assistance needed!! , stuck a weird friend zone



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PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 1:21 am 
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Yep, im starting to get the same vibe, but I can imagine why.. now we see as saturday approaches. Shes been a bloody tough nut to crack. I hope she doesn't turn psychotic.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 7:10 am 
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This is crazy how similar of a situation im in with you. I have also hooked up with this girl a few times but when ive tried to go for sex it wont work. We were both drunk one night and I finger banged but thats as far as shed let me get. we've made out several times and she sleeps over from time to time and I KNOW she's interested just for some reason wont let me. Im currently trying this freeze technique your talking about and its actually going pretty good. Shes texting me the last 2 days asking to hangout and she actually JUST called me wanting to for a 3rd time lol. Goodluck with this girl and keep the updates coming. If you get with her ill just copy what you did lol


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 7:38 am 
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One thing I actually just remembered/noticed that these 2 girls have in common is that they seem like they like a challenge. I noticed your girl when you pulled away she became more needy and forward. Implying sex, asking to hangout, lots of texts. But it looks like when you finally came back in the end there she started to pull away. Its like she loves the challenge and as soon as your forward she backs off.

This is the same with this girl. The one time I actually did get the furthest was after watching a seminar video Gambler had put up. He said that if your stuck in the friend zone to treat her like a friend. Talk to other girls in front of her, hug her like a friend, this kind of thing. I did this with her for a little while showing very little sexual interest and after awhile one night she slept over and thats when I got the furthest. She actually said "Fuck me" at one point lol then stopped herself saying we should just be friends. Anyway hope this helps a bit :)


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 8:51 am 
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Ive read a lot of text game posts her sending you 3 messages per your 1 is a definite ioi however ever time you do it you give her power


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 10:25 am 
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Hey,

Im sorry to hear about your situation, mine is a tad worse because she has refused to kiss me thus far.. Anyway ill try my best to gather her on sat.

Remember its a bit hard not to answer texts as she goes into whats wrong with you, speak to me, calling me mode. It would kill her if i just dropped dead and to be honest scare her away.

So its her house this weekend.. She knows I'm going to try.. and maybe she simply needs to be in her comfort zone considering she hasn't been with the nicest of guys before i threaded along.

Also you should try freezing her, freezing is a tad hard on this one because she goes into "whats wrong mode" in 5 minutes.


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 03, 2012 9:51 pm 
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I don't know how well this will work for your situation but in my experience, I've been friend zoned multiple times and the only times that it has ever become more than that was a complete freeze out. Like stop speaking to her for a month to 2 months. Then gradually start speaking to her again and start it off flirty but not desperate. Let her remember how much fun she had with you and make her want you. Don't ask her on dates, just let her do all the work and if she's as into you as it sounds, she'll have no problem making the moves to see you. Like I said, not sure it will be worth it to try, it's quite a commitment, but i figured I'd make a suggestion. Good luck!

-Ghazal


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 03, 2012 10:32 pm 
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Quote:
Hey,

Im sorry to hear about your situation, mine is a tad worse because she has refused to kiss me thus far.. Anyway ill try my best to gather her on sat.

Remember its a bit hard not to answer texts as she goes into whats wrong with you, speak to me, calling me mode. It would kill her if i just dropped dead and to be honest scare her away.

So its her house this weekend.. She knows I'm going to try.. and maybe she simply needs to be in her comfort zone considering she hasn't been with the nicest of guys before i threaded along.

Also you should try freezing her, freezing is a tad hard on this one because she goes into "whats wrong mode" in 5 minutes.

why the fuck are you thinking about her?
open your eyes! your time has value too man!
wtf do you care if she will "worry"? you need to know what's going on,and act accordingly...i think she needs a man,SO BE A MAN and go direct on her ASS!

exemple:
listen,we have been playing this game too long,i need you to be an adult,and tell me what you wanna do?i dont like those games,they have no meaning..so think about it,and tell me..!

that's what you should say,that'll fix your problems.

tell me how it goes...

_________________
"Hank Moody: I love women, I have all of their albums."

"Vi Veri Veniversum Vivus Vici."

Read This One:
is-too-much-trust-bad-ie-she-thinks-ill-vt123851.html


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:19 pm 
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Hi,

Thanks for the advice, on friday she mentioned again how good i am to my friends, and treat them well, example her. I replied in the following manner ( as now ive grown tired of this crap).

"friends hmmm i've never tried to bed my friends before. You might be misinterpreting my good nature"

she messaged back asking "what are you saying" i knew it was over at that point, I instantly froze her out. The next day she asked me for my bank account to transfer the money she owed me. And i told her that ill give it to her and to cancel plans for her house that evening.

She just responded "i understand"

So i know im out of the game. The problem was i listened to her problems and gave her advice cuz she was in a tough time... so maybe that killed it. Anyway shes completely frozen out now. I havent heard from her all day, which is surprising..


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:38 pm 
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Also i was thinking of sending her one last message, because now I fear that she might think i wanted just the sex due to that savage sexually oriented message. so I was thinking of sending the final message. It might sound lame

" Before I disappear out of your life... I want you to understand that my advice was genuine, and my friendship was also genuine, but as i said once i started seeing you actually took an interest in someone else besides yourself (*i had told her i thought she was selfish) as in me.. things changed and I thought you were heading in the same direction.I obviously can never be just friends with you, just as you are not interested in more, you need to respect that im not interested in less. next sat was not a play at bedding you but it was supposed to be a date that would have changed your understanding of dating!!! i will never reveal what the plan was. Anyway im off, i really hope you stay strong and have a good future"

I know ill see this girl around a lot... and i dont want her to think i helped her out just to fuck her.... it sounds bad. What do you guys think... last message? i know this is completley the wrong approach but i need someone to kick me to wake up.


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 05, 2012 5:51 pm 
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Although I understand where you're coming from with the last message, it may just show how you secretly don't want to let her go. I feel like if you freeze her out completely right now, she'll realize that you really don't need her and she'll miss your company and having someone to talk to and hang out with. for the next month or two, you shoudn't message her or answer to her texts or anything. If you see her around, you can say hi but dont stop to talk or anything, just pretend you have somewhere to be. You can't be halfway sure in a freeze out, its either all in or it wont work. Keep updating your situation though, I'm curious to see how it all works out.

-Ghazal


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 05, 2012 6:15 pm 
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im trying to freeze her out, and for the last 2 days i heard nothing from her. So im going to keep it going for as long as possible. the only thing that worries me is that from my message she might have thought i just wanted to sleep with her... Which is the only thing that makes me worried... and if she thinks that, then she is going to end up hating me.

ehhh she was a decent catch shame it appears i have to throw her in the sea.


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 05, 2012 10:03 pm 
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Yet another update:

She has posted on her wall a song by the beetles "all you need is love"... now i normally wouldnt take notice... but she next to never posts anything on her wall... and the fact that she posted this song... is a bit strange...


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2012 4:40 am 
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It could definitely be a cry for attention. Just stand your ground and keep with the freeze out. You need to reset her view of you as a friend, and the only way to do that is to leave her alone for awhile.

-Ghazal


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2012 1:59 pm 
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Im trying to keep the freeze out however, she smsed about some cash she owed, and a top that she had of mine from when she slept over.

So i need to give her my acc number and grab the jacket.. but she is really trying to restart the friend ship.. SHame is that i a costum party this weekend and I was going to try and play the whole romantic surprise game.. so i bought her a costume, and was going to tell her to wear it,, obviously giving her anough hours to buy anything extra she might need.. She was really excited but now, it seems like I might go alone..

I have another HB in mind, to take and i allready asked her but she said she had no costume... so i was thinking of giving her the one i got for HB1... and going with her...Altoough i think this might complicate things as there friends...

How long do you guys recommend this freeze out?


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 06, 2012 3:29 pm 
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Quote:
How long do you guys recommend this freeze out?
FOR EVER!, she'll comeback ... they all do :wink:


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