Ex everywhere i go, how to manage?



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PostPosted: Thu Sep 11, 2014 5:51 pm 
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New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Fri Aug 08, 2014 5:26 pm
Posts: 12
Hello PUA's

Long story short, my ex gf broke up with me 3 weeks ago because there was no
spark in our relationship, definitely not seeing anyone. I did agree there was no spark
but told her thats common after a honeymoon period of a 6 month relationship and
was upset but told her i think its best if we dont speak not more i deleted her of social
networking etc and blocked her on SPAM so i could move on - she has tried messa
ging me to rebuild our friendship although i dont reply.

Now the problem is, i do want her back however i know she doesnt want a relationship
right now and has lost attraction towards me however i know i can easily hook up with
her as a fwb but i dont want that. We have the same close university friends, im close
friends with the girls in the group they tell me everything. We have the same SPAM
group so its hard to not know what shes doing in her life or fully utilise no contact. And
we are in the same course and same seminar groups and go out on the same bar nights.

How should i behave around her, Do you think i should ignore her existence in person
when we are with our friends or atleast maintain some sort of contact with her personally
and keep building attraction/push-pull. I fear if i do so she will get the idea that im ok with
the break up and i can settle for less ( in reality i have not shown this i havent messaged her
and i have kept myself busy.

just a side note: she is popular like myself at university, she does modelling and all the girls
love her so it is quite difficult to game other chicks when they know we are on bad terms.


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 11, 2014 9:50 pm 
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MPUA Forum Zealot

Joined: Mon Jun 10, 2013 12:59 pm
Posts: 308
I'm in the same boat, as I will be seeing my ex tomorrow. No worries though I have been here many times. First know that you are going to feel somewhat akward...this is natural, but you will be able to handle it. Treat her as if she was any other acquaintance, because that is exactly who she is to you now....an acquaintance. Don't go out of your way to say hi but don't go out of your way to avoid her. If you have to talk to her make super small talk. For instance my ex tomorrow has gotten a new job, if I'm forced to talk to her, I will ask about that. I'll smile be polite end the conversation and tell her it was nice seeing her again. Thats it. Just don't stare at her, don't go out of your way to avoid or see her, make small talk, be the one to end the convo and tell her it was nice seeing her. Nothing more or less. Oh and definately don't talk to your mutual friends about her, even if they bring it up and cut contact with her via text and facebook.


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 12, 2014 12:45 pm 
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Moderator
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 13, 2013 6:17 pm
Posts: 3427
Location: Toronto, Canada
Treat her politely and like a human being, but I wouldn't go out of my way to be super friendly to her or anything. She is your ex.

As for getting her back into a relationship -- you said the spark was gone. You both agreed on this. Why will it be different? You may be better served moving forward, but if you want to get her back - my advice would be to find someone hotter, and make sure your ex sees you with her.

Jealousy is a very awesome weapon, my friend.


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 12, 2014 1:07 pm 
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Dedicated Member

Joined: Tue Mar 04, 2014 12:03 am
Posts: 582
Quote:
Hello PUA's

Long story short, my ex gf broke up with me 3 weeks ago because there was no
spark in our relationship, definitely not seeing anyone. I did agree there was no spark
but told her thats common after a honeymoon period of a 6 month relationship and
was upset but told her i think its best if we dont speak not more i deleted her of social
networking etc and blocked her on SPAM so i could move on - she has tried messa
ging me to rebuild our friendship although i dont reply.

Now the problem is, i do want her back however i know she doesnt want a relationship
right now and has lost attraction towards me however i know i can easily hook up with
her as a fwb but i dont want that. We have the same close university friends, im close
friends with the girls in the group they tell me everything. We have the same SPAM
group so its hard to not know what shes doing in her life or fully utilise no contact. And
we are in the same course and same seminar groups and go out on the same bar nights.

How should i behave around her, Do you think i should ignore her existence in person
when we are with our friends or atleast maintain some sort of contact with her personally
and keep building attraction/push-pull. I fear if i do so she will get the idea that im ok with
the break up and i can settle for less ( in reality i have not shown this i havent messaged her
and i have kept myself busy.

just a side note: she is popular like myself at university, she does modelling and all the girls
love her so it is quite difficult to game other chicks when they know we are on bad terms.
No contact doesn't work just because the girl doesn't get to communicate with you. It works because it shows her that you aren't some emotional suck and that you are fine without her. No contact is a good tool, but if this girl is forced to be around you, and you around her, what works even better than no contact is for you to show that you are unfazed. Flirt with other girls, be outgoing, flirty and funny. Greet her just like you would any other person in that group and act like she is no different. Never go out of your way to do anything for her. Don't start up conversations with her. She's just there.

If you come across correctly this is way more powerful than just no contact.


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