. Message her, it won't cost you a dime.

"Needy" isn't about who goes first and all that, it's about your frame of mind. I can message a woman first and control the interaction, it's not needy, it's just that I wanted to talk. That's what you need to understand. There is no power loss on first texts and power gain if you are a texted first. Come out of your illusions.

Go to the game. Talk to her. Escalate hopefully to a stage where you can kiss her. Then, see where you can go from there.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Hey Don, I am once again in need of your golden advice. Last night I was at a party where I met one girl. We all slept at my friends house where I f-closed this one girl. After that she wouldn't let me go and made out like all night. In the morning before I left, I got her number, which she seemed hesitant about. The whole reason we hooked up was how much a like we were and she really liked me but said it is a one time thing but she is looking for a relationship and I am looking to do the same if it is with her. Any idea on what I should send for my first text? She lives very far from me so I believe most my conversation with her would be over the phone, so maybe I should call instead?

sorry for the long explanation and thanks in advance.

Don i really appreciate you taking the time to run this thread. your posts are always solid and insightful advice. It is truly helping me to under not just texting a girl but also communicating verbally as well.
Now on to my question. Met a girl at a bar the last night got her number and i k-closed her. thing is she kept her lips shut tight so i backed of quickly. Her two friends came moments later and pulled her away saying they were leaving. the also claimed they were lesbians when i asked them a question.
the next day i text her
me- hi
her- what up yo?
me- how did your lesbian experience go?
her- great i leveled up how'd your lesbian experience go?
me- fun i stole a kiss from you
her- u wanted a part in the lesbian experience? ;p
me- nope three lesbians sound too tiring but one i can handle
Her- but doesn't the fact i'm a lesbian disqualify you from handling me?
me- who said i was talking about you maybe its your friend i'm after...
her- well if were all lesbians it may be tough is all i'm saying.
me- i like a challenge. how about you?
Her- of course but fortunately being a girl is a lot easier than being a guy, we usually don't have to try as hard or be as initiative. it must be tough.
me- it is but you appreciate more the things you work hard for. and thanks for the insight you got some class and i like that

Now she stopped texting me for an hour so i decided to call her and try to setup a day 2 but she doesn't pick up and it goes to her voice mail. so i panic and say, "Hey ____ you stopped texting me this is unacceptable i want a divorce." and i hung up. So now i'm lying around feeling as if i have blown it and she texts me an hour later.

Her- actually its better to wait for the other person to initiate a divorce, cheaper that way =p

First time i texted a girl for over an hour in my life. Now i know that last text is a good sign. But i decided not to text back and just leave her hanging till tomorrow, because i just got sick of the emotional rollercoaster ride i was going through as i was texting.
Things i noticed though is that the conversation was very sexual and carried alot of tension when it started off. Then it devolved into lesbian chat. I wanted to get it away from that and bring it sexual again but i could figure out how. I also think i pulled a little too much and pushed too weakly. I didn't know how to push in this chat without offending her. Near the end it felt somewhat deeper chat and i was fine with it being there. Or am I just over analyzing the hell out of this?

im looking for just a general critique of my text chat. what i did good and what i did bad. How can i bring the conversation back to a sexual topic? and could i have pushed/pulled more effectively?
Don thanks again for this thread it is enormously informative.

Well, you could tell her that you are looking for the same thing as she is. And see how she takes that.

Just send her a normal text and add the "I really need to talk to you about something right now. It's a bit important." line at the end of the text.

Then, discuss the state of the relationship and where you can take it with her.

Calling is the preferable option over texting here. Call her.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Well, you need to realize something. When you choose a girl, you stick to her. This was where you could've chipped in and said, "Sweetheart, you know I'm a total lesbian for you. Can't blame me. You're pretty desirable. "

Moving on, Wrong. This was a shit test. You needed to address it head on with a, "Well, you are certainly anything but a simple woman. I'd like to take my chances." or something along those lines.

Direct. To the point. Even specifying your intent. Women respond well to such things.

Disqualifying yourself at that point was not the right move.

Well, you did insert the "challenge" part later on in the conversation, but it didn't have the same effect and she changed it to a topic after which the conversation died.

Seems to me, that she is losing interest quickly. I suggest you start flirting with a greater sexual vibe than you are. Stop with the lesbian stuff, start talking about situations, actions involving her and you.. describe things, send hints, use sexual innuendos.. all that will help you.

And another thing, if you don't like what's being said, change the conversation. Golden rule of communication.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Don, It looks as if your a master and text game so i would appreciate it if you gave a critique and some advice:

Got a girl's number Thursday ( Should of got laid as she basically asked me to go home with her... "Your so cute, i want to take you home" then kept holding my hand) I was being a pussy AFC About it.

So we exchange Numbers.

I text her the next day:

Me: Is my microwave meal done yet?.... Im getting Hungry. ( She did a air microwave dance, we joked about it on the night)

Her: (2-3 hours later) Haha!! not quite i'd say give it a few more minutes before it's done!!

I didn't respond that day, i didn't think there was need to. The next Day:

Me: I am luring girls to my house with sweets, which do you prefer? Skittles or M&M's ??

Her: oohh man, I'm more of a "Twiglets" kind of girl

Me: Twiglets!?! Aren't they crisps ******?..... As much as it hurts to say i don't think we can be dancing partners anymore!

Her: Indeed they are! :L .. That's why i sai it!! Oohhhh really?.....

Me: (I originally think i fucked up here but in retrospect i think the twiglet was a little shit test/ Challenge, and i failed.....) Do you not like sweets?!? Good job i didn't pull out the skittles Thursday night then!!

She hasn't replied. About 4 hours now ( i'm not needy, and i understand some girls just don't respond i just wanted to ask you this while it's fresh in my mind)


I think i messed up with the Twiglet thing, then with the last text, it just sounds like a weirdo would send.... :L

How should i proceed if she doesn't respond? Just drop her??

Cheers Don.

Setting, coffee shop, late only me and my 2 buddies on a table and a girl on a remote corner, everyone else has left.
I go up to her, opened her, sat down, got a few IOIs, she started qualifing herself then
Me: hey we should go bowling on thursday, what's ur phone number.
HB: so and so, not that (she made sure I got it right)
Me: I will call so, freespirit (she told me that she is). I will call you so that you would have mine
HB: text me so that I would know who is it
Me: Ok, I will, have to go join the guys now

After she left, I messaged her
Me: Hey, freespirit. That's the veterinarian.
her: you're still there ?
Me: Well, I left shortly after you did. It's not as much fun there without your radiant smile
her: Lol. Awe

Next day @ night
Messaged her: I just got out of a Salsa dance, that was fun. We should definitely go there some time.
She never answered back. Where did I go wrong ?

AW man, i feel like such a fool for making this post already..



In summary, I met a girl at a party, she shows every ounce of interest in me.

Then when it comes to texting, she uses a lot of "hahaha's lols and "thats funny's" yet doesn't truly carry the conversation. When I pretend Im going to leave, she tells me to stay and talk to her.

yet she replies every 30 minutes / 1 hour with one worded "lols" and "hahahas"

??? I dont text her for a few days then she wil text me to start a conversation, in which I will reply, and in which she will simply just go "hahaha" or "lols"

So there is this girl I´ve been seeing the last two weeks and we have very good connection. We wen´t to seperate parties last night (new years eve). At my party I made out with two girls and then fucked someone the girl I´m dating know.

I´m not sure how much she knows, but I don´t believe I did anything wrong so I won´t apologize.

Here´s our chat from today, day after newyears eve:

me: "can we meet tomorrow?

hey Don I have been after this girl for basically the whole year. on christmas eve we went out clubbing I left her for my mates and when I got back to her she was drunk and getting chatted up by 2 guys so this made me mad we had an arguement the next day and never talked all week then she text me this on new years eve.
"have a safe journey to edinburgh Dirty and have fun XXXX"
now what does that even mean?! does she want to give us another chance? is she just being freindly?
I just dont know how to read it
thanks for your help

_________________
I think that every successful man should have 3 women at his funeral. One that's crying, one that's smiling and one that's buying things on her laptop with his will.

I always have the problem of a girl that stops talking randomly. example:

Me:
Did you do much for new years then?

Girl:
Umm I had a party and sleepover last night :3

Me:
I did the same had like 15 people over at my house

Girl:
Awesome
You get smashed? Haha

Me:
Yea, got my first hangover too haha, great night what bout you?


conversation ended there, she didnt reply, this is the second time that shes done this and it confuses me. i mean why ask a question and then not bother replying to the answer?

By the way this is messaging over an internet dating site, basically what happend after that was that she went offline.

EDIT: she did reply later on, an hour and a half later on, another question is seeing as she takes so long to reply, am i wrong to reply to her instantly? as in should i wait a little while before replying?

Sup Don,

Glad to see you're back in your usual groove.So I've gotten a lot further along since I last posted in this thread. Getting solid numbers, solid interactions with people. I have two texting situations going on that I'd like you to weigh in on.

Just recently went to a party, didn't know many people, and really had a good time. Despite an awful guy/girl ratio (probably 4 available girls for 25 guys), I enjoyed myself, vibed with each girl individually, and got along very well with two of them. Unfortunately the more attractive had a boyfriend, but I was direct and honest with the other and asked her on a date the next day over facebook. I texted her the next couple days, sometimes with long breaks but fairly constant. We went, two days later, and had lunch. Took her to a nearby river after, we kissed. Now I know I'm set up well, but some weird feeling is keeping me from texting her. We got along, but I got some uncomfortable vibes. I know that its best to maintain contact, so I think I'll go with "Happy New Year!! How late can I be and still say that?"

Met a girl at another party, we got along very well. I had high social status among the people there, I was very direct with her. Where she was nervously chatting, I remained calm and we got along great. As soon as she accepted my friend request on facebook I told her that she was cute and I wanted to see her again. She has a boyfriend. I could see this going somewhere, so I don't mind breaking them up, but it adds complexity. After some joking, flirty talk, she accepted an invitation to lunch on Jan 1. After expressly saying it was a date, I got her to agree by telling her she was in my "friend zone," a great line I saw somewhere on this site. Unfortunately, I opted for the "cool" trick of telling her to track my number down. It was a bad decision, as she didn't answer another facebook message intended to start a conversation a day or two later. Today, the first, I sent her a message as early as I could telling her lunch at 1 pm, and not to make excuses with my phone number on it. She texted me: "Hey [Slip], it's Grace, I swear I jut got your message, and it turns out I'm doing family stuff today, I'm really sorry, but we can do something some other time "

I reply: "Rude. Plan it and let me know."
Then "Okay I will "

So... what? Just wait and see? Or after a certain amount of time enquire about the date of our engagement?