Hey guys, completely new to PUA stuff. I read a lot about it, but haven't put much to the test. Anyways, met this girl from class (we're in college), got her number (going by M3, I only got to A2 during the first convo with her and her friend...) Texted her Monday (and as you will see, it's super dragged out):

Me [01:52]: Whoa HB, I just saw someone that looked exactly like you! There's a little problem though..
HB [03:18]: Haha what's the problem?
Me [03:47]: She was wearing this velvety fuzzy Santa hat, which looked cute, but you wouldn't believe what's written on it!
HB [05:59]: I've never seen a santa hat with stuff written on it
Me [08:41]: It read "Naughtiest [heart]" in pink on the white rim of the hat. I couldn't believe it was you because she also had these really obnoxious knee-high boots on, strutting down the street. Any side jobs you want to tell me about? ;p
HB [09:07]: Come to think of it...that's exactly what I was doing today, its not like there are exams or anything
Me [09:33]: Oh ya I did study a little after I came back from my jog as well. Love running in this weather, you're body gets all hot on the inside but the air keeps your skin cool and tingly. Anyways, gotta attend this event at dorm. Catch ya later!
= No response, expected =

Exchange 1: (so far so good)
Exchange 2: (She sounded more annoyed/distant. I know she has an exam the next morning, so I had a dilemma; either I continue with it, or I continue it the next day, which would've dragged it out for even longer and made the punchline a colder text than it already is)
Exchange 3: (Now, if she didn't add the sarcasm at the end about exams, I would've continued the thread and it would've made a good callback for later. But the last part of her message sounded like she was completely annoyed so I stacked and stopped)

I made up this routine based on one of Vin Dicarlo's examples in his books.
The purpose was to:
Create conversation from a weak first-meet
Create sexual tension (with intrigue at first, then charged vocab at the end)
Create a good callback

So yea, I'd say it didn't go even close the way I wanted it to.
What were some things that I could've done differently to produce a better result with this routine?
Was it just because her exam frame overpowered my text's frame?
Or is it just a bad routine in general?
Should I take out the middle text? I feel that she got annoyed by me trying to create too much intrigue (but at the same time, dragged it out), and lost her interest.

Well, to be honest I find it a bit strange that you feel emasculated by her job and her independence. I mean, that should be an even greater factor in your will to turn on the "Sexuality" switch. She's open, she's mature and she's free.. ergo she'll appreciate you not beating around the bush with your feelings, yes.. even the sexual stuff.

You're worrying about something which isn't really an issue at all. Do not hesitate to get sexual with a girl. It shows your confidence level to her. Do you think Robbie Williams hesitates? No, he really does not. Youtube it, if you don't believe it.

As for escalation and getting physical, that can be done everywhere, I'd suggest you get a copy of "DiCarlo Escalation Ladder". Google it and download that pdf. That should help you in this regard and is future pick-ups.

Regards,

Luke

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Well, I have found that going direct works best. Maybe, 'cause I am a lazy guy. But, as a man I should take the lead in the interaction. If you are thinking of inviting a girl out to drinks, you give her a time, you give her a place, so that it is something tangible to look forward to.

Saying "Let's meet up for drinks" is a general statement which just gives out an intent. In her mind, the "Where?" is already implied. You need to tell her exactly when and where.

Make the plan, be a man.

Women won't often say it out loud, but they actually find the men who take the reins in their hand as very attractive. So, next time remember to TELL her more than you ASK her. She'll appreciate it. Trust me.

Hope I have answered your query to your satisfaction.

Regards,

Luke

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Are you kidding me?

Dude, I am good with women, but I'm NOT a psychic. I don't know what a 16 year old is thinking in her head, from my position on the globe.

Anyway, why don't you ask of her what you want. Tell her something like..

"I could never figure out what you wanted me to do with this wish. But, for the longest time I've wished that.. (insert your wish)"

or something along those lines.

You don't have to be a know-it-all to get some romance started with a woman. And that line shows that you did indeed put some effort in to think of what she'd want, but you didn't get far with it. But, at the same time you're telling her a wish that you've wanted from her for a long time, so you better make it something good to read. I don't care what, just don't say "I want a pack of Pokemon cards" or something. Think about what you want and word it well, and she'll appreciate it.

Regards,

Luke

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Actually, it all came down to this one sweet, sweet word that you ignored..

CALIBRATION

cal·i·brate (kl-brt)

tr.v. cal·i·brat·ed, cal·i·brat·ing, cal·i·brates

To check, adjust, or determine by comparison with a standard

If you'd have understood by the reference points which you'd gather by being around women (and seems to me that you haven't been around many, yet) you should realize that the interaction is never the way you've thought it is going to be. Planning the execution of a routine beforehand is a bad move. Unless you have the capability to improvise on it based on the variables in a situation, never go for canned routines and lines. They often backfire.

Now, to the whole "text frame" vs "exam frame" debate. Firstly, the initial conversation is cute, but I don't see an major signs which might tell me that she's as interested in you ,as you are in her. You wrote quite an well thought out, descriptive final text and she didn't even reply. Not a good sign. I mean how hard is it to just say "Bye"? The fact that she couldn't be bothered to type three little letters doesn't bode well.

Also, if it's a person's exams the following day, there are gonna be completely occupied with those thoughts. Trying to get a sexual conversation started in examinations time, is rarely successful. Of course, she's gonna be sarcastic about exams, she's in no mood to have sexual tension coupled with the examination tension, dude.

So, my advice to you is to get as many reference points as you can. Go out, meet more women, get their numbers, text them and observe their replies to your replies and co-relate them with their moods. You will see a marked improvement in your game.

Regards,

Luke

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Fair points. I assume that what you said can be summarized with:
-lack of experience in reading women's attraction/comfort level with me, thus miscalibrated.

So judging from this exchange alone, was it even suitable to text open? Or should I have built more attraction in-person first? It's really a catch-22, because I don't have class with her anymore, that's why I had to give it a shot even during exam time, in attempt to build some rapport before asking her on a study date.

Thanks for your insight.

Ok so I am progressing with this blonde (I posted our conversation few days back in this thread) by texting back and forth and now I want to set up a date.

I am maintaining cocky/funny/direct frame.

.....
Me: blabla. Look I would like to see you again. I know you want to see me too I wanted to go playing pool today. Wanna join me?

She (25 minutes): I am sorry I can't make it today. But I am free at saturday And... I am super no talented for such games, so I would postpone pool until we get to know each other better

Now this SMS of hers seems positive because she is offering alternative time.
But.
Yes I am translating our convo into english but she really used this weird implication: "we should know each other until we play pool" And to be honest I dont see the connection. Maybe she was just not thinking while writing this.

How do I proceed? I don't want to look so that I am gonna twist my plans just for her to meet up for some stupid coffee (ok I like to drink coffee but I just feel it would be too much pressure for me to just sit and talk to her as she is so gorgeous and this will be my first date after long long time)

Now I am thinking I will write something like this:

1) Ok lets make compromise. I will make some time on saturday and you r gonna play the pool. I like the game and I wan't to see how you can handle the stick . I won't laugh I promise it will be just 2 of us anyway!

or

2) Ok lets make compromise. I will make some time on saturday and you r gonna play the pool. Don't worry I will not laugh to you and I am good teacher at things that are fun

My logic is that she should also take part of it. When I just say "ok let's grab cup of coffee" or "ok let's go see christmas fair" (which is activity I really don't want to) I will be basically setting the frame that shows I am willing to do anything just to meet up with her.

By saying 1) I am setting her up to prove herself to me "how can she handle". By saying 2) I am setting the frame that she doesn't have to worry that it will just be fun and I will take care of her.

The problem is that this plan of mine relies on the unspoken assumption that she just don't want to look silly playing the game with me. Is there any other possible reason she doesn't want to go with me and therefore it doesn't make sense to say 1 or 2?

So back around thanksgiving i f-close this hb 9. get her number and we have a few texts back and forth after that but dont get together again and then I leave, I'm from out of town.

I get back in town. I don't call or text her or anything but then I see her out. I quickly pull her off of 2 others guys that are hitting on her hard and the whole night is eye contact and lots of touching between us.

Later I push for logistics to get back to her place and she says she can't because of her monthly thing but if I want I can still come back to her place but that she is just gonna pass out, and she also has to work at 9 am.

We go outside to smoke and make out in private out there and basically talk about how we are gonna fuck soon and she says 'call me or texting me or whatever, i'll be waiting by my phone, blah blah".

so the question is any ideas for a general text to send her. I want it to be a text that doesn't require a response. just basically says that it was nice running into her, i had fun, and just some playful banter, maybe some innuendo. throw in something about how i hope she survived work early the next morning. blah blah, etc.

How much is to much is saying I enjoyed it? I wanna play it cool but basically show interest to the extent I can. not even necessarily looking to set anything up yet, unless she responds and its looking promise, just thought it was good to make a little general contact.

any suggestions. is this the right way to move forward?

So I really don't have a text game so I thought what better way to improve then to try it. So I start texting some girls in my phone and one I am really attracted to. We had a little history in high school but never went past kissing. Well I briefly texted about work, her job, and that kinda shit. Than asked if she had plans because it was her last night off before she had to work a few days straight. She says no. Then randomly I did this.

Me: Lets get dinner
Her: Tonight?..
Me:Sure its ur last free night for the weel...might as well do something
Her: Yeahh lol. Where do you want to go?..
Me: Beef o Bradys by your house. Could go for some wings
Me:That cool with you?
Her: Ohh yeahh lol.
Me: You being sarcastic or u down to eat there lol
Her: It doesnt matter to me. Or we can go chill at Jess house and smoke lol (Jess being her best friend that I f-closed a few weeks ago)
Me: Im for dinner cuz I was tryna chill with you but if you'd rather fo smoke its cool
Her: Ohh ok. I didn't know that.
Me: lol now you do is that ok?
Her: Yeahh lol.
Me: So you wanna meet at my house
(45 min later)
Me: I just got home..you still wanna go out or you just wanna chill n smoke?..it dont matter to me
(3 1/2 hours later)
Her: Hey sorry I didnt text you back. Im really tired.

I never texted her back but I really wanna take this girl out! Did I kill it or what? By reading that convo you can tell my text game sucks but im here to improve. What should I do?

_________________
New to the game, eager to learn.

Well, it's no problem to 'text open' a girl, as you say. But, at the same time you need to realize that the amount of attraction and escalation that can be done in person, is far, far greater than that which can be built over texts. Hence, we always say that a physical meeting is the best opportunity.

Now, you need to be able to find ways ,without making obvious, of seeing her. Sure, you guys don't have class anymore. But, you do have her number. Keep talking, build comfort, establish rapport and ask her out. It's that simple, really.

Regards,

Luke

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Well, there could be two ways to look at this..

The first is holding your idea, and going with the second message, 'cause that seems better put and in consideration of her unease and inexperience at an activity she is no good at.

The second, is to switch this activity to another which she feels more comfortable with, and meet up with her in her comfort zone in Saturday. That will work better cause she will appreciate the fact that you changed the plans to make her comfortable. While you'll get her in a much more relaxed and open state. Personally, this is what I'd go with.

Taking the lead isn't wrong, but you need to have enough comfort and trust with the girl so that she's absolutely open to following your lead anywhere.

Hope, I answered your question to your satisfaction.

Regards,

Luke

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Well, I am a bit surprised to be honest, you've already done the hard part of the deal by getting her to the degree that she's saying that she'll be "waiting by her phone" for your messages. It's not a far-fetched assumption that she is very, very open to physical intimacy with you. Now, you just need to keep doing what you're doing.

Send her a text of something along the lines of..

"You've been on my mind all day. I enjoyed last night..." or such.

Tells her that she wasn't alone in being as attracted and that you are practically matching her attraction.

People confuse the whole James Bond seduction when they think he's "calm, cool and closed-off" actually you couldn't be more wrong, with women he's "direct, open and brutally honest", that's the frame you need to get in your head. Also, you should've gone back to her place, got her hot and heavy and just come the day after to close the deal, as to say. Setting up a temperature and a tangible expectation you can fulfill the next day is a very important thing in such situations.

Anyway, you seem to have it under control and there isn't any 'fire-fighting' to do. Just be open, be direct and be honest in your words. She'll be all over you. And set up logistics. Don't delay this, opportunities don't always keep knockin' on the door.

Regards,

LUke

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

It's not a problem. Don't be so hard on yourself, son.

Yes, you obviously have an issue with "expressing interest the right way", but not texting. Now, see you did quite well in asking her out for dinner and she agreed. But then, does dinner mean "wings"? No, Sir. It doesn't.

When you ask a girl out to dinner, it sets a certain standard of a nice meal in a decent place. I am not saying go top a high-end luxury restaurant or something. But, a nice, quiet place which serves good food should've sufficed. And actually, all you needed to do was to give her the name of a somewhat acceptable place and she'd be open completely. Now, see what happened when you "wing"-ed the situation..

She become sarcastic.

She gave an excuse to go elsewhere.

You confessed your intent in the completely wrong way.

You said you were fine with her smoking at a friend's place too.

You asked her to meet you at your place.

She flaked.

End of story.

Basically, this needs an entire overhaul.

From the whole dinner worth dining about, to never backing down on your plan. to expressing your intent properly and to picking her up at her place. Those were the logical steps to the right outcome.

It's not all lost. But, she'll definitely be more wary of your suggestions from now on.

You can try. But, I'd just tell you to find a new girl to not repeat the mistakes with.

Regards,

Luke

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybthPsE4ld0[/youtube]

It's good to be back.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Can I have a small question about this? There are 2 spots:

1) the wings thing
2) he: "I wanna chill out with you" her: "lol I didnt know that" he: "is it ok with you???" her "lol"

You are implicating that she flaked partly b/c of (1) could you please explain why?

I mean for me it looks like she flaked because of (2) mainly and (1) is not a big deal. If she really has problem with (1) then she assumes she is going out for a date and she wouldn't "lol" at his expressed interest.