Does having sex too soon ruin chances for relationships



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PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2014 4:33 am 
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Most of the girls I have sex with on the same night end up as one night stands, although a select few I bang again or have a FWB type of relationship with.

How long should you typically wait before having sex, considering you want the girl to be your girlfriend.

More specifically. I met a girl last week at a party, we flirted around and danced that night. I got her number and we have been texting. We both talk about how attractive the other person is, plus she sent me some hot pics. Overall, she makes me feel good. She has pretty face and perfect body, so naturally I want to bang her as quick as possible. I can tell she is into the sexual vibe, though my concern is bang her too fast without establish comfort, then a possible relationship is out of the question, on the other hand I do not want to wait too long and come off as a pussy.

All things considered, I want to get to know her better before make a decision about her being a girlfriend, but if I hook up with her as soon as possible will that prevent such an opportunity.


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PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2014 8:19 am 
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Quote:
Most of the girls I have sex with on the same night end up as one night stands, although a select few I bang again or have a FWB type of relationship with.

How long should you typically wait before having sex, considering you want the girl to be your girlfriend.

More specifically. I met a girl last week at a party, we flirted around and danced that night. I got her number and we have been texting. We both talk about how attractive the other person is, plus she sent me some hot pics. Overall, she makes me feel good. She has pretty face and perfect body, so naturally I want to bang her as quick as possible. I can tell she is into the sexual vibe, though my concern is bang her too fast without establish comfort, then a possible relationship is out of the question, on the other hand I do not want to wait too long and come off as a pussy.

All things considered, I want to get to know her better before make a decision about her being a girlfriend, but if I hook up with her as soon as possible will that prevent such an opportunity.
Short answer = No.

My 3 year long relationship started out as a one night stand


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PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2014 12:38 pm 
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Same deal -

I find that whether you sleep with them in the first week or a month later it has no bearing on relationship potential.


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PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2014 3:57 pm 
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Whether a relationship occurs or not depends on how well you can connect with her on a deeper level. Attracting a woman, gaining her trust in you by showing you are a discreet, relyable person, and seducing her is enough for a fuck. But you need to build some real connection to get her interested in a relationship. This can be done if you fuck the first time you meet, but personally, I prefer getting to know the other person a bit more and then see if she's my type personality wise. It's a lot easier to build this connection on a date. So I'm saying it doesn't necessarily ruin the chances of a relationship to go to bed as soon as possible, but it's easier to go for it by not doing so.

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PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2014 6:44 pm 
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Sex releases the bonding hormone oxytocin, it's natures way of making sure you don't leave her if she's pregnant. For most of human history it meant any child wouldn't survive if she didn't have anyone to provide for her and your offspring (genes).

If you want the girl to become more attached to you and consider her LTR material then give her lots of touch and cuddling after the act, that ramps the oxytocin even higher.

It's surprising how many couples started off as a "One night stand".


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 11, 2014 3:23 am 
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Take her out for a couple hours and build comfort. Once you've reached 7-10 cumulative hours with her (which it sounds like should only take you a couple of hours to do), begin the seduction phase. At that point, if you didn't have any serious DLVs during comfort building, she will be good to go with no buyer's remorse and very little, if any, LMR.

Pull the trigger, bro. If you do encounter any LMR, which it doesn't sound like you will, just remember two steps forward and one step back. Wash, rinse, repeat.


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 11, 2014 5:04 am 
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As you know, you have sex with a girl and the dynamic changes. She really opens up as do you. Before that, one mis-step on your part and she could walk. In contrast, a girl could pretty much say anything and as a guy we'll still want to bang.

After sex however, you could tell her the most embarrassing thing in the world about yourself and she'll most likely be all "oh is that right baby that's so cute." In my view the sooner the sex the better, whether you want a relationship or not.


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 11, 2014 4:42 pm 
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A womans power lays within your fear of what she is going to do. If you're worried about coming off as a pussy; she will view you as a pussy. If you don't care; he intuition will pick up on it and respect your attitude.

But I have to wonder.. why is it that you want a relationship? Relationships to me are things that girls want so they can feel more secure in having the feelings they have for you. What on earth could come out of you having a relationship? Whats in it for you? If a girl likes you enough she's going to be loyal to you and just you anyway because she's not biologically wired to have strong emotional romantic feelings for more than one guy at a time.

So whats in it for you?

A man wanting a relationship seems to be a "pussy" type thing in itself.

I have a girlfriend and I gave her a relationship with me because she was serious about getting me to commit to her. And if i wouldn't commit to her she would rather be alone. So i gave it to her because thats what she wanted. But i didn't get anything out of it necessarily. I just lost privileges that I had prior to honoring that request. i.e. being with other women.

Tell me though bro.. Why do you want one?

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