There's a girl i've kind of known for a few months through my sporting club but never really spoke to her much up until a couple weeks ago when she realised that a guy who had been trying to get with her was a friend of mine from my course. She started telling me about how he freaks her out a little bit because he is insanely obsessed with texting her (one night he had a 20:1 ratio with her which is just... wow). He is a nice guy, i just don't know what's going on there. Anyway.

We had a social with the club a couple of weekends ago, and then one on wednesday, the latter starting at my house. Bit of kino at the first one, this was a massive social at our uni with 6 others from around the UK so a massive night, didn't anything of each other towards the end as we were with different people etc. More kino at #2. After we left my house to go to the clubs, she and her friend went to the uni nightclub because they couldn't afford a taxi back from the one the rest of us were going to. No problem.

Hour or so later, get a text saying "**** scares me" (referring to the guy earlier). We start talking. She wants me to come meet her at the uni nightclub. I send:

me: we're staying here for a while... come back to mine later?" (preceeded by a bit of flirting)

Asks if i really want that, etc., asks me to come back to her uni accommodation, bit more back and forth. By this point it's 3am and i'm not getting a taxi over there when i have to be up in 5 hours so i suggest we see each other friday eveningish. Texts me first thing next morning asking how i feel, bit more banter, discussing what we're doing on the friday. I send:

me: we could have our own steak and bj day seeing as we missed out yesterday. buy me a steak and i might give you a bj. (male equivalent of valentine's day, but you know that. i thought i'd add a bit of humour to it)

She responds positively. More back and forth throughout the day, then she asks me about my friend, asking if i worry about him. I say it's a non-issue. She brings this up again later, asking why i think it's a non-issue, i reply saying they have no history together so it's not a problem, which she seems to accept. Few more shit tests from her, which i think i pass, such as:

her: haha how do you know!? you're the one who's 15 or less:P xx (sexual partners)
me: you can tell me if they're good or not, miss 15+ xx (oral skills)
her: haha this is true. why me?

Now there is where it gets a bit weird. She starts asking me why i want to get with her (on a sexual level, i think). Here's a bit of the exchange:

her: (stuff) and like why do you want to do that with me if you get me haaa xx
me: i get the impression we would have some crazy stuff happening.. Wink being attracted to makes it an easy decision xx
(next morning) her: hahaha attracted to me? how come? xx
me: you ask a lot of questions xx
her: i like knowing answers xx
me: i'll answer your question if you answer mine xx
her: what's yours? tell me first
me: (a would you rather... thing, to try and derail her a bit)

It kind of works, we talk about other things over the next couple hours, but she still pushes for an answer, so i give her something. Then tell her it isn't a one-way street and it's her turn, she obliges with her own compliments. Bit more back and forth.

Now she starts to make excuses to flake on these friday plans. The above conversation was from midday on friday. I try to make a break in this but to no avail. Examples:

me: get as much as done as you can before we do something later xx
her: haha what's happening later? xx
me: i think you were gonna come down here and then.. we'll go from there. xx
her: such a mission! need to write an essay before i go home too! Sad xx
me: irrelevant. xx
her: how!? xx
me: because you know you're gonna come anyway xx
her: i really can't though! promised my friend ill go snack bar with her at 9
Me: come down earlier then Razz xx
her: it wont be 9 it'll be like 7 but i'm in town center SPAM and then eassay writing! xx
me: different day then xx
her: when??? xx
me: tomorrow xx
her: i'll see when i wakeup but it's a possibility xx

Bit more banter, then later she mentions she has a headache and probably won't go out. I think she might be setting herself up here to flake the next day.

Bit of consolation for her later on from me, e.g.

me: not back home til 9 and *** will be out at a friend's bday. i can always nurse you back to health xx
her: why 9 and lol i need cuddles and sleep Smile xx
me: in gym. cuddles tomorrow, promise? xx (promise may seem a bit much but it's a reference to an earlier thread in the convo.)
her: maybes if you're luckyy xx

More after this but it's not important. By this point i know there's a high chance she'll flake again.

Now to midday today. Bit more back and forth, banter etc. Then:

me: sorting out plans for today, we doing something? xx ( i don't think going direct i.e. meet me at such and such at such a time, would have mattered here)
her: dunnooo am in bed xx
me: pillow fight? xx
her: hahahaa Razz am tired Sad xx
me: you don't even have to move from your bed Razz xx
her: how? xx (how? why? you what!? are her favoured responses, and they often make no sense, like here. I don't know why she does this.)
me: if we don't see each other today, this will be your second strike Smile xx
her: you what!? xx (.....)
me: i would prefer to see you as well as text xx
her: i'm confuseddd xx
me: how so? xx
her: idk just explain! xx

By this point i'm incredibly bored, so i just go direct.

me: i don't think it's confusing. we're attracted to each other so let's do something about it in person xx
her: hahaa xx

Up to date here. Not really sure where to go. Was thinking of either pursuing it further (bad idea), reverting to a less direct conversation or just not replying.


I know this is a long read, but i wanted to make sure i got in the up and down nature of the conversation over the last 3 days. A lot of the conversation i've ommitted (177 messages between us so far) contained a lot of back and forth, banter, humour, and a sexual energy to it, so i think on the whole the quality of conversation was good and varied.

I'm unsure as to why she is making it so hard to get anything going, especially after the kind of sexual texts we were exchanging on that wednesday night/thursday morning (i ommitted some of the other sexual stuff) and into friday. I admit my text game is still improving, so if there are any glaring mistakes here on my part, feel free to point them out. I've tried to pick out the threads where those mistakes may lie as i'm not typing out 177 messages.

Cheers fellas.

My oneites detector is going off.

When you said irrelevant, and she said how? Then you tried to flirt by saying she wouldn't even have to get out of bed........ Really? I think you insulted her and she was not sure if you just dissed her or not and wanted you to explain, then you just killed any attraction that was still there. You had her, then you lost her. You should have not acted like you where avoiding her question of why you wanted to fuck her and just told her. I really don't think that was a shit test. She just wants to know why your attracted to her. You could say anything here, even a simple "because your beautifull" would have worked and kept the vibe and convo going.

You should have NOT implied her flaking and said she is getting a strike for flaking. She didn't even flake she was BUSY. You are punishing her for no reason. Even though your just teasing, she does not take it that way. She is confused by your text. She does not seem interested, after you asks her to ćhill and she said no you should have dropped it for at least 2 weeks. But you kept texting her oooozing with neediness. Just chill out on her hook up with other bitches. This could still be salvageable, let her contact you, who has been initiating contact? Her?

Now that I think about it if she's been initiating contact you might still have a chance, build up more attraction.

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Stay High

"I'm savage as fuck, and willing and able and never got clowned cuz when it came around I was down to put my dick on the table"

Not oneitis in the slightest.

Are you mixing up two separate parts of the conversation or am i just misunderstanding your first paragraph? The irrelevant and how texts are in a completely different thread of conversation from the bed thing.

I can see where you're coming from with the flake thing, but we arranged to do something on the friday well before she said she was going to this snack bar with her friend. That in itself is flaking, no? As for the second "flake", well i guess that wasn't really a flake seeing as she said "it's a possibility" but whatever. I really don't think i kept on "oozing with neediness", i just decided to go a bit more direct as she was messing about.

I appreciate your insight. Tell me if you think i've misunderstood your view.

EDIT: Just noticed you added a few things in.

She has initiated all of the contact, and has on multiple occasions sent 2 messages to my one. At one point she pointed out that i can be slow to reply and "should stop being a loser and reply, gawd! xx". Probably should have mentioned this earlier, completely slipped my mind.

6 hours after that last "hahaa xx" text, so about an hour ago now, she sent me "have a good night, am off to sleep xx". I sent nothing inbetween, so this is her 4th or 5th double message. Not texting anything now as it'll just wake her up, will wait til i get off work tomorrow evening.

Nice good!

Honestly I'm in a similar situation with this young bitch, and it's difficult. She keeps texting calling non stop, I've k closed her already. These are the type's of girls that know we are playing them and like the attention. I have not initiated contact since last "flake" and she's been calling texting everyday. She is just really shy. Haha I love shy girls. Fucken hottt

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Stay High

"I'm savage as fuck, and willing and able and never got clowned cuz when it came around I was down to put my dick on the table"

Her last "haha" is compliance.

I would just say,"Meet me at . "

She would either give an excuse or accept. Then you get to stop fucking around with text game.

Really? How is it compliance? I'm still not very good at extrapolating these things from such short replies.

Had another text from her at 10 this morning, "hey how's your day? xx", only just seen it after getting off work at 5. That's 3 from her in a row. Problem is she goes home in 2 days for 3 weeks and i don't wanna have to maintain text game for 3 more weeks with us not having actually done anything. I do see her tomorrow night for a meal out with the club, guess I can try build more attraction then.

Build attraction? She seems attracted already. You need to kino up and f close that shit. The clocks ticking....

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Stay High

"I'm savage as fuck, and willing and able and never got clowned cuz when it came around I was down to put my dick on the table"

Gonna give it a damn good go tomorrow, haha. Failing that, we've got 4 days in ireland the week after for competitions. Plenty of opportunity on the nights out. Cheers for the advice mate.

It's compliance because she didn't say no and she didn't give an excuse. You didn't persist. She may have gotten together with you then if you had persisted...

I see. I'll bear that in mind.

Here's a strange turn of conversation on her part:

me: i'll tell you why you're really upset... xx
her: whyy? xx
me: we can't spend time together before agm (the meal out tomorrow)
her: haha aww :p you wish xx
me: having trouble admitting to it? xx
her: am i? x
me: it's obvious x
her: haha i don't do casual sex! and aweee! i love leap year such a great film ending haha xx

Never mentioned that film to her, hell i've never even heard of it. So what is the test here? To see if i home in on the casual sex bit? It's the first time she's come out and blatantly mentioned sex rather than just hinted at it.

Replied with:

me: good to know you won't just use me for sex xx
her: no but you will xx

Stumped.

Yeah, so you're trying to get her to own up to her feelings. Remember, you were the one who supposedly put them there, and it's really not her fault. Girls are just receptive.

Never try to tell a girl she likes you(with few exceptions). Example, if you're actually in person, and she does something, you can tease her and say some shit like "aww you like me". Stuff can come off weird when youre texting and things get out of hand fast.

Even if you say something like "we went on a date", sometimes they will try to say it wasn't a date, etc. It's all just bullshit to make them feel less slutty. Why do you care if she likes you if she's putting out? Don't make her feel like her actions are going to come back and ruin her reputation - that's important to her.

Just say something like "haha, I'm just fucking with you. Stop taking everything so seriously." Not everything is a test. That sort of mentality is pretty weak. Girls are just silly because they know they have no real control. All you have to do is touch them to turn them on. They have to dress up put makeup on, and put on all kinds of acts to get a guy hot.

Agree! Nice post!

Haha it's just so dope we are men. Don't you ever wake up and just thank god your a man. Women have it so bad. Haha men rule the world, women make it turn.

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Stay High

"I'm savage as fuck, and willing and able and never got clowned cuz when it came around I was down to put my dick on the table"

I just decided to ignore her "no but you will xx" and replied "gonna tell me how this film ends? xx". Maybe not as effective as disarming the comment altogether, but eh.