Hey guys , I'd love to here how you would handle this. I play on a men's baseball team and we always go out for drinks after games on 2 nights a week. All summer this year there has been this absolute 10 working the bar and this passed tues i discovered her and her long term be had recently broken up. Throughout the summer when I had gone for drinks while she had been working (maybe 5 times) I had just been nice and funny with small flirting going on but nothing crazy. This passed Tuesday, she decided to have drinks with me and 3 buddies. We went out to another bar after then back to a buddies house. We went in the hot tub and she was clearly all over me, sitting on my lap etc and making it clear she was comfortable around me. I ended up sleeping with her that night at that house, no sex but kissing massaging cuddling etc. I number close in the morning and text a bit during the day. So now Thursday comes and I go out with the team for drinks while she's working. She decides to come out after back to my buddies. At the bar that night I had been small talking with her and just playing it cool..not being aggressive or clingy like about 5 others guy were. My theory was, we already had a good connection and I know she gets hit on all the time so I wanted to show that I have confidence to not be creepy like all the other guys. So she comes out after and I end up banging her at my buddies. Drive her home the next day on an all-time high that I just notched the hottest girl in my career. Now last night we had planned to maybe meet up after work but I wasn't feeling up for it. She said some of her hfs had shown up to the bar and I told her "ok I'm feeling tired anyways, we can get together another time" and she was okay with that. Now my question is, what should I be sending her today? I obviously know there is a chance she could have hooked up with another guy but I know that's out of my control and if that's the case, so be it. But I don't want her to think I'm clingy because that's a turn off so how should I ask her how her night was and set up a more intimate date together. Should I just politely say something like "hey how was your night?" Because that is so boring and I want to be more original and funny and set up a date with just the two of us this time. What kind of messages should I be sending and how often now should I be messaging? She messaged me first yesterday saying good
Morning etc so I feel she is interested I just want to hear some opinions on how I should keep pursuing her. Thanks for reading guys, hope to hear some advice. Cheers

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Stop sweating it man. Just send her the 'How was your night?' text.

This isn't mid game. This is a needy oneitus alienation thing... You don't ACTUALLY need to text her bro. If she wants rounds 2, she will text you. Stay optimistic. You are also feeling insecure that she might be banging guys from her bar every single second you're not in her presence.

However, we wasn't there, we don't know the vibe you both had with each other, what does your gut feeling say?

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You're overthinking.

And for the love of god you could of made that a lot easier to read.

With this attitude I would just suggest you let her reopen. Give it a day or two. Guys are usually dying to get back in contact with these types if she is what you say she is. Let her open. You got the lay, the connections in place, so now you can let her do the catching up.

Check out this aswell: viewtopic.php?f=25&t=190620

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I agree fellas, sorry for the long message lol I know I'm overthinking and believe that she definitely will be more interested if I just let her do her thing and not be needy to text her. You guys have no idea how hot she is though! Also, the other mildly concerning me is her recent break up. I'm wondering if I'm just a rebound or not. If I am that's fine but I want to pursue her further and show to her I'm a great guy she can be around. I try to tell my buddies all the time that women don't like being drowned by a bunch of texts that don't mean anything. They probably have about 20 guys regularly messaging them trying to hook up so you don't want to look like one of them.

We understand. You could be the rebound guy. But that is all down on her. Don't attach any outcome to it, this is going to sound negative, but assume it won't last with you. That way you won't get needy or hurt. Why worry about shit that you can't control?

The second you worry about shit that you can't control is when it manifests and becomes a self fulfilling prophecy

So, don't think about buying chocolates and flowers. Just be your regular cool self and 'see what happens'. It's just a girl.

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100% agree..I've been finding that almost the less you care about the outcome on women then more success you have. I don't mean being an asshole to them or anything, but showing that you are confident and almost showing her that you don't need her in your life makes women feel some more sort of attraction. That was my gameplan with her on Thursday while I could see about 5 different occasions where guys were trying to hit on her and she wasn't interested at all. I guess my problem is I'm putting her on a pedestal because of her looks and that can't happen. I'm confident I can pursue it further it's just one of those things where it almost seems too good to be true.