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What you're failing to grasp is she was already done with the relationship with you, and you knew it. Lingering around and negotiating, OR trying to manipulate someone to continue on and THEN say you're done is far removed from having any sense of self-respect.
So, in the end, you did wrong to yourself by allowing it to continue past the expiration date.
With all my respect but I don't think you understood the whole situation. I admire your advice however.
I think there is some predisposition in the forum that everyone who posts a thread with a "problem" of some sort either has self-esteem issues or is being manipulative. That might be the case for many people, but not for everyone. Don't generalize please.
And here I'll argument myself (because if I don't I'll probably look like too arrogant... probably)
On the topic of manipulation - I didn't intended to manipulate her ever. Even when I told her what I said the last time, I still didn't mean to manipulate or trick her in order to receive selfish dividends for it. OK truth be told - yes of-course I want her to be with me, but life not always gives you what you want and most of the time one has to accept the reality. So it just felt the natural thing to do for me, however probably it looked to you (forum members) as a manipulation. Which I don't blame you for that - just different points of view.
Same thing with negotiating her or giving her ultimatums - I already explained that in my prev. reply.
And for that one -
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So, in the end, you did wrong to yourself by allowing it to continue past the expiration date.
Yes I could agree to some extend with that, that my mistake was probably I was having imaginary expectations that were not realistic.
expiration date = the day she took the plane for home - is that what you mean?
When a woman's giving signs she's no longer on board with the relationship, as Jackzero stated simply grin and bare it and move on.
Instead you clung to your ego and took the path of greatest resistance not realize how much you were setting yourself back in doing so.
As for manipulations, they don't have to be conscious to be used. We all use manipulative tactics in some form or other, largely they exist out of our awareness.
CHAT
