Sorry to intrude on your thread, but I just have to comment on this. I never actually believed women are really like this, until I heard a couple of horror stories like yours. It's not the first time I heard a woman totally obnoxiously disrespects her man after getting financially secured and then disses him like an old mop. It just blows my mind. I then wonder what's up with the rest of them, because I always thought women were like my mom, brave, sacrificing everything for the sake of the family, caring even when others don't deserve it etc. I do know some women who are like that, is that even attainable? Is my mom like that because my dad just cares less? Shit, it's really confusing sometimes.

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rAFC and yes, I'm a chick.

I have bursts of being a lady, but it doesn't last long.

you could never "intrude" because YOU are always welcome!

and you know, everytime i post something like this about "women", i feel like apologizing to you almost immediately, lol, and/or sending you a PM saying "all women except txacoli".

you're a cool chick. and seem like a genuinely thoughtful and decent person.

the answer is...i don't know.

i don't think that it is necessarily that women are evil. on the contrary, it might be a way of "teaching" us men that if we don't act like men, they won't treat us like men. you see?

either way, i quit wondering "why" a long time ago.

i am officially a fucking alpha male now. i dominate and could give a fuck less what anybody within 50 feet of me thinks.

and the BEAUTIFUL PART...it's not an act. lol

i hear these guys "how do i ACT alpha"?

i've finally obtained that state of mind. one of total arrogance.

hugs

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

*Melting*

I think you're on to something with the "teaching". I'm sorry you had to go through such shit to get to where you are now, I wish I could give a fuck less without such an experience. I do know one thing though, I've seen it countless times, the seed of "evil" in women. I can't believe I already forgot about that. Every woman has this tendency in her to walk all over you if you let her. I mean it's obvious, that's why we're all here. Then comes the question, does that mean I can never let go of myself in front of my gf, show I care, etc. It's not about that, of course you can, she won't walk over you if you know who you are. This question has been on my mind a lot lately, I got really confused reading the questions of all these guys in apparently good relationships almost panicking they're losing her and wondering how they can be more "alpha" etc. It just hit me now, with what you've said, it's not even about avoiding her evil seed to sprout, it's about bringing the best out of her, getting her good seed going, the one where she will do just about anything to protect her family, her mate, where she will be loving, caring, be an amazing companion who will stand behind her man, but it's hard to stand behind somebody who doesn't know who he is. By being true to yourself you can "teach" her to be a good woman. So in short, in the end you can't really fake it till you make it. You have to be it.
Still some women are just bitches There are damaged people everywhere though, we'll weed through them

Thanks for the reply Mack 2.0
XOXO

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rAFC and yes, I'm a chick.

I have bursts of being a lady, but it doesn't last long.

Hello,

i have an open question which is not risen from a particular experience.
When i get shit tests or just jokes from my gf like when she laughs at me for something i said for example; i normally just laugh and show no signs of being affected by it.

So my question is if its the best thing to do, or maybe i should give it more importance if it becomes more often? it can feel as she can be losing respect for me.

In this same subject, when i see my girl talking with another guy in a pub or something, should i freeze her out and be a bit distant afterwards until see gets to say she is sorry for her behaviour disrespecting me? or is it better to just ignore it and when she comes back just be in a good mood like nothing wrong has happened/i didnt mind it?.

you are overthinking things...

laugh when she picks on you.

correct her if she disrespect you.

laugh when a guy talks to her.

dump her when a guy fucks her.

next please.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

hmm, interesting conversation we've got going here.

i'll go a little further with it.

i'm going to be referring to 'straight' women with this statement...

they want:

- dominance, strength, authority

and

- sex

it's what i call "Daddy-with-a-Dick" syndrome

women basically want a daddy with a dick.

this is what i've found to be true.

maybe this is epidemic due to the high frequency of absentee fathers or unknown fathers or single mothers in our culture.

daddy issues.

the reason that i'm not good at relationships, is that i DON'T WANT THAT.

i don't want authority over another person.

i prefer "partnership" and "respect"...

but i know where that gets me.

same place it gets every other guy.

if us guys want the pussy and want it to behave,

we must, willingly or begrudgingly, step into our roles as:

Daddy-with-a-Dick

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Yes, I agree. One thing I noticed in LTRs is the development of a mother-child relationship with AFCs. If you don't take the role of a daddy-with-a-dick, she will inevitably step into her mother role and force the guy into the child role. If it's a good behaving child, you have the typical AFC, she asks/demands things from him, he complies and gets a reward, if he doesn't comply, he gets a punishment. He may even think he's happy, because she can totally calibrate how far she can go. And as you said, it starts off with the equal partner and slowly develops into this unhealthy but socially accepted thing. I immediately think of "Everybody loves Raymond" LOL.
If the child is misbehaved, you have either a typical douchebag, badboy type, or the artist, save me sort of guy. She forgives all sorts of crap, but has to take the responsibility and the leader position. This even isn't so bad for the guy, but there can be a lot of drama and just an emotional roller-coaster.
BUT, both of these actually make the women feel quite unhappy! If the child is well behaved, she always wants more, she starts to feel frustrated, feels like she has to take care of everything, loses respect, interest and attraction. If the child is misbehaved, well, obviously she's frustrated, but she can probably go on for a long time in this sort of relationship as long as the guy can seem genuinely sorry and seem like he's really going to change in crucial moments when she wants to leave. I think this is what my parents have.
So I guess the only viable option is your daddy-with-a-dick.
I can see it with my ex. After our "wonderful" mother-child relationship, she got with a professional daddy-with-a-dick soldier. She's fucking happy! I'm happy for her because she was always a decent person and it's not her fault I was an AFC, she just did her thing, the thing every woman does naturally.

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rAFC and yes, I'm a chick.

I have bursts of being a lady, but it doesn't last long.

yep, i know exactly what you are talking about.

my perfect girl would be my partner in crime.

equals to the very end BUT with RESPECT for each other.

kinda like the juliet lewis to my woody harrelson...

(natural born killers)



no mommy/daddy bullshit..

just "ride or die" mentallity.

a gangsta bitch basically

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

hey, my question is:

What is the ideal relationship?

Should the girl be running around to please the guy all the time?
Should the guy just be open, let her go out and do what ever she wants?
Ive been told that if you say all that romantic stuff like "youre the one for me" ends relationships.

i know how to pick up girls and create attraction, but im useless afterwards. it usually ends up in me running out of material and going back to my old afc self...with them running away.

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Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted.

So I'm somewhat new at pickup but I picked up a very cute girl flying home from winter break to home. Were both 20 years old Juniors In college at universities in states somewhat far from each other. She isn't from where I live but was just visiting someone for a couple days. I met her while sitting down at the gate- we immediately gelled and got along really well. Our plane got delayed for like 6 hours- and the time flew by like that! Holding and making out with her on the plane was the greatest time I've ever had with a girl. We've talked every day for like 3 weeks now whether its texting/on the phone. and we ve both made it clear how interested we are in each other. She also believes in astrology- and according to astrology our two signs get along very well- which probably helps me. Imagine she's this girl- who believes in this astrology thing and this great confident man comes up to her in the airport and charms her. ITs probably like what she's always imagined.

I kinda like the fact that I could be this guy for her. I honestly think of her all day. I'm a good guy whether I want to be or not. I've tried fucking girls I barely know and I cant. I'm a virgin and my subconscious wont let me get laid (get hard when were about to have sex) with a girl I don't love. I missed many chances to have my first kiss til I did it my freshman year of hs with my first serious gf and I'm proud of that. I see so many beautfiul girls and I know I would like to fuck them. But whether I like it or not Im a good guy and am looking for something really real and beyond life.

This LDR will be a lot of work but I'm confident in myself to keep her charmed and interested. Do you or anyone else think I'm being a big vagina by falling for of the very first beautiful girls I pickup one I learned the stuff? I read what other people write and they seem to hook up with a lot of girls before they get in a relationship. I do not plan on cheating on her. I'd love for your perspective on this.

Basically I have a problem. I sarged tonight. I literally feel that I have so much power now. I can get girls so easily now that its not even fun. I'm still a virgin. Im used to thinking girls were so hard to get and that if I can one beautiful girls it would be awesome. Now I can get so many! SO I'm at a crossroads in my life. Do I go after the LDR with the girl I mentioned and basically try and follow the love story of a movie- which I believe I can do or do I become a player and have sex with many girls? Never thought I'd have to deal with this problem. It hard for me to pickup a beautiful girls and not imagine an LTR with her.

This is an interesting discussion you guys are having, and I wonder if all LTR's descend into either the daddy-with-a-dick or mother-child complex, or if there is any middle ground. Naturally, I'm beginning to wonder which extreme does my current relationship lean towards, or whether I am somewhere in the middle. More than anything, what would be the obvious signs for either categories that one should look out for?

Personally speaking, I fuck my chick superbly, so much so in fact that she's become a nympho, I kid you not, and now initiates sex every single day often more than thrice a day(even on her periods), which is a complete contrast to the first two months where I was the primary initiator and we had an average of 3 times per week. She went on holiday in between, where she literally fell in love with me, and has since declared her feelings for me on a constant daily basis. I've not returned the favour, even though I've been financially and emotionally supportive to her, but she's aware that I don't (yet) love her.

She does like to pretend I am a child sometimes with her trying to feed me (when we're gone out to eat and I'm refusing to eat something) when I am keen on abiding to my diet, although it's difficult for me to abstain because of how good it feels to be with her. On the other side, if I feel she crosses me, then I let her know , and I don't take shit from her, though I am very patient. She does get upset these days if I a even if I see her every day. I don't know, I want to know where our relationship is, so any tell tale signs to look out for would be very welcome.

Another question, are certain IOI's overstated. I often see girls walking alone on the street, constantly flicking their hair and playing with it, even though there is no-one within a mile of her. Obviously, if a girl has refrained from touching her hair, but then flicks it wholly backwards when speaking to you, or after seeing you, then it may be an IOI, but could it also be a coincidence? I often analyse my GF when she is communicating with other males, and I've seen here constantly touch her hair when speaking to another guy, both old and young, irrespective of attraction, and still constantly touch her hair when speaking. She's even rested her head sideways onto my shoulder when interacting with another male, and I'm sure tilting of the head is also considered as an IOI. Keep in mind, that some of these guys are also people she is familiar with, like work colleagues or former landlords. So my question is, can they be overstated, and to only be sought out in certain contexts?

Well, I've not been daddy-with-a-dick yet, so I can't say anything about that. But I have ample AFC experience. Usually the relationship doesn't go into the mother-child mode at the beginning. Maybe if a guy is a total AFC and the girl chose him because she wanted a boyfriend, it develops earlier. But let's say you start out as equals, which your relationship sounds like. At first, the girl is totally in love, she wants sex, she shows respect and interest in you as a person, she's smitten by the songs you write and supports you all the way, she feels you're the best thing that ever happened to her etc. All good. With time, lets say after a year or two, she slowly begins to demand more of you, more commitment, moving in together or whatever and more and more she wants to run your lifestyle. The frontier of you two as individuals is replaced by "us". This all happens very slowly and subtly if she's smart. Most of the times the guy doesn't even notice it. Your friends and hobbies might begin to bother her, since it's taking your time away from her vision of the two of you. Suddenly your interests are not as important as your common goals (her goals actually). She will display her insatisfaction with your decisions that don't fit her vision more openly and start to nag and blackmail you emotionally or withholding sex etc. That's when the full-blown mother-child relationship is at work. If you behave, you get a treat (compliments, affection and sex), if you misbehave you are punished (silent SPAM, nagging, no sex, emotional blackmail, crying and blowing things out of proportions)
Signs to look out for (this is an extreme generalization, but here it is):
-She starts to arrange furniture and shit in your place
-Her saying, must you go out? I wanted to do xy with you + emotional blackmail when you come home; Nags when you come home drunk
-Frowns at the mention your best friend is visiting
-She'd rather you accept a better paid job than the one that interests you more
-She suggests you stop with your hobby so you have more time for "your common" goals or common hobbies, your hobbies are stupid and immature anyways and your songs are not that good anyways, why do you need to express yourself creatively? All you do is get drunk after the rehearsals anyways. LOL
-She suggests you're drinking too much (who wouldn't when she's become a bitch)
-It's ok to spend time with her friends and family, but somehow it's not ok to do it with yours, or she doesn't seem to make time for your friends and family so you go alone (which is a mistake, because when you go out drinking with your buddies later that week, she'll protest you're out all the time) LOL
-She makes firm plans for your life together and later just informs you (this one's a biggie obviously)
-She cheats with a cuban dj after a reggaeton session LOL

These are some signs, but it's probably too late then. I guess the best sign of all is when she starts emotional blackmail and nagging for any reason. It's best to stop that kind of behavior immediately. I'm saying this in faith that the guy is normal and dedicates a normal amount of time and emotional investment into the relationship. I guess the moment she realises she has power over you, when you react to her nagging, crying or silent SPAM, her evil seed will sprout. She knows just how far you can go, she's excellent at calibrating rewards and demands. She turns into a dragon woman and you're sometimes afraid of her. Damn, it's so good to be free.

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rAFC and yes, I'm a chick.

I have bursts of being a lady, but it doesn't last long.

Thanks, by emotionally blackmailing, you mean her attacking you emotionally with reasons that are untrue, like her suggesting you never have time for her, even though you've just spent every minute of the past week with her, and she's just blurted that out the first moment you decided to meet a friend, instead of her?

Furthermore, what would be the best way to react to such nagging and blackmail? I usually call her out on it, and she's even subsequently admitted it to be untrue, but like how can you constantly keep on top of her in that particular regard? I've noticed fleeting instances of some of the signs you've mentioned, and it's especially difficult for me, as I don't feel as strongly for her, as she does for me. She often mentions how she loves me, wants to marry, have children with me, even though I have said no to her in all three regards, but she claims to not care, because I make her very happy regardless.

On a side note, it'd be funny if my GF tries to blackmail me with sex, because it seems like I have the dick power at the moment, LOL. It's now a case of me having to refuse her, as opposed to the conventional vice versa dynamic.

I suppose this is the extreme example;

http://www.theonion.com/articles/area-g ... erso,2714/